[Copypasta] I want to fuck myself!

Now before you guys assume, i am not gay. I was messing around with a selfie of myself on faceapp and decided to use the female filter. As soon as i clicked the icon, my life was changed forever. Those lusious lips, the well defined jawline, the adorable eyes and those perfect eyebrows instantly gave me a hard on. Before i knew it, i was stroking my cock faster than i had ever before. Within 2 minutss i had already cummed 5 times coating my whole bed with a layer of semen and my balls were drier than the shaharan desert. Could any of you nerds please find a way to bring my waifu to lifue. Thanks uWu.
September 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Ben Shapiro goes to the movie theatre

let's say, hypothetically, that i went to the movie theater, and the movie i was watching happened to be three hours long. for the sake of the argument, i am about halfway through watching the movie, and i have to go to the bathroom. based on what's happening on screen, i can determine that an important scene is coming up, and that i need to see it if i want to understand the plot. what's stopping me from pissing in the drink cup they gave me for my dr. pepper? if i can do it quietly enough, no one is going to be able to notice what i'm doing, and, in my honest opinion, pissing in the drink cup is a much better alternative to using the bathroom, since i would've missed an important plot point had i chosen to do so. lastly, no one would have to clean it up afterwards, since it's all contained within the drink cup, which is meant to be disposed of after the movie anyways, and, as a result, will not affect the theater staff in any way whatsoever.
December 2020

Ben Shapiro

stop trying to talk japanese if you don't even know it

like the word ばか that means idiot in japanese, but the wannabe japanese idiots will always try to type those words in the romaji, they type "baka", i hate seeing shit like that, stop trying to talk japanese if you don't even know it :Z
June 2021

Weebs

you only go for the easiest most OP builds

twitchquotes: Hello, I've noticed that you only go for the easiest most OP builds, but you play them suboptimally. As a High Elo ( Plat III ) TFT player and a Certified TFT Coach, I could help you with a few of your mistakes, missplays. Hit me up, first hour is free!
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September 2019

League of Legends

ASS

July 2020

NSFW

Literally type any words between emotes and chat will copy

twitchquotes: 4Head Literally 4Head type 4Head any 4Head words 4Head between 4Head emotes 4Head and 4Head chat 4Head will 4Head copy 4Head pasta 4Head
twitch chat
January 2017
Text-to-Speech Playing