[Copypasta] So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a Red M&M cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing Red M&M’s wrapper and shoes. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as an M&M and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made mde feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my wrapper. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "It’s that kind of party." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter, can’t resist my chocolaty interior?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "I melt in your mouth, not in your hands!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'ms till Red M&M."
September 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

bears are fuk

I hate people saying bears are fuk or bulls are fuk. Stop saying that. It's very rude. Just say bears are fuk
December 2020

WallStreetBets

I have given in to the copy pasterino

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I have given in to the copy pasterino. From now on I will devote myself to replicating every text, every word so that it may live on forever and fill the hearts and souls of our fellow copy pasterino's! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

All Cops Are Sus (ACAS)

Instead of saying ACAB(all cops are bastar*ds) we should start saying ACAS(all cops are sus). Think about it, it's less offensive and it only shows that we think that a cop might be sus(suspicious) of something but not necesseraly guilty of it. It's the same thing in the popular game amogus with thinking that all red players are impostors really. This might sound stupid but hear me out. Statistically, every player regardless of their color has the same chance of being the impostor, yet, there is this social stigma that only red players are impostors. However, players of Amugus have developed this great system that will help them show their suspicion on someone without saying that they are the impostor(in case that they actually aren't). They say that someone is 'sus' so nobody gets their feelings hurt. We can apply this knowledge to the real world, right? If everyone can be an impostor in amongsus, regardless of their color, so can anyone be a bastard in real world, regardless of their task(job as some low inteligence individuals might call it).
April 2021

Among Us / Amogus

I am a Volunteer Twitch Moderator

twitchquotes: You have been reported. I am not a bot. I am a Volunteer Twitch Moderator. I do not have mod powers but my reports are taken seriously and those who get on my bad side tend to get banned in under 24 hours. I have numerous rules, which you may read in my post history, but 1 is the most important rule of all I am an officer in training, and I expect to be treated the same way I would be with my uniform and badge. Watch your back and get used to this face kiddo, you'll be seeing a lot of it.
twitch chat
December 2018

MODS

Lenny face brick wall

twitchquotes: ( ͡° ͜ʖ├┬┴┬
twitch chat
July 2019

Classic

Text-to-Speech Playing