[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

AYAYA NaM tank

twitchquotes: AYAYA █ █ ]▄▄▄▄▄▄▄ 💥 NaM ..............▂▄▅█████████▅▄▃▂ .............███████████████████] .............◥⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙▲⊙◤
twitch chat
July 2019

Weebs

TSM logo

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣴⣾⣿⠟⠋⠄⣠⡄⠄⣿⣿⠄⢠⣄⠄⠙⠻⣿⣷⣦⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⠋⠄⣠⣾⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣷⣄⠄⠙⣿⣿⣦⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⣾⣿⠟⠄⣠⣾⣿⠟⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡟⢿⣿⣷⣄⠙⢻⣿⣦⠄⠄ ⠄⣾⣿⠋⠄⣾⣿⠟⠁⠄⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣦⠈⢻⣿⣧⠄ ⣾⣿⡟⠄⣼⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠹⣿⣇⠈⢿⣿⣇ ⣿⣿⠁⢀⣿⣿⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿ ⢿⣿⣄⠄⢿⣿⣇⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⣿⠟⢀⣿⣿⠋ ⠈⣿⣿⣄⠈⢿⣿⣄⠄⠄⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⡟⠄⣼⣿⡟⠄ ⠄⠈⣿⣿⣄⠈⠹⣿⣿⣄⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⠄⠄⣴⣿⠋⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢻⣿⣧⡀⠄⠻⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⡇⠸⠋⠄⣠⣾⣿⠋⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣿⣿⣷⣄⣀⠈⠙⠃⠄⣿⣿⠄⠈⠁⠄⣴⣾⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
November 2020

I thought, I thought you streamed for me

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ, ᴛʜɪs ɪs ᴛʜᴇ ʟᴀsᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʟʟ ʙᴇ ʀᴇᴀᴅɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ᴍᴇ. ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ɴᴇᴡ ᴇᴍᴏᴛᴇs ʜᴀᴠᴇ ᴄᴏɴᴠɪɴᴄᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ʀᴇ ᴊᴜsᴛ ᴀɴᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sᴇʟʟ─ᴏᴜᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴅɪғғᴇʀᴇɴᴛ ᴛʜᴀɴ ᴛʜᴇ ʀᴇsᴛ. ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴠɪᴇᴡᴇʀs... ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ, ɪ ᴛʜᴏᴜɢʜᴛ ʏᴏᴜ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍᴇᴅ ғᴏʀ ᴍᴇ. ʙᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴀᴛ's ᴏᴠᴇʀ, ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ. ɢᴏᴏᴅʙʏᴇ
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Teaching him how to throw so well

twitchquotes: Hey xQc my son is a huge fan of yours. Anyway over the past few days of watching you play this game hes got much better at playing baseball (he plays in the 11-13 year old division). I just wanted to stop by and thank you for teaching him how to throw so well.
twitch chat
October 2018
xQcOW

Overwatch

Ninja Mixer announcement

twitchquotes: I know this may come as a shock to many of you, but, as of today, i will be streaming exclusively on Mixer. I know, i know, it's exciting. You know, i feel like this is a really good chance to get back in touch with my roots, and really remember why i fell in love with streaming in the first place.
twitch chat
August 2019
Ninja
Text-to-Speech Playing