[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my ΓΌbernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Spiderman Logo

β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–β–Œβ”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–β–Œβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–€β–„β–Œβ–„β–β–„β–€β–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€ β”€β–β–ˆβ”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β–ˆβ–Œβ”€ β”€β”€β–€β–€β”€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β”€β–€β–€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–€β”€β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β”€β–€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€ β”€β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€ β–β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–β–ˆβ–Œβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–Œ β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€ β”€β–€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β–Œβ”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β”€β–β”€β”€β”€β”€
September 2021

Try being nicer when you say that Calvin

twitchquotes: Try being nicer when you say that Calvin so it comes across as constructive and less toxic that way you won't hurt anyone's feelings and everyone will be happy :)
twitch chat
October 2018
aimbotcalvin

Overwatch

My name is Andrey, but most of you know me as Reynad

twitchquotes: (β—‰ ΝœΚ– β—‰) Hello! My name is Andrey, but most of you know me as Reynad! (β—‘ ΝœΚ– β—‘) I just lost another tournament (ΒΊ ΝœΚ– ΒΊ) But it's okay, I'll be a whiny baaby and complain about my luck
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

Naughty fun

guys why when a woman gets a vibrator, its seen as a bit of naughty fun. BUT when a guy orders a 240 Volt FuckMaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating ***, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, together with optional built in realistic orgasm scream surround sound system, hes called a pervert?
April 2014

Classic

TSM and TL waiting for Fly at the airport

twitchquotes: HELLO FLY? πŸ“ž 4Head TSM HERE πŸ“ž 4Head WE FOUND TL AT THE AIRPORT MC DONALDS πŸ“ž 4Head WE ARE WAITING FOR YOU πŸ“ž 4Head WIFI PASSWORD 0-6
twitch chat
October 2020
Riot Games

League of Legends

Text-to-Speech Playing