[Copypasta] I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today

I saw 1.9293948382% of a girl's shoulders today. I immediately fell to my knees, as the rush of dopamine caused my the impending earth-shattering orgasm started making me moan loud enough to deafen everyone in the immediate vicinity. What followed was a torrential downpour of every single sperm cell I ever have or ever will produce, shot out so hard that my dick was ripped apart by my übernut accelerating to 5% the speed of light by the time it left my urethra. It vaporized the girl as it punched right through her, barely slowed, before cutting through a structural support beam in the school as if it were a nuclear-powered angle grinder. The sheer weight of this historical nut, combined with the total destruction of everything in its path, caused the school to collapse, and every female in the state of New Jersey to fall pregnant with my children. When the final death toll was tallied, there were 146 deaths, 458 injuries, and over 4 million pregnancies. As I lay dying under the rubble of my high school, I rest easy, knowing every one of my sons will repeat my glorious actions.
August 2021
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More Copypastas

Take the ʕ•͡ᴥ•ʔ or the ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ

twitchquotes: ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽ Hey Kripp, You take the ʕ•͡ᴥ•ʔ - the story ends, you wake up in your bed and believe whatever you want to believe. You take the ヽ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ノ - you stay in Dongerland and I show you how deep the arena-hole goes. ༼ ▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ ༽
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Dex is Kripp's opponent

twitchquotes: "My apologies" Kripp's opponent emotes as he casts fireball on Kripp, ending Kripps arena run. "That guy was so lucky! He curved out every turn, had every answer and topdecked lethal!" Kripp sighs and loads up another arena run. His opponent closes his laptop and thinks "What a scrub. And now for the cherry on top" as his opponent walks out from the other room goes up to Kripp and licks Kripp's arm. "Good doggie" Kripp says "Here's a treat for a good doggie".
twitch chat
October 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

Mods, can you please confirm that this was an original photo taken by OP

Mods, can you please confirm that this was an original photo taken by OP, otherwise this post should be removed as per subreddit policy. There is no further context provided here, how do we know that they didn't find this picture somewhere else? This directly affects our enjoyment of the post.
May 2022

Reddit

I Am Very Smart

Hydra smile

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠛⠻⠿⠿⠋⣴⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⠙⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠟⣉⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⠒⠄⡟⠍⢻⣿⣿⠍⠛⠄⠙⣿⣿ ⣿⡿⢡⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠛⠛⠢⠄⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⣾⠄⣤⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣀⠻⣷⣌⣉⣉⣴⠿⣀⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⢰⣿⣿⣿⡏⢰⡟⣡⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⡀⣭⣭⣭⣥⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣧⠘⣿⣿⣿⣷⠘⠁⡟⠏⢻⣿⡟⠍⢹⡇⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣆⢻⠿⢋⣉⣤⡀⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣶⣾⡇⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⣠⣿⣿⣿⣇⠻⣧⣝⣛⣛⣭⡿⠃⣩⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣍⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⣶⣌⢉⣉⣉⣥⠞⢸⡿⠻⣿⣿⡿⠛⢿⠄⠿ ⣿⣿⠇⣸⣿⣿⣿⡄⢹⣿⠆⠙⣉⣡⣀⢸⣧⣠⣾⣿⣷⣤⣼⠄⣀ ⡿⠋⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢈⣤⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣟⠻⠿⠟⣻⣿⢸⣿ ⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢁⣬⡙⠿⠿⠿⣋⣵⣾⣿
May 2019

i play fortnite everyday, all day

twitchquotes: i play fortnite everyday, all day. without it, i wouldn’t be who i am today. fortnite is by far the best game ever in existence. if you don’t play it, then your obviously some broke, stupid piece of shit who doesn’t have a life. i am level 100 and have bought all the skins available at the moment. stop making fun of fortnite you assholes. i bet that you don’t even have a good skin or pickaxe you sad little cunt. you need to step your game the fuck up or else ill block you on every social media app my parents will allow me to have.
twitch chat
November 2018

Fortnite

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