I’m not trying to be an asshole. Think about this before answering.
Atheists … what if you die and you find out it is all real? God, the Bible, Jesus, death on a cross, resurrection … all of it. What then?
I used to be a real ad
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How I got into Harvard
Many people always ask me how I was able to get into Harvard as a 16 year old who skipped 3 grades of high school. They think I got in because of my scholarly records, but no the key is the interview.
As I sat in the Harvard Dean's office in front of the board of reviewers for my application, the Dean asks me "Why should you be a good candidate for this school?" They seemed bored but I replied "Well I was born a child prodigy, placed 1st in my state spelling bee for three consecutive years, I can speak eight different languages not counting Latin, play four different instruments, I skipped grades 4 through 6, and graduated my high school as valedictorian at the age of 14. I then worked as an intern at both Telsa, and NASA." Suddenly the room burst into laughter and many of board instantly started scribbling down "No" near the application check marks. The Dean says "Sorry but you are just not the type we are looking for." But then I said "Excuse me but I wasn't finished... I watch Rick and Morty" The Dean looked at me like an idiot and said "So....?" Then I replied with a smile "And I understand all the references and subtle jokes" An audible gasp let out by the board was so loud the secretary had to come in. You could hear a pin drop and then suddenly all at once the entire board clicked their pens on the "Approved Box" and I was instantly handed a diploma and now I'm teaching advanced physicals there. I guess you can say I'm pretty smart. 
Rick and Morty
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SIMP SUMMER IS OVER
twitchquotes:
SORRY SLUTS‼️😤🌞SIMP SUMMER🌞IS OVER🙅🏻♀️🚫YOU BETTER FUCK OFF 🏃🏼♀️BECAUSE NO ❌SIMP ❌SEPTEMBER HAS ONLY JUST BEGUN👌🏻🙏🏻 YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS 👀😳 LOOKS LIKE THE 🍗TURKEY🍗 ISNT GETTING ANY SLURPY 🌧 TONIGHT🌚‼️ PREPARE 🤞🏻UR PUSSIES 👉🏻👉🏻FOR A DRY SPELL ☀️ CAUSE ITS TIME🕑 FOR THE BOYS 😤💪🏼TO FOCUS 👀 ON THEMSELVES 😇YOU SLUTS BEST SAVE YOURSELVES FOR THAT GOOD DICK🙌🏻🍆 SEND THIS TO 7️⃣ OF YOUR BIGGEST HOES👯♀️TO LET THEM KNOW YOU'RE READY😎FOR NO ❌SIMP❌SEPTEMBER👏🏻👏🏻
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The tragedy of Darth Kripparian the Salty
twitchquotes:
Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Kripparian the Salty? I thought not. It’s not a story the streamer would tell you. It’s a Salt legend. Darth Kripparian was a Dark Lord of the Salt, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create salt… He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he couldn't even keep the cards he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be salty.
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