[Copypasta] It can never be opposite day

It can never be opposite day. When ever you say "HEY IT'S OPPOSITE DAY!" the opposite would apply therefor it would not be opposite day. Also if you say "IT'S NOT OPPOSITE DAY!" the affect is not applied.
February 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

My son won't stop using "TwitchSpeak?

My son (14) watches a lot of video game streamers on Twitch.tv. I personally don't find them entertaining but I can understand why some people (like my son) do. Over the past month he's starting using terms like "pog", "jabaited", and "Kappa" which I guess are terms that are used in the scope of Twitch. I don't have an issue with my son using these terms but it's gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. We were having dinner and my daughter (age 12) was talking about how she got accepted for a summer program with the local animal shelter, and my son said "Pog you, easy clap". I told him that it was getting out of hand and that he would have to communicate normally to his parents and family. To that he said "Weird champ, feels weird man, normies omega LOL." Until he learns to communicate like a normal human being I've blacklisted Twitch from the internet for the time being. He's hysterical now but I told him that I would unblacklist it if he stopped using twitchspeak, but he's refusing to stop so for now it's banned. AITA?
May 2019

Classic

Am I The Asshole?

NA, aka 'No Achievements'

twitchquotes: NA, aka 'No Achievements' is the weakest region in the professional League of Legends scene. They are specifically known for their clown fiestas and never winning anything worthwhile in the history of League of Legends.
twitch chat
November 2019
Riot Games

League of Legends

EU vs NA

How I got into Harvard

Many people always ask me how I was able to get into Harvard as a 16 year old who skipped 3 grades of high school. They think I got in because of my scholarly records, but no the key is the interview. As I sat in the Harvard Dean's office in front of the board of reviewers for my application, the Dean asks me "Why should you be a good candidate for this school?" They seemed bored but I replied "Well I was born a child prodigy, placed 1st in my state spelling bee for three consecutive years, I can speak eight different languages not counting Latin, play four different instruments, I skipped grades 4 through 6, and graduated my high school as valedictorian at the age of 14. I then worked as an intern at both Telsa, and NASA." Suddenly the room burst into laughter and many of board instantly started scribbling down "No" near the application check marks. The Dean says "Sorry but you are just not the type we are looking for." But then I said "Excuse me but I wasn't finished... I watch Rick and Morty" The Dean looked at me like an idiot and said "So....?" Then I replied with a smile "And I understand all the references and subtle jokes" An audible gasp let out by the board was so loud the secretary had to come in. You could hear a pin drop and then suddenly all at once the entire board clicked their pens on the "Approved Box" and I was instantly handed a diploma and now I'm teaching advanced physicals there. I guess you can say I'm pretty smart. :)
December 2020

Rick and Morty

Yes Chad (Nordic Gamer)

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⡛⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠒⠀⠀⠀⠈⠑⠂⠈⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠷⠤⣄⠈⠛⠦⣀⠀⠑⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠒⠤⣘⣯⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠓⠢⢤⣀⠀⠀⠙⢦⡀⠈⠓⢤⡀⠀⠀⠉⠐⠠⢀⠀⠀⠈⠐⠄⡀⠈⠢⡀⠀⠀⠹⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡷⡶⠤⣄⡈⠳⣤⡀⠀⠙⠲⣄⡀⠈⠓⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠑⠂⠀⠀⠀⢀⡐⠀⣈⣁⣠⡀⡻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠉⠻⣷⣤⡙⢦⣤⣍⣓⣦⣰⣶⡽⣷⣶⡟⠛⠿⠿⠶⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⠋⠈⠉⠙⠉⠉⠛⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⢦⣙⡄⠀⠉⠉⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⢀⡀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠈⠏⠀⠀⠀⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⠀⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⣦⣀⣤⣶⣒⣶⣤⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⢀⣠⡶⠛⠉⠻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠙⠚⠛⣦⠤⡤⠬⡙⠓⠦⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⢿⡉⠀⠒⠢⡄⢹⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠇⠀⠆⠀⣻⣛⣂⣤⠜⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣏⠳⣽⣤⡴⠦⡌⡄⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠏⠀⡌⠀⠀⠈⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡏⠳⡄⢸⡇⠀⢀⠇⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡟⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣴⡋⠹⣗⡙⠻⡇⠀⠈⣰⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠤⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡜⢿⠀⠹⢦⡀⢨⡁⣇⢀⣼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣦⣤⣤⣶⣤⣤⡨⠀⢰⠖⠒⢤⡀⡼⡇⠈⠳⡀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⡏⠘⠦⠤⠤⠤⠴⠶⠦⠴⠖⠒⠋⢙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⢠⡀⢨⡙⠦⢤⣸⠟⡆⢠⢻⠃⢷⠀⠀⠘⠦⠀⠀⠁⠈⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣷⣦⣵⣄⠉⡀⠀⠈⢿⠁⢴⡾⠀⠈⢧⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠚⣿⠿⠶⠶⠶⣦⠃⡴⠶⠶⠶⠶⣶⠾⠷⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⠶⣦⠀⣠⡴⠶⠛⠛⠛⠻⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠉⠁⠀⣿⠉⠄⢻⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣼⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⢯⠇⠀⠀⠀⣼⠀⠈⢸⣧⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡾⢀⠀⠀⢠⠏⠀⠀⢀⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠟⠀⠀⠀⢰⣏⣽⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣿⣀⣀⣀⣀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣄⣸⣤⣴⠋⠄⠀⡄⠈⡻⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠁⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠛⣷⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡇⠙⠋⠈⣷⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠁⢹⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠇⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣷⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡀⡀⠄⠀⠀⠆⠀⠀⡀⢀⣬⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡟⠀⠀⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣄⣠⣄⣀⣀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⣀⣠⣼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠛⢻⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡟⠛⠛⠛⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣼⣿⣿⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣷⣤⣤⣤⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
June 2021

I sexually identify as Rick Harrison

twitchquotes: I sexually identify as Rick Harrison. For 21 years I dreamed of working at my very own pawn shop with my old man and my son, Big Hoss. Call me retarded but I don’t care, I’m getting plasticsurgery to install 18th century muskets and vintage movieposters on my body. You can now refer to me as Rick Harrison and respect my right to not know WHAT is gonna come through that door. If you can't acceptme you're a pawnphobe and need to check your door privileges. Thank you for having a story and a price.
twitch chat
August 2016

Rick Harrison

I sexually Identify as

Text-to-Speech Playing