[Copypasta] Atheists … what if you die and you find out it is all real?

I’m not trying to be an asshole. Think about this before answering. Atheists … what if you die and you find out it is all real? God, the Bible, Jesus, death on a cross, resurrection … all of it. What then?
June 2022
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More Copypastas

PJSalt = Hs²

twitchquotes: Albert Einstein was desperate. He tried to prove that the luck of Kripp's opponents was within the laws of mathematics. Critics laughed claiming bad luck is divine punishment for embracing casualness. On his deathbed, he spent his last seconds jotting down the most famous formulas, PJSalt = Hs²
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

Not funny I didn't laugh

Not funny I didn't laugh. Your joke is so bad I would have preferred the joke went over my head and you gave up re-telling me the joke. To be honest this is a horrid attempt at trying to get a laugh out of me. Not a chuckle, not a hehe, not even a subtle burst of air out of my esophagus. Science says before you laugh your brain preps your face muscles but I didn't even feel the slightest twitch. 0/10 this joke is so bad I cannot believe anyone legally allowed you to be creative at all. The amount of brain power you must have put into that joke has the potential to power every house on Earth. Get a personality and learn how to make jokes, read a book. I'm not saying this to be funny I genuinely mean it on how this is just bottom barrel embarrassment at comedy. You've single handedly killed humor and every comedic act on the planet. I'm so disappointed that society has failed as a whole in being able to teach you how to be funny. Honestly if I put in all my power and time to try and make your joke funny it would require Einstein himself to build a device to strap me into so I can be connected to the energy of a billion stars to do it, and even then all that joke would get from people is a subtle scuff. You're lucky I still have the slightest of empathy for you after telling that joke otherwise I would have committed every war crime in the book just to prevent you from attempting any humor ever again. We should put that joke in text books so future generations can be wary of becoming such an absolute comedic failure. Im disappointed, hurt, and outright offended that my precious time has been wasted in my brain understanding that joke. In the time that took I was planning on helping kids who have been orphaned, but because of that you've waisted my time explaining the obscene integrity of your terrible attempt at comedy. Now those kids are suffering without meals and there's nobody to blame but you. I hope you're happy with what you have done and I truly hope you can move on and learn from this piss poor attempt
September 2019

Classic

Seven flamestrikes is not a FREE TO PLAY deck

twitchquotes: Kripp, how can you even PRETEND that you are playing with a FREE TO PLAY deck when yours has seven flamestrikes? I thought this stream was newbie friendly, well apparently I was mistaken. For the sake of ***. Unsubbed, unfollowed and unremembered. Bye, Kripp.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Pro players that go to tournaments are not the best

twitchquotes: The "pro" players that go to tournaments and stuff are NOT the best players in the world, not even close. These are just the best players of the type of losers who have the personality deficiency that compels them to actually go to gaming tournaments.
twitch chat
April 2019

Kripp's streaming checklist

twitchquotes: *stretch* ☑ "mmmm kay" ☑ "yeah alright" ☑ "fuckin A" ☑ "if he drew anything else I would've won" ☑ "how's this guy SO LUCKY?" ☑ "TOPDECK FLAMESTRIKE, YEAP" ☑ "topdeck into topdeck into topdeck, yeah that's how you get 12 wins guys" ☑
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing