[Copypasta] It can never be opposite day

It can never be opposite day. When ever you say "HEY IT'S OPPOSITE DAY!" the opposite would apply therefor it would not be opposite day. Also if you say "IT'S NOT OPPOSITE DAY!" the affect is not applied.
February 2021
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I am a muricunt born in America

twitchquotes: I am a muricunt born in america, the land of the fat and the free. I am proud of my awful education, horrible medical care, terrible society and religious gunwielding fanatics. With my natural 260 lbs, please stop talking trash about my mediocre country which is a collection of all the human scum EU and Asia dumped a few hundred years ago.
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

EU vs NA

Smash bros in the year 20XX

twitchquotes: The year is 20XX. Every official stream online has zero views because grassroots organizations have usurped all Esports streams. Nintendo is destitute and broke, their only source of income is through taxing sold copies of Melee, CRTs, and gamecubes. Society has evolved to the point that with a cybernetic implant, you can connect directly to netplay and shine on your opponent while broadcasting free of a DMCA complaint and a C&D letter from Nintendo. Doug Bowser is the last living human without an implant, and is found cold and naked, wondering why everyone is constantly talking about wavedashes.
twitch chat
December 2020

Super Smash Bros

Ultra EDM dance

twitchquotes: โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›โ”—(-_- )โ”“โ”—(-_-)โ”›โ”(-_-) โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›โ”—(-_- )โ”“โ”—(-_-)โ”›โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›โ”—(-_- )โ”“โ”—(-_-)โ”›โ”(-_-) โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›โ”—(-_- )โ”“โ”—(-_-)โ”›โ”(-_-) โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›โ”—(-_- )โ”“โ”—(-_-)โ”›โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›โ”—(-_- )โ”“โ”—(-_-)โ”›โ”(-_-) โ”(-_-)โ”“โ”(-_-)โ”›
twitch chat
March 2016
Ultra

Happy 420 emoji copypasta

April 2021

VapeNation

Emoji Pasta

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub

Jacked off in the shower while laying down in the tub -- shower water raining down from above. It was very nice and ended nicely. Later that day, I went to take a shit. Shit wouldn't come out, and I felt an odd tugging sensation between my ass cheeks. Thought I was dying and started freaking out while I tried to pinch my shit off to investigate. Turns out my jizz had found its way into my ass cheeks while laying down in the tub, mingled with all my ass hair, and solidified into a gelatinous plaster. Upon shitting, the hair was so fucked together that my cheeks couldn't separate for the shit to emerge (felt like that playdoh hair salon toy). I ended up having such a massacre of shitcum on my ass and hands that I had to get back in the shower just to clean off.
December 2020
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