[Copypasta] I get a thousand hugs from 10,000 lightning bugs

twitchquotes: πŸ€” In the song "Fireflies" by Owl City he states "I get a thousand hugs from 10,000 lightning bugs." Are we to assume each bug hugs him a thousand times? Or is he only getting hugged by 1/10th of the bugs? Or is each bug is giving him 1/10th of a hug? πŸ€”
twitch chat
June 2017
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I want to give you head

twitchquotes: I want to give you head. Yes, head. Not the one you're thinking of. Not even in a sexual way. I want to give you heads up about the walk for charity. Yes, a walk for charity through which we can touch the lives of children living in extreme poverty.
twitch chat
February 2019

Not your naked body

DL aka β€œDropped Liability” is an ex-ADC player for TL

twitchquotes: DL aka β€œDropped Liability” is an ex-ADC player for TL that is often ridiculed for his inability to use the summoner spell Flash. He is specifically known for his β€œEveryone is trash” mindset, which he only recently realized applied mostly to himself.
twitch chat
March 2020
Doublelift

League of Legends

Kripp with sunglasses

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–“β–„β–‘ ░▐▓▒░▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▒▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▓ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–β–“β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘ β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–“β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–“β–’β–“β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–€β–’β–„
January 2015
Kripp

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: β€’ ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight β€’ ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor β€’ ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) β€’ ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns β€’ ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man β€’ ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" β€’ ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos β€’ ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) β€’ ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

I beat Kripp once, but my deck was insane

twitchquotes: I beat Kripp once, but my deck was insane, I topdecked the exact cards I needed for lethal, actually Kripp played it perfectly, there was nothing he could do, it was such a joke.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Text-to-Speech Playing