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Response to someone correcting spelling

whats that? holy shit. holy fucking shit. you fucking genius. did you actually just correct someone's spelling? you fucking madlad. i can't believe i just witnessed one of the greatest achievements in human history right now. i think im gonna cry, im so excited. to be honest, i would suck your dick to reward you for your HUGE contribution to the human race if the line wasnt so long. you know what? fuck it. ill let you fuck my wife. ill pay you to fuck her. only for the slim chance that one of her kids will have a small part of your magnificent iq. ill mortgage my fucking house just so you could have 15 minutes with her, while hoping that your MASSIVE cock won't rip her in half. after that, we should start a religion for you. fuck jesus, the only thing this dick did is resurrect himself. you are entitled to the praise he's getting. we should make you immortal. losing you would mean stopping the human evolution and we would all revert to monkeys, not that we are more than monkeys in your majestic presence. I suggest we go to the UN and tell them to hand over all their authority to you, im sure you can unite all the people of the world just with a single swing of your cock, making the entire population wet in the process. just before that one more thing: can you shut the fuck up? nobody cares about that fucking typo you single chromosomed retarded gnome. I bet you think you are so fucking smart and witty after pointing something that didnt bother anyone. God, you are fucking pretentious, i bet you actually believed all of the text above. Did you think i would let you fuck my wife? She is only 12 you sick paedophile. Im calling the police so you could be tortured for eternity while your remains will be forcibly fed to everybody from your family or anyone even remotely related to you while they are forced to anally fuck a penguin. no, seriously do you think i'm joking? i'll come to your house and fuck your ass with a cactus. not that you would feel it after all the things you already had up there. you're a fucking twat that doesnt contribute to society and you deserve to die slowly.
October 2021

it's okay take monday off

twitchquotes: It's ok [insert streamer name], take off monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday, saturday, sunday, january, february, march, april, may, june, july, august, september, october, november, december. 2020, 2021, 2022, 2023, 2023, 21st century, 22nd century, 23rd century off. you work too hard. :)
twitch chat
September 2020
I used to be a real ad

Cinco de Mayo Emoji Pasta

HOLA👋🏻 all you dirty little TACO🌮SLUTS😘🤣do you know what day it is?!🤔 I smell immigrants🙎🏾‍♂️🙋🏽‍♂️ and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION🙅🏼 so it must be SINKO DE FUCKING MAYONNAISE😩💦🍻🌮❤️🌯 Hide your KIDS👨‍👩‍👧‍👦, hide your BURRITOS🌯, and get your CUMMIES READY😩cause DADDY TRUMP🇧🇪is coming to deport us all🤷🏽‍♂️🙆🏾 But DONT FORGET to drink TACOS 🌮 and eat TEQUILA 🍸because the only way for you FILTHY CUMSLUTS to stay in America🇺🇸is to PARTYYY🎈🎉🎁😍💦😩 So send this to CINCO(5 you dumb bitch) of the SLUTTIEST😏 jars of MAYO you know and if you DONT ❌get any back you get NO 🚫🚫CULTURAL CUMMIES 😭🤷🏽‍♂️🌮💦😩
May 2022

Cinco de Mayo

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

you can't spell "advertisements"

you can't spell "advertisements" without semen between tits
March 2021

You offered me a snack but baby I want the whole kitchen

twitchquotes: Hey big sexy, @thijs looking cute today. It’s me, Ricardo, your internet boyfriend. You offered me a snack but baby I want the whole kitchen. See you at the club later baby. <3
twitch chat
May 2019
Thijs
I used to be a real ad

UwU in the streets

twitchquotes: i’m an UwU in the streets but an OwO in the sheets
twitch chat
February 2019

You have posted a bad meme

twitchquotes: Greetings. It appears as though you have posted a "bad meme". Now, it isn't too late to rectify your error! With these simple steps, you can redeem yourself int he eyes of your internet peers. 1) ctrl + w :)
twitch chat
December 2019

I am a sub with cash

twitchquotes: Hey you poor, underage trash. 🗑️ You know what the symbol next to my name means? Means I am a sub. Means I am a VIP. Means I got cash. 💵 What you got? You got shit. 💩 You poor non-sub trash ought to pay me and my sub-bros some respect. 💯 We subbed because we have cash. 💵 Real life jobs, real life credit cards.
twitch chat
May 2019

plebs vs subs

Sneaky and Meteos fan fic

twitchquotes: "zach, i can't do this anymore!" meteos cries from his side of the bed. sneaky's eyes widen in shock at the sudden outburst "w-what do you mean, will?" "i'm tired of being your side piece," he cries, "i want to be your one and only." the younger man's face flushes. "will," he starts. "i love you." he digs through the night stand and pulls out a ring. "will you marry me?" "yes!" meteos cries out with joy. he plants a kiss on his lover's cheek, full of tenderness. they are pure passion incarnate.
twitch chat
July 2020
Sneaky

Sneaky can you take me on a date?

twitchquotes: Sneaky this has been on my mind for a long time and i just don't know how to articulate it into words but i'll try. Your cosplays really turn me on and i was wondering if you would take a fellow furry on a date some time (you can even beat me if i'm naughty ;)) I think we would just really hit it off and i would really enjoy licking your cute little cheeks xD. I would love to recieve your seed and nut so we can produce some hybrid furry/cosplaying babies. It would really change my whole life ^_^
twitch chat
May 2019
Sneaky
I used to be a real ad

