[Copypasta] Tesla is undervalued

Currently Tesla share price is only valued for the next 200 years but studies have shown that Earth will survive another 1 billions years before the Sun dies out. Thus You don't have to be genius to figure out Tesla is heavily undervalued and it's current value factors in only the very short time. I am kinda retarded to be able to do the math but trust me it's heavy money. Factor in the when Zuckenberg calls in his species and that planet will be another market for Tesla that's more clients for Tesla and it will sky rocket. Get in before it's late
January 2021

WallStreetBets

What happened to this ad? :(
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How traders politely decline the second date

I discovered recently if I am on a date and I’m not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They won’t ask for another one then, I won’t have to politely decline.
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Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise?

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WallStreetBets

Am I The Asshole for not being able to trade options for my dad? I’m 6.

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WallStreetBets

Am I The Asshole?

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WallStreetBets

MSFT Infinite Money Glitch 🚀🚀🚀

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WallStreetBets

Classic

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