I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
I used to be a real ad
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Silence Liberal
βββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
βββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
βββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
βββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββββ
Pewdiepie is being held captive by T-Series
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βATTENTIONβ οΈ9οΈβ£YR OLDSπΆπ», WE NEED UR HELPπ£! PEWDIEPIEπΈπͺ IS BEING HELDπ‘CAPTIVEπ BY βΏT-SERIESποΈAND CAN ONLY BE RELEASEDπ IF U SMASH π¨THAT SUBSCRIBE π
±οΈUTTONππ»ANDππ» TURN ON THE BELLπ! TIMEπ IS TICKING, LETSβ³βοΈ π€π»BRO FIST T-SERIESπ€π» AND GET THE EPIC π₯VICTORY ROYALπ©π©π°
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Emoji Pasta
This is so small to read even for you bro
twitchquotes:
α΅Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ αΆ¦Λ’ Λ’α΅ Λ’α΅α΅αΆ«αΆ« α΅α΅ Κ³α΅α΅α΅ α΅α΅α΅αΆ° αΆ α΅Κ³ ΚΈα΅α΅ α΅Κ³α΅β
α΄°α΅αΆ°α΅ α΅Κ³ΚΈ α΅α΅ αΆα΅αΆ°α΅αΆ¦αΆ°α΅α΅ Κ³α΅α΅α΅αΆ¦αΆ°α΅ α΅Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΅α΅αΆα΅α΅Λ’α΅ ΚΈα΅α΅Κ³ α΅ΚΈα΅Λ’ Κ·αΆ¦αΆ«αΆ« Λ’α΅α΅Κ³α΅ α΅α΅ Κ°α΅Κ³α΅ Λ’α΅α΅αΆ° αΆ¦αΆ ΚΈα΅α΅ α΅α΅αΆ°α΅ Λ’α΅α΅α΅β
α΅Κ°ΚΈ α΅α΅αΆ°α΅ ΚΈα΅α΅ Λ’α΅α΅α΅οΉβ
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α΅α΅ α΅Κ·α΅ΚΈ α΅Κ³α΅ α΅αΆ°α΅ Κ³α΅α΅α΅ α΅Κ°α΅ αΆ°α΅Λ£α΅ αΆα΅α΅ΚΈα΅α΅Λ’α΅α΅β
Λ’α΅α΅α΅ Κ³α΅α΅α΅αΆ¦αΆ°α΅ α΅αΆ«Κ³α΅α΅α΅ΚΈοΉ α΄΅ Λ’α΅α΅ α΅Κ°α΅α΅ ΚΈα΅α΅ α΅α΅αΆ°α΅ Κ·α΅αΆ°αΆ°α΅ α΅αΆ¦α΅α΅ α΅α΅ Κ³α΅α΅α΅αΆ¦αΆ°α΅οΉβ
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Κ·α΅αΆ«αΆ« α΅α΅, ΚΈα΅α΅ Κ·α΅αΆ° α΅Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΅αΆ¦α΅α΅, α΅α΅α΅ ΚΈα΅α΅ Λ’Κ°α΅α΅αΆ«α΅ αΆα΅α΅ΚΈα΅α΅Λ’α΅α΅ α΅Κ°αΆ¦Λ’ α΅αΆ°α΅ α΅Κ°α΅αΆ°α΅ α΅α΅ αΆ α΅Κ³ Κ·α΅Λ’α΅αΆ¦αΆ°α΅ ΚΈα΅α΅Κ³ α΅αΆ¦α΅α΅ α΅αΆ°α΅ Λ’α΅Κ³α΅Λ’Λ’αΆ¦αΆ°α΅ ΚΈα΅α΅Κ³ α΅ΚΈα΅Λ’ α΅Κ°α΅
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Kripp
I finally did it. I out-pizza'd the Hut
I finally did it. I out-pizza'd the Hut. It was the greatest mistake of my life.
After years of perfecting my recipe, I made my way down to the local hut, fresh-baked pizza pie in hand. "Try this," I told the kid working the counter. He did, and he had to agree that it was better than anything Pizza Hut had to offer. Soon, the entire store, customers included, was feasting on my delicious pie. The manager walked over, grabbed a slice, and took a bite. I look at him, anticipation rising. This was the boss, the local fief lord of the Hut. His approval meant more to me than all the rest combined. He took a bite and nodded. "I'll be damned," he said, "you really did it. You out-pizza'd the Hut. Shame." Shame? What did he mean by tha- the manager pulled a gun out from behind his apron and shot the nearest customer in the head. "We have a Code JalapeΓ±o," he said into his wrist as he executed the remaining customers. "I repeat, we have a Code JalapeΓ±o." The ground was slick with blood. The kid working the counter choked out his dying breath as the manager turned to me. "You just had to do it motherfucker. You just had to out-pizza the Hut." He shoved the gun in my face. I was too scared to fight, too scared to run. The manager pulled the trigger.
A click. The gun was empty. I threw a chair at the manager and scrambled out of the Pizza Hut, not even bothering to see if my missile hit its mark. I was closely pursued by the manager, who had gotten his hands on a deadly sharp pizza cutter. I suspected in his hands it would cut more than pizza. Somehow, I was able to get into my car and speed off, the manager cursing my existence as I left him behind. I took a deep breath. The manager was clearly psychotic. Yes, that was it, just a crazy man with a gun. It had to be. My phone rang. Sister. I picked it. "They're dead, she sobbed. They're all dead. M-mom, dad, Chris, Bill. Dead. They killed them all." I could barely understand her, so great were her sobs. "What do you mean? Where are you?" I asked urgently. "How is this possi-" a single gunshot sounded through my phone's speakers. Silence. Then, I heard a man's voice. "No one out-pizzas the Hut." He hung up. I drove down the empty county road, mind blank. I had nothing. They killed my family. I was alone.
At that moment I knew what I had to do. They took everything from me. Well then, I would take everything from them. Pizza Hut was so terrified of being out-pizza'd, they forgot there's one thing worse than a man with a recipe: A man with nothing to lose. I'll give them a limited time offer they won't be able to refuse: two bullets for the price of one.
With a free side order of pain.
Dude, your donger is showing!
twitchquotes:
(Κα©Κ') Dude, your donger is showing (Κα©Κ')
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Kripp