Criminal is escape gulag in Siberia. Enter hut that isn’t belonging to. Find peasant couple. Tie to stool. After tie peasant woman, he climb top, kiss neck. Go to shithole.
While criminal in shithole, peasant man say, This man escape gulag. Is probably capitalist. Is lusting of woman like other capitalist. I saw he kiss neck of the you. If he is desirous of scandalous act, resist not. Be surrender like fascists in Stalingrad. Is probably danger. If is angry, murder all. Have strength, be product. Is love!
Peasant woman respond, he not is kissing neck. Is whispering in ear. He say is liking to stick schalinski in holes of men. Think you look good. Ask if we are having any lard. I told, is in shithole. Have strength, bee product. Is love too!
Criminal never return. Starved at shithole due to lack of potato. Fifteen years is long time to be without potato. Peasant couple couldn’t build communism due to being tied to stool. People’s Army Patrol rescue them. Is great happiness! Then sent to gulag due to failure to build communism. Carcass of criminal also sent back to gulag, made to work. Is no mercy for traitors of the motherland.
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas
Potato harvest is bad. Play Hearthstone in Amerikanski
twitchquotes:
My name Dimitri Baryshnikov. I grow up in small farm to have make potatos. Father say "Dimitri, potato harvest is bad. Need you to have play porfessional game in Amerikanski for make money for head-scarf for babushka." I bring honor to komrade and babushka. Sorry for is not have English. Plz no cykapasta
twitch chat
Kripp
Reynad became his final form, the Reynoodle
twitchquotes:
Reynad layed in his bed. Something just wasnt right. He felt cold and uncomfortable. He needed something, but what? He went out to the kitchen to see if he could find something to do the trick. On the top shelf he found it. He laid back in bed and poured the spaghetti sauce all over his noodle body to keep warm for the night. Reynad became his final form, the Reynoodle. 
twitch chat
Reynad
Can the mods ban us all?
twitchquotes:
can 
the mods ban us all
the mods ban us all
twitch chat
MODS
Classic
I hate Stuart Little
twitchquotes:
I fucking hate Stuart Little. I know what you're thinking, this is some kind of funny joke, but no, Stuart Little is a piece of shit. A god damn rat got picked over actual children at an orphanage and he's supposed to be a hero? And I can't even tell you how many damn times I've seen a great parking space only to turn the corner and realise Stuart Little is already parked there in his stupid little fucking convertible.
twitch chat
