[Copypasta] Horny during Space Jam 2

OK so I was watching space jam 2 and I got RANDOMLY horny. I didn’t wanna exit the movie so I just waited till the Lola scene came up. It came. I started JACKING the SHIT out my pecker. And then.. I ACCIDENTLY NUTTED TO LEBRON😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
July 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Kog'Maw's passive

twitchquotes: Hi Imaqtpie. I noticed that in your games you utilize Kog’Maws passive A LOT, but when I watch LCS players I see them go an ENTIRE teamfight without using their passive even ONCE. Are they playing the champion to its full potential or are you?
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

Classic

League of Legends

Mitochondrion is a double membrane-bound organelle

twitchquotes: The mitochondrion (plural mitochondria) is a double membrane-bound organelle found in all eukaryotic organisms. Some cells in some multicellular organisms may however lack them (for example, mature mammalian red blood cells). A number of unicellular organisms, such as microsporidia, parabasalids, and diplomonads, have also reduced or transformed their mitochondria into other structures. To date, only one eukaryote, Monocercomonoides, is known to have completely lost its mitochondria.
twitch chat
July 2017

I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire

twitchquotes: I remember a time when copypasta was biting satire and prophetic indictments of contemporary Twitch chat. Copypasta when I was a younger teenager had the potency to topple Nazi moderatorships and revolutionize new chat epochs. Even the truncation of "copypasta" to "pasta" shows a lack of eloquence that speaks volumes. If, like me, you are a product of those better times and wish to see them return then speak out. Let the memers and Toucans know that real copypasta back.
twitch chat
July 2015

MODS

Classic

My son won't stop using "TwitchSpeak?

My son (14) watches a lot of video game streamers on Twitch.tv. I personally don't find them entertaining but I can understand why some people (like my son) do. Over the past month he's starting using terms like "pog", "jabaited", and "Kappa" which I guess are terms that are used in the scope of Twitch. I don't have an issue with my son using these terms but it's gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. We were having dinner and my daughter (age 12) was talking about how she got accepted for a summer program with the local animal shelter, and my son said "Pog you, easy clap". I told him that it was getting out of hand and that he would have to communicate normally to his parents and family. To that he said "Weird champ, feels weird man, normies omega LOL." Until he learns to communicate like a normal human being I've blacklisted Twitch from the internet for the time being. He's hysterical now but I told him that I would unblacklist it if he stopped using twitchspeak, but he's refusing to stop so for now it's banned. AITA?
May 2019

Classic

Am I The Asshole?

Plague doctor / Black Scourge Singed

⣿⣿⣏⢴⢏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢹⣿⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠜⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿ ⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⣷⣞⣧⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣧⠾⣺⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣫⣤⣴⣦⣶⣾⣿⡦⠤⠀⠀⠤⠤⠤⠖⠒ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⢉⡀⣀⠀⢠⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠀⡃⠀⠀⡇⡜⠉⠙⠛⠓⠒ ⣿⠛⣹⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠐⠈⠙⢲⡊⡹⠳⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀ ⣿⣷⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠋⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡵⣁⣀⡀⠀⠉⠉⠙ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⠠⠀⠀⠀⠐⠀⣇⠀⠀⠉⠓⠲⢤⡀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⣀⣠⣤⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣶⣦⣤⣤⣬⡀⠙⢲⡄⠀⠀⠀⠈ ⣿⠟⣻⢿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠙⠢⣄⠀⠀ ⣿⣮⣯⣾⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠳⡄⠀⠀⠘⣦⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠀⠙⢲⠀⠀⠈⢳ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⣆⠀⠀⠈⠳⣄⠀⠀ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣔⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠙⡆⠀⠀⠀⠘⠷⢄
March 2021

Coronavirus

League of Legends

COVID

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