[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my ΓΌbernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
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MingLee

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September 2020

Yet Another Among Us Crewmate

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
December 2021

Among Us / Amogus

I met a man named madlife

twitchquotes: Back when I was in korea, I met a man named madlife, and he came up to me and said "this is how you play thresh you young wippersnapper" and I stood up out of my chair and said "okay" and that, is how the american madlife, machinegunnerusmc was made.
twitch chat
November 2014
machinegunnerusmc

Angry Wojak / Soyjak comment

β €β €β ˜β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘œβ €β €β € β €β €β €β ‘β‘€β €β €β €β €β € ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⑔⠁⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ’β’„β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β£€β ΄β Šβ €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’Έβ €β €β €β’€β£€β£€β£€β£€β£€β‘€β €β „β ’β ˆβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β£€β „β Šβ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β‘ β ”β ’β ’β ’β ’β ’β ’β €β£€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘°β ‰β β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ‘β’„β‘€β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘Έβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘€β €β €β €β €β ™β „β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β’€β β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ƒβ €β’ β ‚β €β €β ˜β‘„β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β’Έβ €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ’€β‘€β’‚β €β’¨β €β’€β‘ β ˆβ’£β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β’€β’€β‘–β ’β Άβ €β ­β’½β£Ÿβ£—β ²β –β Ίβ£–β£΄β£†β‘€β €β €β Όβ‘„β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β ˜β‘ˆβ ƒβ €β €β €β ˜β£Ίβ‘Ÿβ’»β »β‘†β €β‘β €β‘Έβ£Ώβ’Ώβ’žβ „β‘‡β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β’£β‘€β €β‘€β‘€β‘”β ‰β£β‘Ώβ ›β “β Šβ β €β’Žβ ›β‘—β‘—β’³β‘β €β €β €β € ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⒱⠀⠨⑇⠃⠀Ⓕ⠁⑔⒑⠒⒀⠀⠀⑅Ⓓ⣿⒨⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀ β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β’Έβ €β  β’Όβ €β €β‘Žβ‘œβ ’β’€β ­β‘–β‘€β’­β£±β’Έβ’™β †β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β‘Έβ €β €β Έβ’β‘€β Ώβ ˆβ ‚β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘β‘β‘β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β €β €β’€β ‡β €β €β €β €β Έβ’’β£«β’€β ˜β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ β£Όβ‘β €β €β €β €β €β €β € β €β €β €β €β£€β£ β Šβ €β£€β Žβ β €β €β €β ™β ³β’΄β‘¦β‘΄β’Άβ£žβ£β£€β£€β‘€β €β €β €β €β € β €β β ’β ‰β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β  β €β’€β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β €β ˆβ ‰β €β €β €
March 2021

You have been warned!

twitchquotes: Excuse me but how dare you guys do this to me? Last week i wrote a beautiful story here on twitch chat and people just started stealing it and posting it as their own. If this continues i'll be forced to take action. You have been warned!
twitch chat
August 2018

I hate Twitch Chat

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