[Copypasta] Yeah I'm a big deal, I start memes in chat

twitchquotes: WTF DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME YOU LITTLE SHIT?! I'll have you know i've started more memes in this chat than any man living. You think you got what it takes to go toe to toe with me? You don't. You're nothing. Your just a little Pleb in the wind, less than insignificant. I scrape more important shits of my sheets in the morning. Yeah i'm a big deal, i start memes in Twitch chat, so copy my pasta or step off, kid.
twitch chat
November 2016
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Dragon maid booba vs. Konosuba booba

July 2021

NSFW

I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now

I've been unvaccinated for 9 months now, moving from place to place, keeping ahead of the vaxmaxers, never staying anywhere too long, never letting my face become known. "It's great being vaxmaxed isn't it" the shopkeep says vacantly, to nobody in particular. In keeping with the act I reply to the Heinz Baked Beans Substitute 6 Pack (No Plastic) in my hand, something unrelated, with what I hope is a slightly bemused tone. It takes a lot longer to do my shopping these days, I can't simply march through the shop in an orderly fashion, taking what I need in a single trip, I have to absent mindedly shuffle back and forward between the aisles, never really displaying any intent. As unpresent as they are, the vaxmaxed would notice if I was too focused, too alert. A loud smashing sound in the distance almost blows my cover, I notice, and focus on the sound. The vaxmaxed around me slowly aim their distant gaze on me, but I'm able to save myself, I continue my neck jerk and turn it in to a series of spasms, I drop to the floor convulsing, the vaxmaxed around me quickly lose interest and continue on with their day. "That means it's working" one elderly lady comments to her milk as she passes. I continue the charade long enough to filter out most of the vaxmaxed sharing the aisle. It takes a while, and no insubstantial amount of sweat on my part, but I make it to the checkout. A morbidly obese woman directs the horde at the tills, seemingly oblivious to the cacophony of aberrant scan noises and blinking red lights above the entirely self service super checkout. I wait dutifully, not wanting to be noticed, not wanting to be set upon by the Asda Security Vax Checker team, it had taken all my best bluffing to get past them at the door, I almost chuckled when they believed my vax card was in the post but it was quickly stifled, a chuckled would have given me away, a chuckle would have seen me held down and injected with science juice.
April 2022

COVID

Coronavirus

My family keeps making Amongus references

It seems like the more I (13 M) play Amongus, the more my family tries to embaras me. The other day, I overheard my dad (49 M) say that he needed to "complete tasks" while working at home😯🀬 don't worry it gets worse. Then I hear my Mom (42 F) say that the amount of time I spend on my computer is "suspiscios." Ummm ok so (#1) ur too good to say "sus" πŸ€” and (#2) u dont even play amogus??? πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚. Even my moms work friend (28 M or somthing idk) came over yesterday to "look at her vents" I'm not even making this up πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„ But then the worse partπŸ˜‘ every sunday my granpa (69 M) comes over. He reminisces about his "Crewmates" from his Navy days and apparently a few of them died so u cry about it at dinner? Just start a new game FFS πŸ˜† but he's lying so uhhh we get it bro: u just want attention πŸ˜―πŸ˜…πŸ€£ The problem is NONE of them even Play Omungus. How do i tell em that being a poser is a cringe Brie Larson unholesome Black History Month anti-chungus move?
March 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Dear Kripp, this is Kevin Kuntmeyer from P.E.T.A

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is Kevin Kuntmeyer from P.E.T.A. It has come to my attention that you brutally brofisted a small defenseless Kitten in its adorable face live on your stream moments ago. If you do not apologize and rub his little tum tum for 20 minutes on stream, I will be forced to punish you to the fullest extent of the law. You've been warned...
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp needs to find a Romanian woman

twitchquotes: KRIPP! This is Papparian, your father! What is this I hear about marrying a Greek woman and making mini kripps with her??!! You need to find yourself a real full bodied Romanian woman, boy. One that can hand squeeze OJ and carry on our bloodline.
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
More Copypastas
Text-to-Speech Playing