[Copypasta] Brazilian No. 1 Futbol Player Eduardo Pasterinho

twitchquotes: Wᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇᴛ Kʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪᴀɴ! Iᴛ ɪs I, Bʀᴀᴢɪʟɪᴀɴ Nᴏ. 1 ғᴜᴛʙᴏʟ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇʀ Eᴅᴜᴀʀᴅᴏ Pᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴʜᴏ. Aғᴛᴇʀ ᴍʏ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ ɢᴏᴛ ᴡʀᴇᴄᴋᴇᴅ ʙʏ ᴛʜᴇ Gᴇʀᴍᴀɴ ᴛʀʏʜᴀʀᴅs, I ғᴇᴀʀ ғᴏʀ ᴍʏ ᴊᴏʙ. Pʟs ʜᴇʟᴘ ʙʏ ᴅᴏɴᴀᴛɪɴɢ sᴀʟᴛ ᴏʀ ᴛᴏᴘᴅᴇᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍʏ sᴀʟᴀʀʏ. Pʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘᴀ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴʜᴏ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage far too small for himself. Malnourished because of his "vegan" diet, his ribs are clearly visible through his coat. He barely has the energy to move, let alone enjoy life. Yet, he knows there's hope. He knows he could draw attention to himself, as he hears Kripp constantly talking to someone. In a single act of defiance, Dex barks to draw attention to his dire situation. "Quiet, Dex" is his only reply as Kripp ignores his pleas yet again.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp

Diablo 2 was great Kripp

twitchquotes: (◕‿◕✿) Diablo 2 was great Kripp, I especially loved the part where you mindlessly clicked in an endless, ball-numbing drone for hours on end as the screen flooded with indiscernible ***. (◕‿◕✿)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Officer Dongerino of the Blizzard PD

twitchquotes: Kripp, This is Officer Dongerino of the Blizzard PD. We need to question you about adjusting your Windows Clock to get ahead on opening Packs. If any of you copy and paste this, you will be subject to banning from Blizzard games forever. Come with me, Kripp
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

When Cybrix buys a Pepperoni pizza

twitchquotes: When Cybrix buys a Pepperoni pizza, its seen as a bit of greasy fun. BUT when Kripp orders a 420 GreaseMaster Pro 5000 garbage pizza pie with 6 different types of pepperoni, spiceified sauce with non-drip collection tray, together with optional built in Cheese crust, hes called Fattarrian
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

The legend of the button

twitchquotes: The legend of the button grew as the potential dust reward that came with it increased. But in the end when the no life Kripparian who had long sold out pressed it, the playful sprites robbed him of his joy and crashed his client. Kripp fell to his knees and in a solemn proclamation said "Never Lucky".
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

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