With love from me, your dad, to you, my son

twitchquotes: Sebastian Fors, I think it'll be hard for you to take this in but here go. I've wanted to write you this message since the day you started streaming. Though I'm not happy how you act here, roleplaying and god knows what while streaming. But you know that I will allways love you. I'm coming to dreamhack this summer and I'll finally get to meet you. If you remember your mother, Hafu, you will understand why leaving you with her was my only option... I have not been the greatest father... but I'll allways love you and care for you. Even though people call you a roleplayer I will allways protect you. WIth love from me, your dad, to you, my son. - Trump
twitch chat
December 2014
Forsen

Rainbow 6 copypastas have to be among the worst I've seen in any esport

twitchquotes: Also, Rainbow 6 copypastas have to be among the worst I've seen in any esport. People spam garbage over and over until eventually the mods get fed up and clamp down on spam. I don't blame them for it. Get creative and stop ruining twitch chat for everyone
twitch chat
August 2020

The Rumor Come Out: Does MoonMoon is Gay?

twitchquotes: The Rumor Come Out: Does MoonMoon is Gay?MoonMoon is gay is the most discussed in the Twitch in the few years ago. Even it has happened in 2016, but some of the Twitch still curious about what is exactly happening and to be the reason there is a rumor comes out about his gay. At that time MoonMoon became the massive social networking rumor. The Twitch, especially his chat are shocked. MoonMoon just came out with his bad rumor which is spread massively.
twitch chat
January 2018
MOONMOON

KappaPride

What's that?

twitchquotes: "Octavian," weeps a heartbroken Rania, "we need to talk. I'm not happy anymore. Your frail, vegan body no longer satisfies me. I asked you for a child, and all you gave me was this mangy mutt. Well, I've got news for you. I'm pregnant, and I bet you know who the father is. That's right, it's Tanner from Foot Locker. I'm leaving you, Octavian, you've ruined everything. Do you have anything to say for yourself?" Kripp lifts the headphone off his ear and glances in Rania's direction. "What's that?"
twitch chat
May 2019
Kripp

Hello Moonman or whatever your name is

twitchquotes: Hello Moonman or whatever your name is, I just wanted to tell you to please stop ruining my chat experience with these "smugs" and "smegs" and what not. Honestly, I find them absolutely infuriating to see in every chatroom I stumble upon. Fuck that dumb purple lady.
twitch chat
November 2019
MOONMOON
I used to be a real ad

Saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.

Weird fact: the Easter Bunny was the source of a significant amount of theological debate during the 1200's, as Catholic philosophers debated why God would create a creature in a constant state of labor (and thus suffering). The Catholic Church ultimately resolved this question by declaring that the Easter Bunny orgasmed every time it laid it an egg (which it was doing constantly). This is now codified in Canon Law (the legal code of the Catholic Church and much of Europe in the pre-modern era) and saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.
April 2022

Holiday

Easter

Hey Caleb, I'm Yoshinori Kitase do you remember me

twitchquotes: Hey Caleb, I'm Yoshinori Kitase do you remember me, I'm the director of that game you really enjoy, FFVII. I'm here, sitting in my damn fcking good sofa on the Square Enix headquarter, laughing at your fcking face because you even can't finish Big Shoes category. Still remenber the last E3, the boys haved a lot fun looking your face after we don't enouncement FFVII remake. Stop be a fcking loser and speedrun that fcking Big Shoes category, damn guy.
twitch chat
May 2019
Calebhart42

I'm a teacher but I'm treated like I'm a streamer

twitchquotes: I'm a teacher, middle school ages, we have a gaming club in our school. Most of the kids are vocal about watching Twitch, who their favorite streamers are and when playing games the would suggest who to watch to get better at a game, e.g. watch Hashinshin to improve at League etc. Now when the kids come to the gaming club they no longer ask about games, they all just chant 'Miss, get your tits out, get your tits out, get your tits out for the lads' or 'Miss, I'll pay you a dollar to show me your feet' or 'Miss, how much too see your butthole' or 'Miss, I'll gift 50 subs if you get your tits out now' or 'Miss, the lads need those big juicy milf titties out' or 'Miss, get your tits out or I'll bring a gun to school tomorrow'. It's getting a bit tiresome, will Twich Tv ever do anything about this epidemic?
twitch chat
April 2021

What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie?

What the heck did you just flipping say about me, you big meanie? I'll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Tiny Tots Program, and I've been involved in numerous secret raids on the girl's bathroom, and I have over 300 confirmed noogies. I am trained in Nerf warfare and I have the most gold stars in the entire kindergarten class. You are nothing to me but just another butthead. I will beat you the heck up with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my dang words. You think you can get away with saying that baloney to me on the glowy type-box? Think again, doodiehead. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of teachers across the USA and your parents are being called to pick you up right now so you better prepare for the spanking, junior. The spanking that wipes out the dumb little thing you call your playtime. You're in big darn trouble, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can wedgie you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed fartfights, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States PTA and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your dorky bottom off the face of the playground, you little poopypants. If only you could have known what serious punishments your little "smartypants" comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your goshdarned tongue. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're paying the price, you silly doofus. I will spray boogers all over you and you will cry about it. You're frickin grounded, buttmunch...
August 2021

Navy Seal

(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?

gullin15 is the best streamer

twitchquotes: gullin15 is the best streamer
twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
Text-to-Speech Playing