[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
I used to be a real ad
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3-eyed face

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€(โ—)โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–“ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–’โ–’โ–“(โ—)โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–’โ–“โ–“(โ—)โ–ˆโ–“ โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€
ascii art
November 2014

Canadaland

twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

I hate when people refer to orange juice as OJ

I hate when people refer to orange juice as OJ. Why OJ? Do you want to sound cool? Is it so much of a hustle to say orange juice? Do you abbreviate apple juice too? " Hey yeah, let me have some AJ?" - said by no one ever. I just think it sound annoying af. Edit: I don't have any issues with abbreviations, except for OJ as orange juice. Sorry if I offended some of you with sensitive feelings.
May 2022

WOW kid you just got r/WOOOOOOSHED

WOW kid you just got r/WOOOOOOSHED!!!! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ‘€ "Wooosh" means you didn't get the joke, as in the sound made when the joke "woooshes" over your head. I bet you're too stupid to get it, IDIOT!! ๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜ค๐Ÿ˜‚ His joke was so thoughtfully crafted and took him a total of like 3 minutes, you SHOULD be laughing. ๐Ÿคฌ What's that? His joke is bad? I think that's just because you failed. He outsmarted you, nitwit.๐Ÿคญ In conclusion, I am posting this to the community known as "R/Wooooosh" to claim my internet points in your embarrassment ๐Ÿ˜. Imbecile. The Germans refer to this action as "Schadenfreude," which means "harm-joy" ๐Ÿ˜ฌ๐Ÿ˜ฒ. WOW! ๐Ÿคช Another reference I had to explain to you. ๐Ÿคฆโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿคญ I am going to cease this conversation for I do not converse with simple minded persons.๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜‚
October 2021

Reynad is the math teacher and I am a sexy lifeguard boy

twitch chat
March 2014
Reynad
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