[Copypasta] A dirty joke from the 1400s...

A dirty joke from the 1400s... In Florence, a young woman, somewhat of a simpleton, was on the point of delivering a baby. She had long been enduring acute pain, and the midwife, candle in hand, inspected her secret area, in order to ascertain if the child was coming. “Look also on the other side,” said the poor creature, “my husband has sometimes taken that road.” From “The Facetiae Or Jocose Tales of Poggio”, a joke book published in the 1400’s by Poggio Bracciolini
May 2022
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Hey chat, here's a high five for you

twitchquotes: (◞≼◉ื≽◟ ;益;◞≼◉ื≽◟) ╭∩∩∩∩∩╮ HEY CHAT HERE'S A HIGH FIVE FOR YOU (◞≼◉ื≽◟ ;益;◞≼◉ื≽◟) ╭∩∩∩∩∩╮
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Christmas for a wsb trader

As the tree blinks from white to red to green, you look at the void under the tree that previously held presents. Fewer this year than usual, but some. How did you get here? Boredom? In March, you felt trapped with your wife and infant. You needed something to pass the time. Something you could throw yourself into fully. “Are you coming to bed?” your wife yells down the stairs. It seemed harmless at first, but as the pandemic drew on, so did your investment. You’ll stop soon, though. “Soon!” you reply, and you hear her feet climb the steps. The lights start to blink chaotically. You cringe because you could only afford the junk strands at CVS. Suddenly they halt—the alternation feature broken—on red. The red fills the room and covers your flesh. You look down at your hands, and they look like they’re bleeding. Like your calls. After a time—hours?—you realize you’re sitting in complete darkness. Your lights have expired, worthless.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

MaSsan is an anagram for Assman

twitchquotes: ༼ ◔ ͜ʖ ◔ ༽ MaSsan is an anagram for Assman ༼ ◔ ͜ʖ ◔ ༽ ༼ ◔ ͜ʖ ◔ ༽ MaSsan is an anagram for Assman ༼ ◔ ͜ʖ ◔ ༽
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MaSsanSC

Kripp's high time in coma

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is doctor Jeffrey Shih from the Athens General Hospital. You’ve been in a coma for several years now due to an overload of copypasta. I’m trying out a new method to get through to you. Please wake up! Your family misses you very much. Please wake up, you *** retard!
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Tesla is restarting production today

twitchquotes: Tesla is restarting production today against Alameda County rules. I will be on the line with everyone else. If anyone is arrested, I ask that it only be me.
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May 2020
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