[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my รผbernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Ghiaccio: You know Paris, France?

You know Paris, France? In English, it's pronounced "Paris" but everyone else pronounces it without the "s" sound, like the French do. But with Venezia, everyone pronouces it the English way: "Venice". Like 'The Merchant of Venice' or 'Death in Venice'. WHY, THOUGH!? WHY ISN'T THE TITLE DEATH IN VENEZIA!? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? IT TAKES PLACE IN ITALY, SO USE THE ITALIAN WORD, DAMMIT! THAT SHIT PISSES ME OFF! BUNCH OF DUMBASSES!
January 2021

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

YOU TOOK MY FORTNITE CARD

YOUโ€™RE ๐ŸŒฅ๏ธ SO SUSSY ๐Ÿ˜“๐Ÿ˜“๐Ÿ™Š๐Ÿ˜จ๐Ÿ˜ณ๐ŸŽต I ๐Ÿ˜€ KNOW ๐Ÿ’ญ YOU ๐Ÿ‘ˆ TOOK ๐Ÿ‘ซ MY ๐Ÿ˜ FORTNITE ๐ŸŽฎ CARD ๐Ÿƒ๐Ÿƒ I ๐Ÿพ KNOW ๐Ÿค” YOU ๐Ÿค– TOOK ๐Ÿคฏ MY ๐Ÿ˜˜ 19 โ— DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ฒ FORTNITE ๐Ÿ’ฉ CARD ๐Ÿ’ณ GIVE ๐Ÿšช๐ŸŒŒ๐Ÿธ ME ๐Ÿ‘ˆ MY ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿ˜ฃ 19 โ— DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ฐ FORTNITE ๐Ÿ’ฉ CARD ๐Ÿ’ณ๐Ÿ˜‘ YOU ๐Ÿ‘ˆ๐Ÿ˜ญ BETTER ๐ŸŽฐ GIVE ๐Ÿ‘น ME ๐Ÿ‘ฉ๐Ÿ’ก MY ๐Ÿฅณ 19 โ— DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ธ FORTNITE ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐ŸŽฎ CARD ๐Ÿ—ƒ I ๐Ÿ‘น NEED ๐Ÿ“ฒ MY ๐Ÿ”‘ 19 โ™ˆ DOLLAR ๐Ÿ’ต FORTNITE ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐ŸŽฎ CARD, ๐Ÿ’ณ NOW! ๐Ÿ“…
May 2021

Fortnite

Anime is art

Anime isn't just a bunch of cheap American ripoffs of cartoons, it's art. Next time you American sheeple are watching your simpsons or south park or whatever mindless American cartoons that have plots, storylines and comedy, I'll be Admiring the wonderful and superior art of Chinese cartoons.
December 2020

Weebs

Hello, trump supporter

Hello, OP. I've searched through your account history and see that you agreed with trump once back in 2017. As a redditor, and a good human, i have downvoted every post and comment on your account as far back as december 7th, 2013, on 5 different alternate accounts. I have reported every single post you have ever made. I hacked into reddit's serverbase and found out your IP address, real home address, and have constructed several bombs which are shipping there as we speak. I await your death, nazi.
August 2021

Donald Trump

First of all, I'm sick of the term "Weeb"

twitchquotes: First of all, I'm sick of the term "Weeb". I didn't study half a semester of Japanese history and do a google maps tour of Tokyo so that some uncultured swine would walk around calling me a weeb like its an insult. Japanese culture is my life, not some sort of past time you idiots. And yes, I will be visiting Japan for the first time next year when air travel costs go down.
twitch chat
June 2019

Weebs

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