[Copypasta] Reacting to content takes skill

twitchquotes: Reaction when done right is a true artform. The sheer effort, persistence and dedication it takes for someone to master the craft is astounding. The skill and talent of the contestants on masterchef pales in comparison to the skill and talent of the true master watching them, pausing at the precise moment to achieve the pinnacle of comedy by releasing gas audibly from his colon. It is truly exhilarating, even a little arousing, to witness a true master of reacting at work.
twitch chat
December 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Bush outdated, Obama overrated, Hillary eliminated

twitchquotes: Jebaited BUSH OUTDATED Jebaited OBAMA OVERRATED Jebaited HILLARY ELIMINATED Jebaited TRUMP CONGRATULATED Jebaited LONG HAVE WE WAITED Jebaited NOW WE EMIGRATED Jebaited
twitch chat
November 2016

2016 US Election

I am not a viewbot. I am a normal chatter in Kripp's chat

twitchquotes: MrDestructoid I am not a viewbot. I am a normal chatter in Kripp's chat. This is not suspicious at all. Great play Kripp! You're the best! MrDestructoid
twitch chat
September 2015
Kripp

Viewbots

Kripp. It's Morpheus from future talking to you

twitchquotes: Hello ĸrιpp, ιт’ѕ мorpнeυѕ ғroм ғυтυre тalĸιng тo yoυ. ι нave 2 cнoιceѕ ғor yoυ, вlυe pιll or red pιll. вlυe pιll вrιngѕ yoυ lιғe, woмen, cнιleттe, dog, caт, cнιld, caѕυalιтy and no vιewerѕ. red pιll вrιngѕ yoυ nolιғe, oj, no dιѕтracтιonѕ ғroм oυтѕιde world, pro ѕтaтυѕ and vιewerѕ. cнooѕe wιѕely мιѕтer ĸrιpperѕon.
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

There was nothing I could do but donate

twitchquotes: ☑ “These Hafu nudes are CRAZY!” ☑ “My dick can't stay limp against nudes like that” ☑ "She NEEDED precisely those two nips to win" ☑ “She took the only nudes that could make me beat off” ☑ "She had the perfect muff" ☑ “There was nothing I could do but donate” ☑ “She cried profusely"
twitch chat
October 2014

Response to "go fuck yourself"

What if I'm already fucking myself? Behind this simple insult hides a universal paradox that may put your sexuality in question. Let's do a simple thought experiment: imagine us two standing in front of each other. I, of course, am wearing a pair of jeans, that are covering my genitals and my butt. You then command me to "go fuck myself". I may be fucking myself already. I may as well not be fucking myself already. Until my dick and its position relative to my ass is observed, it is simultaneously in my ass, but also outside of it - thus, it stays in superposition. The moment you lay eyes on my penis, both states collide with each other and become either one. You may have already guessed what the problem here is. As soon as a single photon reflected by my dick enters either one of your eyes, you become gay. The only way to avoid this is to not observe my penis. But if you don't look at it, then you will never know if your insult had any effect, thus rendering it meaningless. Since you have already made the insult, you are now, too, in superposition - you're either wrong, or gay. It's unfortunate, really - you dug a hole for yourself without even knowing it. All you can do now is accept it, and learn from your mistakes.
April 2020

Classic

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