[Copypasta] I want to fuck myself!

Now before you guys assume, i am not gay. I was messing around with a selfie of myself on faceapp and decided to use the female filter. As soon as i clicked the icon, my life was changed forever. Those lusious lips, the well defined jawline, the adorable eyes and those perfect eyebrows instantly gave me a hard on. Before i knew it, i was stroking my cock faster than i had ever before. Within 2 minutss i had already cummed 5 times coating my whole bed with a layer of semen and my balls were drier than the shaharan desert. Could any of you nerds please find a way to bring my waifu to lifue. Thanks uWu.
September 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Our most powerful technique - Submode

twitchquotes: "You are Anakin no longer, but Darth Vader. Rise my young apprentince," says Palpatine to the new Darth Vader. "My master, can you teach me how to resurrect the dead through the force?" asks Vader. Trump smirks, "In time, my apprentice, but first you must learn our most powerful technique - Sub Mode."
twitch chat
April 2015
Trump

BOB β€œYou’re doing GREAT out there!”

twitchquotes: BOB β€œYou’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. β€œI don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
September 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

The salt from your stream sucked the venom out of my wound

twitchquotes: Dear reynard. I was hiking in the Amazon Rainforest the other day when I was bit by a snake. Miles from the nearest city, I thought my life was over as the venom slowly spread across my body. But then I used my 4G to open twitch and the salt from your stream sucked the venom out of my wound and saved my life. Thanks Reynad!
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

Think about your actions

twitchquotes: I have noticed that, although this subreddit has 179,776 readers, I am not receiving 179,776 upvotes on my posts. I'm not sure if this is being done intentionally or if these "friends" are forgetting to click 'upvote'. Either way, I've had enough. I have compiled a spreadsheet of individuals who have "forgotten" to upvote my most recent posts. After 2 consecutive strikes, your name is automatically highlighted (shown in red) and I am immediately notified. 3 consecutive strikes and you can expect an in-person "consultation". Think about your actions.
twitch chat
September 2018

Classic

NaM emote

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–ˆβ–„ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–“β–“β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–„β–„β–’β–“β–„β–‘β–ˆ β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–ˆβ–€β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–„β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–“β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–„β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–„β–’β–“β–‘β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
October 2018
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