[Copypasta] I'm done with this chat

twitchquotes: That's it, I'm done. *** this chat. It's devolved into a mass of retarded copy pastes and face spam. The quality of twitch chat has been declining for a while, but this is the last straw. That's it. I'm done. I'm uninstalling the internet, chopping off my dick and moving to *** Antarctica, at least the bacteria there will be *** smarter discourse.
twitch chat
March 2014

Classic

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Malta vs Penguins

This does not change the fact that in Antarctica there are 21 million penguins and in Malta there are 502,653 inhabitants. So if the penguins decide to invade Malta, each Maltese will have to fight 42 penguins.
May 2021

Classic

A New Toucan Has Arrived

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘Aβ–‘NEWβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘TOUCANβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘HASβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–€β–ˆβ–’β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ARRIVEDβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β– β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–“β–“β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β– β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
January 2019

Classic

Flanders Diddly Spamly Doodly

β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’DIDDLYβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–’β–’SPAMLYβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’DOODLYβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–’β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–’β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–„β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–€β–’β–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–Œβ–’β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–„β–€β–’β–Œ β–‘β–€β–„β–β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β– β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–
ascii art
September 2016

Classic

I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter

I sexually Identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is Impossible and I'm *** retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AMG-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
November 2014

Classic

I sexually Identify as

Think about your actions

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although this subreddit has 179,776 readers, I am not receiving 179,776 upvotes on my posts. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to click 'upvote'. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to upvote my most recent posts. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
September 2018

Classic

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