[Copypasta] I hate taking shits

I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks. TL;DR I hate shitting
April 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
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Chibi Leona

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⡜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⣟⣛⣛⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣿⡜⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⣧⠄⠄⠱⡘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠉⠄⠄⠘⣿⠇⠄⠄⠉⠱⢻⣿⡟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣧⣝⡲⢤⠄⠈⠢⡹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠄⠄⡀⠄⠄⢠⠶⢄⠄⠄⠄⢀⢀⠘⢱⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣱⢄⠄⠈⠬⡛⢻⠟⠄⢰⠄⠄⠘⣃⣶⣘⣿⣈⣼⣷⣄⠄⠈⠁⠸⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⢣⣀⠄⢡⠈⢀⠄⠸⠇⠄⣴⠿⡿⣻⣿⣿⣿⠟⢛⡓⡄⠄⠄⠈⠋⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⠾⠯⠔⡴⠺⡠⠾⢛⢁⣴⣶⣿⢈⣿⠿⢿⣔⠿⠂⡙⡆⡀⡀⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣬⠍⣁⢣⣀⠇⠰⣷⣸⣮⣭⣶⣿⣧⣛⣸⠻⢿⡇⠓⡁⢃⠌⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠼⢛⣱⣷⠄⠙⢿⣷⡬⢙⡛⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠷⠁⡟⠄⠄⡆⣉⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠉⠐⠄⠙⣼⡛⠿⠟⣴⠌⠄⠻⢦⣤⢃⢠⣄⠳⣝⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⢁⡄⢰⣷⠸⠈⠐⠆⠆⠂⢁⣻⠄⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠓⠘⣿⡄⢻⡆⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⠄⢹⡌⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⠄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠄⢐⠸⣧⠘⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⢻⡆⠈⣷⢹⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣶⣦⠄⢀⡄⠉⠒⠬⡅⣿⠄⠻⣤⡀⠄⠄⣾⠇⢠⠏⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⢃⢠⡾⠁⠄⠠⠁⠄⠈⠑⢦⣈⠙⢶⣴⠏⠄⠎⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢣⡿⣾⠇⠄⠄⠄⢹⠄⠇⢹⠄⣈⡓⣄⡈⡈⣴⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣜⠇⣿⠄⠘⠋⠂⠊⠢⢴⠊⠈⠈⠁⠁⣄⠄⣤⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣯⣤⠄⠄⡀⢰⣶⣶⣶⣦⠂⡀⠄⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣈⠒⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠨⠮⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2021

League of Legends

Flex your Dongers for Harambe

twitchquotes: ᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗ Flex your Dongers for Harambe! ᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗ Flex your Dongers for Harambe! ᕦ༼༎ຶ_༎ຶ༽ᕗ
twitch chat
August 2016

Harambe

May I, a woman respecting and feminist-supportive male

May I, a woman respecting and feminist-supportive male, see at least one breast from you my queen? I do not mean to come on as an improper male, and if this request disturbs you, please make me aware. You, my queen, deserve the utmost respect of any female. However, many of my gender seem to sexualize women and view them as sex toys. However, my Queen, I do not share these views. Rather, I value the female spectrum of the human race as the superior, and I, a respectful male, request for the viewing of an isolated, singular breast from your body. I await your response my Queen.
May 2021

Simps

Batman Amogus Crewmate

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣶⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⡿⠋⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⠁⠀⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠻⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⡿⠀⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠁⣿⡻⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⠱⠆⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣼⣽⣯⣻⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⢿⣿⣷⣦⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⠏⢹⡀⠀⠀⠀⢢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣷⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⠀⠈⣷⡀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠒⠒⠒⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⡇ ⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠈⠳⣦⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣤⠴⠞⣿⣿⡿ ⠀⣾⣿⣿⠋⠀⠀⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠁⠸⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠁⠀⠀⢀⣼⣿⣿⠃ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢹⠻⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠿⣽⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣻⣉⡉⣿⣿⣿⠄⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣩⣿⣿⡿⠟⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣮⣹⢧⣿⣿⣿⡃⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⠁⠉⢉⣹⡏⠉⠉⠉⡙⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⠉⣹⣿⣌⣩⣿⡏⠉⣽⠝⢻⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣷⠀ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⡇⢀⡀⠀⣿⡿⠷⠶⠶⠶⣶⠟⠉⢉⢉⠙⠙⠻⣾⣦⣴⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⠀ ⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠉⠉⠙⢻⡇⠀⠶⠤⡏⡇⠀⢤⠀⠀⣯⠠⠄⢈⣉⣁⣀⠷⢸⡏⠉⠀⢹⠀⠀⠀⠁⣿⡏⠀ ⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣀⣀⣀⣸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣶⣾⣷⣶⣿⣦⣤⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣿⣤⣬⣤⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀ ⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣤⣾⣿⠃⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠛⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠉⠀⠀
May 2022

Among Us / Amogus

You notice a wall of text in twitch chat

twitchquotes: You notice a wall of text in twitch chat and your hand instinctively goes to the mouse. You scroll up to stop the chat elevator and read the pasta, indulging in its delights... You soon realize that this pasta conveys no information nor is particularly witty or funny. Nevertheless, you drag your mouse across, hit Ctrl+C, then Ctrl+V and press Enter
twitch chat
March 2016

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing