[Copypasta] McDonald's BTS Meal

So I was listening to my favorite boy band called 'BTS (I am an army)' on my Samsung earbuds (BTS Edition) using my Samsung Galaxy s20+ (BTS Edition) in my room plastered with BTS poster. Suddenly one of my Army friends (we are BTSSexual and BTSGender) told me that there is a McDonald's BTS meal which almost made me jizz my pants. I ran to McDonald's to buy the BTS meal and came back home. Even though I am an Army (I would have bought their feces if they were selling it), this is intolerable. That was the most uncreative meal ever created. I wish McDonald's would have put Ass-Hair of each members of the band and hidden it in Chicken McNuggets. Like "Hey! I got Jimins Ass-hair in my chicken nuggets! Can't wait to get Kim Teahyung's Ass-hair so I can take his DNA sample and recreate a clone of Kim Teahyung to overrule the world with #Army". bts #army #blm #gaypride #arianagrande
June 2021
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.

Weird fact: the Easter Bunny was the source of a significant amount of theological debate during the 1200's, as Catholic philosophers debated why God would create a creature in a constant state of labor (and thus suffering). The Catholic Church ultimately resolved this question by declaring that the Easter Bunny orgasmed every time it laid it an egg (which it was doing constantly). This is now codified in Canon Law (the legal code of the Catholic Church and much of Europe in the pre-modern era) and saying that the Easter Bunny does not orgasm with every egg laid is considered blasphemy and grounds for excommunication from the Church.
April 2022

Holiday

Easter

nature has molded females to become a holy being

nature has molded females to become a holy being. they must be worshipped at all costs. since they lack the barbaric y chromosome and testosterone, they are unaggressive and thus good people. they are prophets, they are guides. questioning them is foolish and expecting 💦 for free is blasphemy. i will protect women at all costs and sacrifice everything for them because even their motherhood is a natural wonder. simping is a way of life. it is worship. would you make fun of a muslim for praying? then don't make fun of me either
October 2021

Simps

Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, how's it going, Faeria Dev here. We noticed that your streams are interesting and entertaining. To fix this issue, we have decided to offer you money to play our very uninteresting and boring card game that is clearly a clone of Hearthstone. We look foward to future business with you and hope that you can sellout out a little bit more in the future. ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

LeBlanc

⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠒⠒⠲⠿⣿⣯⣭⣍⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠁⢲⣦⢮⡐⠊⠉⢱⣮⠀⠈⠃⢔⣢⣼⣿⣷⡦⠾⠦⠲⣶⣶⣉⣶⣶⣶⣶ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣤⣶⣤⣤⣍⣙⠻⢿⣿⣦⣄⡀⠀⠘⣿⡻⣿⣿⡟⠛⠙⠀⢀⣴⣿⡿⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⠨⡙⠿⣿⣶⣄⣿⣷⣿⠀⣮⠀⡀⢰⣿⡿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⢀⠔⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠳⣬⡻⢿⣿⣿⠃⣀⡼⠷⡽⣿⡟⠀⢀⡀⠀⢠⣥⣴⣶⣶⣦⣄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⠀⣰⡟⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢷⣽⣿⣜⢿⡇⠀⢰⡟⢀⠖⠁⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡇⣰⡿⢡⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠋⢻⣷⣕⢠⡿⠑⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⡈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢹⣿⢱⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡌⡠⠁⠀⢀⣤⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣍⠻⣿⢃⣶⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠈⠙⠿⣗⡀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢻⡧⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⢰⠃⠀⠀⠉⠛⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠃⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣷⢄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⡑⠄⠉⠻⢿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡀⠀⠀⠀⣽⣿⣿⣿⡀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠄⠀⡀⠀⠉ ⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠀⠓⠐⠒⣸⣄⣠⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣴⡇⠑⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠄⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣿⣷⣶⣶⣦⣰⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢸⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠂ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠻⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⡀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠦⣤⣑⠄⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠑⠂ ⡡⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠉⠀⠉⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠈⠙⠲⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⣿⠛⠁⠀⠀⢤⣬⣤⠀⠀⣈⠍⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠑⠲⢤⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠻⣿⣿⣷⣦⠀⠈⠉⠈⠀⠐⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠳⢤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣾⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⢦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⠢⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢹⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠳⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠳⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣴⣶ ⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣶⢆⣠⣴⣾⠿⠟⠛⢛⣿⣿ ⡌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⣶⡿⣫⠾⠛⠉⢁⣀⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⠿
September 2021

League of Legends

I cam I saw I came I saw

twitchquotes: I came 🏃 I saw 👀 I came 🏃 I saw 👀 I praise 🙏 the Lord 😇 then break 💥 the law 👩‍⚖️ I take 🖐️ what's mine 🙋‍♂️ then take 🖐️ some more 😌 It rains 🌧️ it pours ⛆ it rains 🌧️ it pours ⛆
twitch chat
August 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing