[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
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Offline Twitch Chat

twitchquotes: wait people are still here? lol thats really weird. i was just gunna click on a vod to watch cuz a friend recommended it and saw you guys still sitting here when the streamer isnt even live. Honestly you guys need a life lmfao, sitting it a streamers chat all day wont make you feel better and it wont improve your chances of sleeping with her, not like you had any to begin with lmfao. you guys are just so pathetic. Later!
twitch chat
January 2021

If two virgins fuck...

If two virgins fuck and take each other's virginity, shouldn't they still have one each? Because, think about it... The definition of take is to capture and receive something, like, if little Bob got 10 dollars and I rudely took it from him, he'd most likely cry, but I'd also gain 10 dollars since I took 10 dollars from him, no? Shouldn't it be the same with virginity, but hopefully, just without the crying? You take a virginty and lose one in the process, so it should be plus-minus zero, I should still have one virginty left? So if I only fuck virgins, will I be a virgin forever? And can I have multiple virginities if I take from other virgins?
September 2021

Lucentbark summon quote

twitchquotes: 🌳 THIS 🌲 IS 🌴 NOT 🎄 YOUR 🌲 HOME 🌳 INVADER 🌲
twitch chat
May 2019

Hearthstone

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⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠋⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠻⣿ ⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⣰⡆⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣄⡈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⣿⣦⣄⣀⣤⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⡿⠃⠀⡾⠃⣰⠟⢠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡄⠈⢿⡀⠈⢿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⣄⣀⣀⣴⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⢀⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣷⣶⣾⣿⡄⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣶⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣴⣶⣦⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠀⠀⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⠀⠻⠿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠿⢿⣿⡿⠿⠃⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⢿⣿⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⠛⠲⠦⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⠴⠖⠛⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⢸⢧⣀⠀⢰⡇⠀⠈⠉⡏⠉⠀⢸⠀⠀⢀⣼⡇⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⣟⠀⠈⠉⣾⠳⠶⠤⣤⣧⠤⠴⢾⡗⠉⠉⠀⢇⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠉⠙⠻⠛⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⡏⠑⢶⣤⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⣷⣠⡴⠖⢻⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⠟⠋⠉⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
February 2021

Weebs

I hate JoJo

I fucking hate JoJo. Every subreddit I go through has a vermin-like underclass of JoJo fanboys. They all just have to say “iS THat A JOJo ReFErEncE??!!!1” on every fucking post that contains a single word that may have been used in the shitty comics. Oh, a suspicious link? Probably a rickroll. NOPE!!! They’ve ruined that, too! One of the oldest goddamn internet traditions shat on and ruined by JoJo fanboys. Thunder Cross Split Attack! So fucking funny, right? I’m wheezing! NO. SHUT THE FUCK UP. Nobody cares about your shitty comic series. Dio is a stupid character from a stupid comic series. I downvote every post and comment that mentions JoJo, out of pure bloodcurdling rage. I want to detonate a MASSIVE thermonuclear warhead right on top of whatever godforsaken studio publishes that stinking-pile-of-trash comic. Frankly, I don’t even care for the civilian casualties, either. At least they died for a good reason. Unlike JoJo fans, I actually contribute to the betterment of mankind, instead of spamming shitty references on the internet. Every JoJo fan that dies a slow, painful death is a win in my book. I have claimed over a dozen of them already, too. I annihilated their skulls with my fists. Their stupid ice attack didn’t do shit for them either. They dies like they lived, pathetic excuses for humans. I hope more people hear my message and declare war on JoJo. If nobody helps me, I will do as much damage as I possibly can before I die. Thank you.
February 2021

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

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