[Copypasta] WARNING: NEVER jerk of to TRAP PORN

WARNING: NEVER jerk of to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, it is a slippery slope! First yer jerkin it to a guy that looks a bit feminine, next thing you know? Yer in a pink miniskirt gettin ANALLY CREAMPIED and BUKKAKED by 4 cocks! I don’t even have 4 friends! And one of em thinks its a good idea to CUM IN YER HAIR does he KNOW how hard that shit is to get out? ITS FUCKIN HARD! I had to shower not ONCE, NOT TWICE, BUT 4 FUCKING TIMES, AND COMB MY HAIR FOR AT LEAST AN HOUR! Oh yeah, and despite what porn told me, CUM TASTES TERRIBLE, its far to salty, and less sticky as it is SLIMY. Yet again, NEVER jerk off to TRAPS, FEMBOYS, OR SISSYS, or you may end up like me.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
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This is agent Kappachino from the Kappa agency

twitchquotes: Hi this is agent Kappachino from the Kappa agency. I would like to inform you that we have detected the KPM (Kappa Per Minute) to be far below the minimum level of 100 KPM. Please fix this by typing Kappa or Kappa agents will be dispatched to donger this stream
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

Pressing random numbers as a form of camaraderie

twitchquotes: Do you losers get a joy out of having people press random numbers on their keyboard when you tell them to? Does it validate your pathetic life? This is why I hate twitch chat, bunch of anti-social weaboos pressing random numbers as a form of camaraderie. How about you actually start a conversation with one another instead of being weird, yes I'm srs.
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

You have been gifted free happiness

twitchquotes: β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€” TwitchVotes You have been gifted free happiness. Type widepeepoHappy to activateβ€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”β€”
twitch chat
September 2020

Never buy a keyboard off a chinese bidding website

twitchquotes: ᴺᡉᡛᡉʳ α΅‡α΅˜ΚΈ ᡃ α΅α΅‰ΚΈα΅‡α΅’α΅ƒΚ³α΅ˆ α΅’αΆ αΆ  α΅’αΆ  ᡃ αΆœΚ°αΆ¦αΆ°α΅‰Λ’α΅‰ α΅‡αΆ¦α΅ˆα΅ˆαΆ¦αΆ°α΅ ʷᡉᡇ˒ᢦᡗᡉ
twitch chat
November 2018

Sanic Hegehog

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–€β–β–„β–‘β–€β–β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–€β–ˆβ•β•β•β•β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„ β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–€β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–„β–€ β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
July 2015
Text-to-Speech Playing