I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
In Japan, heart surgeon
Number one. Steady hand. One day, yakuza boss need new heart. I do operation. But mistake! Yakuza boss die! Yakuza very mad! I hide fishing boat, come to America. No English, no food, no money. Darryl give me job. Now I have house, American car and new woman. Darryl save life.
My big secret. I kill yakuza boss on purpose. I good surgeon. The best!
Classic
My eyelids are heavy
twitchquotes:
My eyelids are heavy 
Im starting to dream you know what this tells me? its a qtpie stream
Im starting to dream you know what this tells me? its a qtpie stream
twitch chat
imaqtpie
Let's. Make. Some. Pasta.
twitch chat
Reynad
Among us crewmate with hat
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Among Us / Amogus
Travis Scott Burger
I have a theory about the Travis Scott burger. I think it’s a sham. It’s all a multi million dollar misinformation campaign. McDonalds has been hurting for a new supply of beef due to the Covid 19 pandemic. With all of the meat processing plant closures, they had to look elsewhere to get their precious beef for the ever so hungry American. They needed a new supplier. This has to be nobody other than Travis Scott. You see, since marrying Kylie Jenner, he had access to all of her cosmetic company’s animal testing plants. It was easy for Travis to get ahold of meat... it was too easy. Travis knew McDonalds was desperate for new meat, so he struck while the iron was hot. Through a swift negotiation, he had the multi billion dollars corporation by the balls, the sweet sweet balls. Travis agreed to supply them with the meat, only he lead them to believe it was coming from cows when in reality he was harvesting the animals from the animal cosmetic testing lab. In exchange, he got his name on the McDonalds menu. All for what? Now you may be wondering how I came across this info. And you may be wondering who sent you this information. It was Cactus Jack. Cactus Jack sent this info.