[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
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God I wish Winston was real

twitchquotes: God I wish Winston was real. I want him to sit on my face with his furry ass. I want him to yell "THE POWER OF SCIENCE" as he thrusts into me. I want him to spam "OH YEAH" when we're finished. God if Blizzard made life-sized cutouts of Winston I would buy them all for myself and keep them in my basement for my pleasure. God I wish Winston was real.
twitch chat
March 2018

Overwatch

Stabbed with Kniferino made out of an OJ Carton

twitchquotes: Oแด„แด›แด€แด ษชแด€ษด Mแดส€แดsแด€ษด, แดแด›สœแด‡ส€แดกษชsแด‡ แด‹ษดแดแดกษด แด€s Kส€ษชแด˜แด˜, สœแด€s แด˜แด€ssแด‡แด… แด€แดกแด€ส แด›สœษชs แด›แดœแด‡sแด…แด€ส's แด€า“แด›แด‡ส€ษดแดแดษด. Hแด‡ แดกแด€s แด€แดส™แดœsสœแด‡แด… ส™ส แด€ ษขส€แดแดœแด˜ แดา“ แด…แดษดษขแด‡ส€s ษชษด แด€ษด แด€สŸสŸแด‡ส, แด€ษดแด… sแด›แด€ส™ส™แด‡แด… แดกษชแด›สœ แด€ แด‹ษดษชา“แด‡ส€ษชษดแด แดแด€แด…แด‡ แดแดœแด› แดา“ แด€ษด OJ แด„แด€ส€แด›แดษด. RIP ษชษด แด˜แด‡แด˜แด˜แด‡ส€แดษดษช แด„แด€แด˜แด˜แดœแด„แด„ษชษดแด แด˜ษชsแด›แด€แด„สœษชแด, สแดแดœ sสœแด€สŸสŸ ส™แด‡ แดษชssแด‡แด….
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kawaii Gun

โ€ฆ_โ€ฆ..____________________, , โ€ฆโ€ฆ/ KAWAII GUN `โ€”-___________โ€”โ€”_____] = = = = =(๏พ‰โ—•ใƒฎโ—•)๏พ‰*:๏ฝฅ๏พŸโœง โ€ฆ../_==o;;;;;;;;_______.:/ โ€ฆ..), โ€”-.(_(__) / โ€ฆ.// (..) ), โ€”โ€”โ€ โ€ฆ//___// ..//___// .//___//
October 2021

Weebs

Anime

Squidward

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–€ โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€ โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€ โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€
August 2018

It starts with a surge of adrenaline

twitchquotes: It starts with a surge of adrenaline. Signals flood the nervous system. Pupils race back and forth behind closed eyelids. Then open. Now itโ€™s up to you to decide what to do with it.
twitch chat
March 2019
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