[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my ΓΌbernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant

twitchquotes: PogChamp only the chosen can ride this beautiful elephant RNCelephant
twitch chat
August 2016
Reynad

Pride month is over.

Pride month is over. pride month is over. All gay people instantly begin to spontaneously combust, trans people begin to morph into various citrus fruits and are sold as novelty items from a different time. Bisexual people are instantly split in half by the invisible blade of corporate disinterest and the non-bianries are legally banned from using the number 0 in any scenario. The pride flags and corporate twitter profile pictures are instantly detonated to make room for more advertisements, posters promoting diversity and inclusivity are ripped down and destroyed by once-inclusive teachers all across the country. and the price of lube decreases by an average of 76% worldwide. Pride month is over. Greed month is upon us. May all who savoured their taste of freedom, cower in the face of pure capitalism, and use the link https://nordvpn.com/superthrash767 when signing up to nord vpn...
July 2022

Team Solo Mid

β–’β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–’β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–‘β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–’β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–’β–β–ˆβ–„β–„β–β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–’β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–’β–β–ˆβ–„β–„β–’β–β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–β–ˆβ–’β–β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–ˆβ–Œ β–’β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–’β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–β–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–’β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–’β–β–ˆβ–„β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–β–ˆβ–„β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–’β–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘ β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–β–ˆβ–Œβ–β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–’β–β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–ˆβ–Œβ–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–β–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
January 2015

League of Legends

NAXXRAMAS expansion has been UNRELEASED

twitchquotes: ATTENTION: The NAXXRAMAS expansion has been UNRELEASED in order to make room for the Gnomes Vs. Goblins expansion. We apologize for any dongers raised by this message.
twitch chat
November 2014
Trump

Imagine complaining about aim assist

twitchquotes: Imagine complaining about aim assist when u have a WHOLE mouse and a WHOLE table and a WHOLE hand to move around to track a player , meanwhile controller players use A THUMB and ARE LIMITED TO MOVING , We can’t move our little analog stick ALL AROUND THE TABLE , complaining BOTS.
twitch chat
February 2019

Fortnite

Text-to-Speech Playing