[Copypasta] Daily WSB trader routine

1. Wake up 2. Check memfolio, buy more PLTR calls 3. Shit while looking at charts, don’t wipe 4. Fomo and buy the top 5. Watch stock Plummet 6. Sell, watch stock go up 7. Go to WSB and downvote everything 8. Jerk off, nut, realize how empty you are 9. Stare at futures for 3 hours 10. Sleep & repeat
December 2020

WallStreetBets

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I’m a simple guy

I’m a simple guy. I don’t know about all these fancy β€œfinancial instruments” or β€œmarket dynamics” or β€œwhere the clit is.” I like the stock, I buy the stock.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Apple announces an EV program

Oh boy I can't wait until 2024 when I can wake up to my Apple Homepod Siri alarm and check my Apple Watch for notifications and take a shower in my Apple Big Douche then put my makeup on before work in my Apple Mirror then take my Apple Car to my job at Apple Phone Plant #584 so I can work on my Mac Pro workstation designing the latest Apple Product the iShit smart toilet that syncs with your iAsshole to sense when you have a massive log brewing in my large intestine and sends me a notification to my apple colonoscopy bag. Russian hackers will know what I had for dinner.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Graham Stephen is stingy

Graham Stephen the kind of guy that suck his own pp and cum in his own mouth to save tissue
December 2020

WallStreetBets

NOT. SELLING. GAMESTOP.

🦍 🍌 🦍 🍌 🦍 🍌 🦍 🍌 🦍 🍌 🦍 🍌 NOT. FUCKING. SELLING. πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ NOT PRESSING β€œSELL” ON 1. FUCKING. SHARE. πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 I’LL GO TO $0.00 BEFORE BILLIONAIRES GET ONE MORE PENNY FROM US. πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ CAN’T STOP. WON’T STOP. GAMESTOP. πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 TOMORROW, I THINK I’LL BE HOLDING THE LINE. MAYBE MAKE SOME TENDIES, TOO. πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ I’LL SEE EVERY ONE OF YOU BEAUTIFUL APES ON PLUTO SOON, AND IT’S GOING TO JUST BE A SEA OF SPARKLING DIAMOND. πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 πŸ’Ž 🀚 I LOVE YOU, ALL, AND I’M NOT SELLING, AND I’M NOT FUCKING LEAVING. NOT ONE. FUCKING. SHARE!!! πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€ πŸš€
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Fuck you all, I’m never listening to this sub again.

Yesterday I said we’d see a rally like we’ve never seen before I was ridiculed and the market went down this morning so I accepted defeat and sold my nvda calls and got tesla puts. My account is down bad right now. I also hedged with a tesla call so hopefully I’ll make something. Somehow oil also tanked. Fuck you all. I’m only listening to myself now. You’re all retarded and so am I for listening to you. Edit: not sure why some of you degens think I’m blaming you. Of course it’s my fault. This is a shitpost update. Stop taking it so seriously you retards See you tomorrow
March 2022

WallStreetBets

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