I hate taking shits. Taking shits is the worst function of the human organism after sex. You have to sit on the most uncomfortable seat ever, then you have to go through so much pain to push the shit out of your asshole (not to mention sometimes they get stuck in there). And as if those weren't enough then you have to wipe, you have to take your hand along with toilet paper and shove it up your asshole, this process can sometimes take minutes out of your life, it fucking sucks.
TL;DR I hate shitting
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
New positive chat with kripp'
twitchquotes:
γ½(ββΏββΏ)οΎ β βThis guy's deck is well chosen!β β "He had the skill and the heart of the cards!" β βHe drew into one of many possible cards that could beat me!β β "He drafted well, played well!" β βI gave the game my best, and that's all that matters!β β βIf I'm lucky, we can have another game soon!β γ½(ββΏββΏ)οΎ
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
This Copypasta Is CRAZY!
ResidentSleeper pyramid
twitchquotes:
only real 
er can build this perfect pyramid . Try like me !Try like me ! Try like me !! And my pyramid still higher!!!!!!
er can build this perfect pyramid . Try like me !Try like me ! Try like me !! And my pyramid still higher!!!!!!
twitch chat
Lying about service dogs
I work in a restaurant. We only allow dogs in if they are service dogs. If anyone comes in with any dog I ask;
βIs it a service dog?β
With a big wink to give them the opportunity to lie to me making it obvious I want them to.
If at first they say βnoβ I reply with βare you sure? This dog here? Sure looks like a service dog to me. Are you sure this is not a service dog?βwith another big wink
Always works.
I love dogs
Kripp at Blizzcon
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripp, not sure if you remember me. I sat 3 rows behind you at Blizzcon 2014. I know I will never be a front row pro like you, but I want to let you know that your big head ruined me and my boyfriends experience. I know $200 might not be a lot to you, but I didn't spend $200 to watch the back of your head absorb the front part of your hairline, so next time, scoot over, k?
twitch chat
Kripp
Reacting to content takes skill
twitchquotes:
Reaction when done right is a true artform. The sheer effort, persistence and dedication it takes for someone to master the craft is astounding. The skill and talent of the contestants on masterchef pales in comparison to the skill and talent of the true master watching them, pausing at the precise moment to achieve the pinnacle of comedy by releasing gas audibly from his colon. It is truly exhilarating, even a little arousing, to witness a true master of reacting at work.
twitch chat