[Copypasta] Bloomberg terminal vs toilet trading

Imagine spending 20K on a bloomberg terminal and thousands on hardware just to get smoke checked by some retards on the toilet trading on their phone that are not only on the spectrum but might be the actual spectrum.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/k9pwht/daily_discussion_thread_for_december_09_2020/gf5o23w/
I used to be a real ad
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Team Bull vs Team Bear

Team Bull Jerome "We print it digitally" Powell Elon "TSLA stonk too low imo" Musk Nancy "Stimulus talks going well" Pelosi Donny "Stop the count" Mango Janet "Unlimited QE bitch" Yellen Lisa "Su Bae" Su Ryan "Make Gamestop great again" Cohen ------------------------------------------------------------------------ VS ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Team Bear Jeff "No stock split to keep the poors out" Bezos Mitch "Stimulus talks not going well" Mcconnell Steven "Discontinue the PPP" Mnuchin Andrew "PlTr PrIcE tArGeT $10" Left Tim "Don't call me by my slave name" Apple Michael "I'm publicly shorting TSLA" Burry Warren "I fought in the Civil War" Buffet Which team will win? Team Bull or Team Bear? Load up on weeklies for a ticket to the pay per view hell in the cell match. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ Special Guests: That one JPM analyst with TSLA 90p 12/18 Life savings SPCE calls guy Jim "FUCK ROBINHOOD" Cramer
December 2020

WallStreetBets

GME bank consultation

Short story-time for amusement reasons only: some days ago, I went to my bank (Austria). I am the owner of quite a number of GME shares and my broker app is actually just the bank-intern bond trading app, where I need to pay transactional feed everytime I buy (what is sell?) GME shares. I informed myself about the reasoning of those transactional fees beforehand and found out that by paying them, I have the right of consultation by my bank about the shares theyβ€˜re trading/Iβ€˜m buying. So, I went to the main national building of my bank, they were really friendly at the beginning, enthustiatically, I mentioned GME to them and that I wish for professional consultation about the financial details involved with that stock (I am not a financial guy, actually, I donβ€˜t exactly know whatβ€˜s going on, itβ€˜s all pretty crazy to me). Suddenly, their posture and mimick changed pretty suddenly. I was told, they are not allowed to consult about GME. To my question, why this was the case, they told me, because GME is β€žtoo irrelevant for the big stock marketβ€œ. They are β€žaware of the past short squeeze, but one should no longer focus on GMEβ€œ. They acted as if GME was some β€žchildish financial playgroundβ€œ that should be forgotten about. When I confronted them with the huge recent naked short attacks and if they could explain to me possible effects of them if they were not covered, they just repeated themselves how β€žGME is not relevant, please focus on stocks like Apple or Amazon to be safeβ€œ. I left the bank, buying more GME shares.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

HODL

πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ•πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ”πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ—πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ’πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ“πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ•πŸŒ–πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘ πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘πŸŒ‘
ascii art
February 2021

WallStreetBets

Bear King Burry vs TSLA

Bear King Michael Burry in the ring, slappin TSLA with a metal chair. His glass eye open wide with rage as he batters TSLA relentlessly. "The valuation..." crunch "makes...." crunch "NO.... " crunch "SENSE!" he roars with maniacal autistic glee. TSLA struggles for the edge of the ring, but coughs blood as each hit lands, and eventually stops moving. Bear King Burry drops the chair. Bear King Burry turns to the crowd "Was this your champion!? Was TSLA supposed to be your chosen one!?" A child in the crowd turns his face into his mother's side and cries. On the side of the ring WSB can barely move. TSLA was supposed to tag them in, but couldn't make it to the side in time. "Get up TSLA" WSB whimpers hopelessly, a single tear rolling down their cheek. "Get up..." Bear King Burry turns to WSB "Now it is your portfolio's turn. Get in here you little bitch." "Excuse me." Someone replies from behind BKB. "I believe I can give you the fight you want." A robed figure is administering smelling salts to TSLA. The figure puts TSLA on its shoulder and carries TSLA gently out of the ring. "And just who the fuck do you think you are?" BKB rumbles ominously. BKB's fingers squeeze so tightly on the chair that metal bends. "Who am I?" the robed figure inquires. The robed figure stands straight and stretches to their full height. They must be at least 7' tall. The crowd stops crying and watches in stunned silence. "Who am I?" The figure repeats menacingly. The figure turns around to face BKB, ripping off his robe. A gleaming light fills the stadium. Before us stands a Golden deity, rippling with muscle. If there is an ounce of body fat it is currently in hiding, only to make way for seemingly endless coiled golden musculature. The figure looks directly into Bear King Burry's eyes. "I'm Goldman Sachs, and i'm here to kill you."
December 2020

WallStreetBets

Not financial advise

I'm starting to think the people telling me to buy BB at $20 were being serious about not being financial advisors
April 2021

WallStreetBets

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