[Copypasta] mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition

I'm convinced that mattress/furniture stores exist in a quantum superposition of grand opening and going out of business sale. It is both and neither at once until an observer records the state at which point it becomes one or the other. But because you know exactly where the store is located, you cannot know how fast it is going out of business because of your uncertainty about its business momentum. All around us, all the time pairs of anti-discount mattress stores and discount mattress stores are popping into existence, forming the quantum memory foam that is the basis for the universe. Without the pressure of this quantum memory foam strip malls would collapse. We can see evidence of this when a pair is created such that one half is within the sales radius of a supermassive furniture store like Ikea-- one of them is pulled in and the other escapes as a Hawking mattress store.
December 2020
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers

"touch grass" is not an insult towards gamers, rather it is advice for them. When participating in intense periods of gaming, the human hand has a tendency to get sweaty. The sweat causes the hand to become slick, and it b becomes more difficult to retain a grip on the gamers gaming mouse, thus making it more difficult to perform well in intense gaming moments. By touching grass with the gamers hand, the grass will impart a layer of particulate onto the gamers hand, the particulate can be made of a variety of dusts, dirts and other natural matter. This particulate will then act in a similar form to climbers chalk, absorbing the sweat and drying out the gamers hand. With dry hands, the gamer can now perform to their maximum when gaming. This is why when an enemy or teammate tells you to touch grass, they are simply trying to assist you in performing better.
July 2021

Classic

Gray Screen Simulator for Windows

twitchquotes: Hey Tyler, I was just curious if this was the new Gray Screen Simulator for Windows and Windows devices? I've been seeing a lot of good reviews and was curious about picking it up. Thanks for the advice, buddy!
twitch chat
November 2018
Tyler1

League of Legends

πŸ‘»BOO! Srry did I scare you?

twitchquotes: πŸ‘»πŸ‘»πŸ‘»BOO! Srry did I scare you???πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ it's October πŸŽƒπŸ‘»πŸ’€πŸ‘½πŸ˜ˆπŸŒ‘ you know what that means 😏😏 SLUT-O-WEEN πŸ‘― send this to 10 of your 10 sluttiest ghost bitches 😝😝 if you get 5 back you're a slutty witch but if you get 10 ur the spookiest bitch on the blockπŸŽƒπŸ‘―πŸ”₯πŸ’€πŸ‘»
twitch chat
September 2017

Emoji Pasta

THIS USED TO BE A 2016 STREAM

twitchquotes: FeelsBadMan THIS USED TO BE A 2016 STREAM FeelsBadMan THIS USED TO BE A 2016 STREAM FeelsBadMan
twitch chat
January 2017

My BODY is machine that turns diary products into spicy liquid diarrhea

My πŸ€Έβ€β™‚οΈBODYπŸ‹οΈβ€β™€οΈ is a πŸš‚πŒπ€π‚π‡πˆππ„πŸš‚ that turns πŸ„π’Ήπ’Άπ’Ύπ“‡π“Ž π“…π“‡π‘œπ’Ήπ“Šπ’Έπ“‰π“ˆπŸ₯› into ➑ πŸ”₯β“ˆβ“…β’Ύβ’Έβ“ŽπŸ”₯ πŸ³π“π’Ύπ“†π“Šπ’Ύπ’ΉπŸ’¦ πŸ’©πŸ’©π”»π•€π”Έβ„β„β„π”Όπ”ΈπŸ’ͺπŸ’ͺ
March 2021

Emoji Pasta

Text-to-Speech Playing