[Copypasta] Hey chat, here's a high five for you

twitchquotes: (◞≼◉ื≽◟ ;益;◞≼◉ื≽◟) ╭∩∩∩∩∩╮ HEY CHAT HERE'S A HIGH FIVE FOR YOU (◞≼◉ื≽◟ ;益;◞≼◉ื≽◟) ╭∩∩∩∩∩╮
twitch chat
November 2014
I used to be a real ad
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I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking (Nolan Grayson)

I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking. I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Nolan Grayson. That perfect, shredded body. The perfectly trimmed mustache. The planet conquering skills of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with him, have him pass his genes through me, and have me birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance for Nolan Grayson to get me pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Robert Kirkman create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
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Ingrid Newkirk, leader of the largest animal rights group

twitchquotes: Ingrid Newkirk here,leader of the largest animal rights group,PETA.How DARE you soil that innocent dog's ears with the word "weiner" and "Dolly"?That's like excessively cursing at a newborn.The cops should be there soon.Bye.
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imaqtpie

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April 2021

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my friend is intellectually inferior for me for being christian

Ok, so today I was talking to my friend over text. I asked him what's his favorite anime but then he told me that he doesn't watch it and thinks it's boring. I was confused as to why he didn't watch anime. I told him about how much I like to watch anime "for the plot" but he didn't really show much interest. I then asked him if we could play Among Us later but then he said he has to go to church this afternoon. I never knew he was a Christian. I was asking him why he believed in God and he didn't reply so I told him he's intellectually inferior to me and that his parents indoctrinated him into believing in God. I was sending him scientific studies that show proof that atheists are more intellectually superior to people who believe in religion. I later found out that he was attending a funeral at the church.
December 2020

Patrick Star - I am back

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August 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing