[Copypasta] Dear women who post nudes on reddit.

Stop with the fucking " I bet you'll never guess what's under my dress.." It's tits. It's always fucking tits. This is no mystery to anyone, and human anatomy has been the same for over 100k years. Seriously, shut the fuck up. You all do this. Do you really think your tits and asshole are so special that they're going to shift our collective consciousness or something? "I bet the guys at the gym wonder what's under my yoga pants." I bet they already know, and if they fucking don't, maybe you shouldn't be at a kid gym for 4 year olds.
July 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Hospitals

twitchquotes: If 700,000 people die in hospitals every year. Why don't we close down these hospitals and prevent those deaths? (つ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)つ
twitch chat
April 2015
imaqtpie

Dennis in a time machine

twitchquotes: The year is 1945. “Dennis,” Kripp speaks breathlessly into the night. “Get back to the time machine. We have what we need here.” A foul smirk plays upon his lips as he pockets a top-secret Nazi folder marked “Top Deck.” Lightning flashes and thunder crashes far across the German mountains. “We will see who says "Salt" now,” he says….
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion

twitchquotes: Kripparrian grabs Rania by the scruff of her delicate neck, thrusting her to the Hyper-X Ultra-White High-Def gaming chair. The Krippster's rightfully claimed woman presents her rose-hued folds to her master in submission. "Top deck me and #Shrek me, you Romanian stallion" Rania wails in passion. Kripparadino kicks Cattarrian aside, and towers over the chair, "I'm gonna play this perfectly." Kripp misses lethal.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Hearthstone

Drama Popcorn

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠟⠛⠛⠻⣦⣠⣤⣤⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⠋⠁⠀⠙⣿⠶⣶⣤⣤⣤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⡾⠿⠀⢠⣶⠟⠻⢷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠁⠀⠙⣷⡀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣟⠀⠀⢀⣿⣇⠀⠀⠀⢿⠟⠛⢷⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣿⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢠⡾⠛⠋⠀⢰⡟⠉⢻⣷⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡿⠟⠛⢷⡄⠀⠀⢹⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠸⣧⣄⡀⠀⠈⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⢿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠟⠀⣀⣾⠇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡻⢿⣷⣦⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⣶⣿⠿⣿⡷⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣇⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣄⡀⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⢰⣿⠇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⡀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⠙⠻⢿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢹⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⣼⣿⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⡇⠀⠘⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⡏⠀⢠⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⡆⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⣼⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⣿⡿⠀⢀⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣤⣀⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⣿⡇⠀⢰⣿⣿⡇⠀⣸⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠋⠀⠀⠈⣻⡿⠿⢷⣦⡀⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⣿⠀⢀⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣼⡿⠄⠀⠀⢰⡟⠁⠀⠀⢹⣷⣿⡇⠀⢸⣿⡏⢀⣸⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⣼⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⡇⠀⣾⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠸⣷⣄⣀⣠⣴⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣷⡿⠟⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠁⠻⠷⠶⢿⣦⣤⣴⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
April 2022

As I type this I have my modded PS2 running a track IP script on your post

You fucked up kid. As I type this I have my modded PS2 running a track IP script on your post. Once I have triangulated your position in the world, my PS3 will release to your router my very own Pandora box virus. You won't notice it at first, but soon your lame PC will begin to work against you in ways you can't even imagine. First your graphics card will start to emit the flu virus, your ram will be uploaded online so everyone will be able to use it, your motherboard will slowly secrete acidic resin which will fry the electronics. The processor will be fine, just to give you hope. You will be left with a husk of a machine, all because you decided to critique my mental ability... was it worth it? Not even your mummy can help you now fuck boy
January 2021

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