[Copypasta] I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said

Hi there! My name is Michael Grover, and I am an explorer. Ever since I’ve been little, I’ve loved searching for new things. As a baby, my parents kept finding me in nooks and crannies around the house. “On the search” as they would say. By the age of 5, I had been to every continent on the planet, barring Antarctica. For my 12th birthday, my parents got me diving lessons, and by the time I was 13, I could scuba dive to a depth of 40 meters, as well as go cave diving. I got a pilot’s license by the age of 17, and I learned to sail just before my 18th birthday. Instead of going to university, I decided to travel around South America, exploring its rich jungles and beautiful landscapes. During my trip, I met my now wife who was also an explorer. For our honeymoon, we sailed around the Caribbean and we discovered 3 new islands which we named after the cats that I had growing up. Over the course of my life, I have come across great treasures and wondrous experiences. But in all my life, and in all my travels, I’m afraid I have never come across a single person who cared about what you just said.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

What makes me a good Demoman? Meet the Demoman

What makes me a good Demoman? If I were a bad Demoman, I wouldn't be sittin' here, discussin' it with you now would I? Let's do it! Not one of ya's gonna' survive this! One crossed wire, one wayward pinch of potassium chlorate, one errant twitch... and kablooie! I got a manky eye. I'm a black, Scottish cyclops. So T'all you fine dandies so proud, so cocksure! Prancin' aboot with your heads full of eyeballs! Come and get me I say!I'll be waiting on ya with a whiff of the 'ol brimstone. I'm a grim bloody fable... with an unhappy bloody end! Oh, they're going to have to glue you back together... in hell!
January 2024

Team Fortress 2

Program and Control Man

twitchquotes: We are all living in Pac-Man’s world. You know what Pac stands for? P.A.C Program and Control. He’s program and Control Man. The whole thing’s a metaphor. All he can do is consume. He’s pursued by demons that are probably just in his own mind.
twitch chat
March 2019

Super Smash Bros

Repeating yourselves like parrots

twitchquotes: Wow, you imbeciles are especially stupid tonight. Repeating yourselves like parrots, spouting puerile taunts at each other, using crude 'emoticons'... Can you even form SENTENCES? One day you'll all be too dumb to even type your 'dongers,' and then twitch chat can finally have some merit. Until then, I'll stick to the moderated streams..
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

I hate Twitch Chat

How to have sex and still be a virgin

You see if you have sex with another virgin you're therefore taking their virginity and they are taking your virginity so it's a win-win and you can still use Reddit
March 2021

3-eyed face

░░░░░░▄▄▄▄▄▓▓▓▄▄▄░░░░░ ░░░░▄▄▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▄░░░ ░░▄▄▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▓▀█▄░ ░▓▓▌▓▓▓░░▒▒▒▒▀(◐)▒▒▒▒▒█▓ ░▓▓▌▓▓░▒▒▓(◐)▓░░░▒▓▓(◐)█▓ ▓▓▌▓▓█▄█▀▄▄░▀░▀▄▄▀░░█░█ ▓▓▌▓▓▀▄█▄█░█▀▄▄▄▄▄▀██░█ ░▓▓▌▓▓░█░███▄█▄█▄███░░█ ░▓▓▌▓▓░█░███████████░░█ ░▓▓▌▓▓░█░███████████░░█ ░▓▓▌▓▓░█░███████████░░█ ░▓▓▌▓▓░▀▀█░█▀█▀█▀███░█ ░░▓▓▌▓▓░░░▀▀▄█▄█▄█▄▀░█ ░░▓▓▌▓▓▓▓▀▀▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▄▀
November 2014
Text-to-Speech Playing