[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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Anonymous (Guy Fawkes)

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February 2021

bro i’m more japan than you

twitchquotes: bro are you disrespecting my japanese culture bro i’m more japan than all of you because i watch anime and you don’t, i bet you don’t even know what Naruto is you degenerate. So before you message me acting like you know my culture maybe check yourself first
twitch chat
June 2019

Weebs

gachi hydra

⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡿⠁⣀⣤⣤⣄⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠁⣀⣀⡀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠁⢀⣟⣓⡲⣿⡡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⢠⣽⠿⢿⣿⣦⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣄⣘⣿⡟⡽⠾⠜⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⠫⡆⣿⣿⣭⣰⡟⢉⢺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡵⣿⣿⣿⣶⣬⡶⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢺⣻⣿⡟⡵⢿⡅⡇⣿⣿⠟⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⢧⣿⣿⣿⡿⣡⣿⣧⢻⣿⣮⣅⢗⣽⠋⢀⣄⡀⠄⠄⠹⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢱⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣿⣿⢋⣼⣿⣿⣿⠗⣬⣯⣵⣿⡧⢱⣿⢛⢿⣷⣦⣀⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⡿⢡⣿⣿⣿⡿⣣⣾⣿⡿⢟⣻⣅⣿⡷⣾⣟⣑⡮⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣧⢿⢧⣾⣿⣿⣿⣱⡿⢟⣭⣾⣿⣿⣿⢿⠒⡭⡞⠟⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡎⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣼⣿⣿⣿⣗⣩⣾⣿⣿⡿⢟⣛⣭⣭⣽⣯⣵⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⣩⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠛⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⣤⣶⣤⣄⡀⣼⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢽⣏⣩⡟⠛⠇⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣧⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣯⣭⣽⣾⡯⢛⣨⡿⣰⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣛⣛⣛⣱⣊⣴⣿⣿
July 2019

KappaPride

Kripp tenderly slid back the wrapper of the card pack

twitchquotes: Kripp tenderly slid back the wrapper of the card pack. His fingers were soft and smelled faintly of cucumber. He slowly pulled out the card, caressing it with his fingers. "I didn't expect it to be so big", he said as he looked at the 7/7 stats. "And only 4 mana?" he said and moaned softly.
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

Hey guys a little bit sick today

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper Hey guys a little bit sick today ResidentSleeper kinda tired cuz I didn't sleep well ResidentSleeper gonna be another short stream ResidentSleeper we're going to clear up some dallies on the free accounts first ResidentSleeper we'll do some arena later ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
October 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing