Vladimir Putin had a private screening of Morbius at the Kremlin. Rumor has it when he walked out, he burst into tears, called up his top generals, and ordered a full withdrawal of Russian troops from Ukraine. He then flew to Kyiv and personally signed a peace treaty with Volodymyr Zelenskyy, pledging the Russian ruble equivalent of $500 billion to the Ukrainian people to help repair damages caused by the war. When asked why he had this sudden change of heart, Putin responded “I have encountered the Morb, and he has Morbed in my heart. I now believe we must all allow ourselves to be Morbed for the sake of world peace.”
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More Morbius Copypastas
MORB
⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⡿⠋⠁⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢠⠀⠀⢿⣿⡟⠀⢠⠀⠀⠀⣿⡿⠀⠀⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⢻
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢸⣇⠀⠈⡿⠀⠀⣼⡆⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⢸
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⣿⡄⠀⠈⠻⢿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠁⠀⢀⣾
⣿⣿⣀⣀⣸⣿⣧⣀⣀⣀⣿⣿⣇⣀⣀⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣴⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⢨⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠘⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀⠀⠘⢻⣿⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
Morbius
I LOVE MORBIUS
⠀⠀⢰⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠸⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⢀⣀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠟⠉⠉⢻⣧⠈⣿⣇⠀⢠⡿⠀⢸⡏⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⠘⣿⣀⣾⠇⠀⢸⡿⠛⠛⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⣿⣤⣤⣤⠀⠻⣷⣤⣤⡾⠏⠀⠀⠹⣿⡟⠀⠀⢸⣷⣤⣤⣤⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⠀⣠⡾⠿⠿⢷⣄⠀⣿⡿⠿⠿⣷⡄⠀⣿⠿⠿⢿⣦⠀⢸⣿⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⣶⠿⠿⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⡿⣿⡀⣾⢸⣿⢠⣿⡇⠀⠀⢘⣿⡄⣿⣧⣤⣤⡾⠃⠀⣿⣦⣤⣾⣟⠀⢸⣿⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠻⣷⣦⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⢸⡇⢹⣷⡇⢸⣿⠀⢿⣇⣀⣀⣸⡿⠀⣿⡇⠈⠻⣷⡀⠀⣿⣀⣀⣀⣿⡇⢸⣿⠀⢿⣇⡀⣀⣿⠀⠰⣦⣀⢀⣹⡗⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠘⠃⠈⠛⠁⠘⠛⠀⠀⠙⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠙⠃⠀⠀⠙⠓⠀⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠀⠘⠛⠀⠈⠙⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠉⠛⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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⠀⠀⢀⣠⡴⠾⠃⠘⠛⢀⡿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠛⠿⣦⣄⡀⢀⣀⠉⢻⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠁⠈⠻⠶⠿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Morbius
Coming out as morbsexual
If Morbius has a trillion fans
When I was 13, I came out to my parents as a Morbius male.
When i was 13, i came out to my parents as a morbius male. They couldnt accept my morbality, so they sent me off to camp. They just didnt understand— i was morbed that way. At the camp, they gave us electromorb therapy to morb us into beta males. I resisted the treatment, being a morbius male, you cant morb me out of being morbed. I fooled the counselors into thinking they had successfully morbed be into a beta male, and i returned home. To this day, i live a double life— one for my parents, who still cannot accept morbality, and one where its always morbin time.