[Copypasta] Horny during Space Jam 2

OK so I was watching space jam 2 and I got RANDOMLY horny. I didn’t wanna exit the movie so I just waited till the Lola scene came up. It came. I started JACKING the SHIT out my pecker. And then.. I ACCIDENTLY NUTTED TO LEBRON😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
July 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade (Portal)

When life gives you lemons, don't make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don't want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life's manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I'm the man who's gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I'm gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!
May 2021

Chika dance

⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⢀⣴⡾⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠺⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀⠄ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⡟⢀⣴⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷ ⢸⣿⣿⠟⣴⣿⡿⡟⡼⢹⣷⢲⡶⣖⣾⣶⢄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢸⣿⢫⣾⣿⡟⣾⡸⢠⡿⢳⡿⠍⣼⣿⢏⣿⣷⢄⡀⠄⢠⣾⢻⣿⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡿⣡⣿⣿⡟⡼⡁⠁⣰⠂⡾⠉⢨⣿⠃⣿⡿⠍⣾⣟⢤⣿⢇⣿⢇⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣱⣿⣿⡟⡐⣰⣧⡷⣿⣴⣧⣤⣼⣯⢸⡿⠁⣰⠟⢀⣼⠏⣲⠏⢸⣿⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡟⠁⠄⠟⣁⠄⢡⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣼⢟⢀⡼⠃⡹⠃⡀⢸⡿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟ ⣿⣿⠃⠄⢀⣾⠋⠓⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣾⣅⢔⣕⡇⡇⡼⢁⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢣ ⣿⡟⠄⠄⣾⣇⠷⣢⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣭⣀⡈⠙⢿⣿⣿⡇⡧⢁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢏⣾ ⣿⡇⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢻⠇⠄⠄⢿⣿⡇⢡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣼⣿ ⣿⣷⢰⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢰⣧⣀⡄⢀⠘⡿⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣼⣿⣿ ⢹⣿⢸⣿⣿⠟⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣭⣉⣤⣿⢈⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⣾⣹⣿⣿ ⢸⠇⡜⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣱⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⢳⠃⣿⣿⣿ ⠄⣰⡗⠹⣿⣄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⣅⣥⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠄⠄⣾⡌⢠⣿⡿⠃ ⠜⠋⢠⣷⢻⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⣛⣥⣾⣿⠿⠟⠛⠉⠄⠄
April 2019

Weebs

Your social credit score has increased

中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [5] Integers. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [100] Integers. You can now have priority transport and can now get into prestigious colleges! Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citzen! Your social credit score has increased by [500] Integers. You can now take up official, government job, where we pay you high salary, unlike America. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Citizen! Your social credit score has increased by [1000] Integers. We will ensure you get great salary, good benefits, and good social standing, no matter the means. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语]Copied! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Celebrity! Your social credit score has increased by [5000] Integers. You will be famous across mainland of China, for what you are currently doing. We will make you celebrity, and even better salary. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语] [ 中华人民共和国寄语] Great work, Celebrity! Your social credit score has increased by [10000] Integers. Xi Jinping would like to meet you personally at Zhongnanhai to encourage your good work. I am sure you notice that you have gained lot of dislike recently. Do not worry. We will send re-education vans to make sure your figure is in good graces. Keep up the good work! [ 中华人民共和国寄语]
October 2021

When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me

twitchquotes: When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me. I go down Kripp wet Kripp throat and am in warm Kripp stomach. Then I go deeper into the Kripp. I am made into Kripp gold. The Kripp sits on toilet and frees me. I am sad I am no longer Kripp food. Then Kripp eats me again.
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp

Classic

Hey, I noticed you were a female

Hello, I noticed you have a profile picture of a very beautiful (but also intelligent looking!) female, and I am under the presumption that this goddess is you? It is quite astonishing to see a female here in the Pakistan Official discord. I am quite popular around here in this server, so if you require guidance, please throw me a mention. I will assist you at any hour, day or night. And, before you are mistaken, I do not seek your hand in a romantic way; although I am not opposed in the event you are interested in me, as many women often are. I am a man of standard, and I do not bow to just any female that comes my way, unlike my peers... So rest assured that I will not be in the way of your gaming and socializing experience. Consider me a Player 2.. a companion, a partner, and perhaps we can enjoy some video games together some time. I see you play mini games? I am a mini-game aficionado, so I would be happy to assist you in games. Platonically of course, unless you (like many others) change your mind on that. I look forward to our future together (as friends of course.)
May 2021

Simps

Text-to-Speech Playing