[Copypasta] I use Linux as my operating system

"I use Linux as my operating system," I state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. He swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision. "Actually", he says with a grin, "Linux is just the kernel. You use GNU+Linux!' I don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "I use Alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU Coreutils, or any other GNU code. It's Linux, but it's not GNU+Linux." The smile quickly drops from the man's face. His body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth and drops to the floor with a sickly thud. As he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!" Coolly, I reply "If windows were compiled with GCC, would that make it GNU?" I interrupt his response with "-and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. Even if you were correct, you won't be for long." With a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. He lies on the floor, cold and limp. I've womansplained him to death.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Rooster

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–Œβ–’β–’β–β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β—β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–„ β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€ β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–„β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–’β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€ ░░░░▐░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▀▄░░▀▄▄▄░▄ ░░░░▐░░░░▐▄▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▀▄░▄▄▀▀ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–„ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–Œβ–Œβ–„β–Œβ–Œ
February 2017

forsenE

Ⓒ⣿⠿⠛⠛⠿Ⓙ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣢⣾⣗⣂⑀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ Ⓒ⒀⣠⣀⣀⣄⠄⠉⠛Ⓙ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⑿⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ Ⓒ⣿⠫⒁β£₯⣀⣀⑁⠒⣀⣿⣿⣿⑿⠛⠻⣿⠿⠿⠙⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ β’Έβ£Ώβ‘‡β ›β ‰β β ‰β „β „β ˆβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ ƒβ „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ Ⓒ⣿⣢⣀①⠄⠼⠗⠄⒠⣿⣿⑿⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⒐⒛⠛β ₯β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£…β£β£€β£€β£΄β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ „β „β „β „β ˆβ£Šβ£β ‘β  β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β β „ Ⓒ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⑀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣿⣿⣢⣦⣀⣀⣀⣔⠄⠄⠄⠄ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ’‹β£½β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ‹β „β „β „β „β „β „β ˆβ Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ‰β β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ β£ β‘Ύβ ‹β ‰β β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β ˆβ ™β ‰β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£—β œβ ‹β „β „β „β£€β£€β£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β Ήβ£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ’»β£Ώβ£¦β£Όβ£·β£¦β£€β ­β β ‰β ™β ˆβ „β „β „β „β „β „β „β ˜β£·β‘€β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ „β£ β‘Ώβ’Ÿβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ÿβ ‰β ‰β ‰β ‰β “β ’β „β „β „β °β Šβ “β ‚β ‰β β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ£Ώβ „β „β „β „β šβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£β£ β£€β‘€β‘„β „β’€β£€β£€β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „ β’Έβ β „β „β „β „β „β Ήβ Ώβ’Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ώβ ›β ‚β Šβ ˆβ ‰β β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „β „
July 2019
Forsen

Emote

Kirby is the best character Ultimate has to offer

twitchquotes: Honestly? If you think about it, Kirby is the best character Ultimate has to offer. D-tilt trips even at high %, his specials allow for mind games and early kills, the list goes on. While a top tier character, he requires the player to have a diverse skill set and deep understanding of the game to play. He's an underplayed, underappreciated gem of the smash roster but unfortunately, I think that less competent players like Nairo have a long way to go before utilizing him with his full potential.
twitch chat
May 2019
NairoMK

Super Smash Bros

Our Greatest Gratitude for Your Invaluable Advice

twitchquotes: On behalf of the streamer and whole chat I would like to extend our greatest gratitude for your invaluable advice for this hardstuck challenger player, since he is never able to make proper itemization choices on his own! Your participation in making this channel and streamers game better, will never be forgotten!
twitch chat
May 2022

League of Legends

I hate Among Us

I can't fucking take it. I see an image of a random object posted and then I see it, I fucking see it. "Oh that looks kinda like the among us guy" it started as. That's funny, that's a cool reference. But I kept going, I'd see a fridge that looked like among us, I'd see an animated bag of chips that looked like among us, I'd see a hat that looked like among us. And every time I'd burst into an insane, breath deprived laugh staring at the image as the words AMOGUS ran through my head. It's torment, psychological torture, I am being conditioned to laugh maniacly any time I see an oval on a red object. I can't fucking live like this... I can't I can't I can't I can't I can't! And don't get me fucking started on the words! I'll never hear the word suspicious again without thinking of among us. Someone does something bad and I can't say anything other than "sus." I could watch a man murder everyone I love and all I would be able to say is "red sus" and laugh like a fucking insane person. And the word "among" is ruined. The phrase "among us" is ruined. I can't live anymore. Among us has destroyed my fucking life. I want to eject myself from this plane of existence. MAKE IT STOP!
February 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Text-to-Speech Playing