[Copypasta] Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon

twitchquotes: Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazonβ„’. As many of you know, we have recently bought over "Twitch tv". Users must now buy 'Emotes' such as " Kappa ", " Kreygasm " and " FrankerZ ". If users proceed to use these emotes without buying and owning them, we will have to, not only remove the account of the user but also, shut down the stream we have evidence that is has been used in. Thank you, do not copy and paste this. This is business, kid.
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie
What happened to this ad? :(
More imaqtpie Copypastas

Imqtpie losing his farmer's license for poor cs

twitchquotes: Hey, qtPie this is the NSA (National Service of Agriculture). If you do not start getting some cs soon, we will have to revoke your farmer license
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

Monitor always grey, need you to fix

twitchquotes: β˜ŽοΈπŸ“ž BabyRage HELLO? Computer repairman?? β˜ŽοΈπŸ“ž BabyRage This is QT β˜ŽοΈπŸ“ž BabyRage Monitor always grey β˜ŽοΈπŸ“ž BabyRage need you to fix
twitch chat
May 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

League of Lesbians

twitchquotes: Once upon a time, I opened a LoL game. I entered the game, and I was promptly greeted by another player. I noticed it was a female player and I was pleasantly surprised. I told her of my great love for the female anatomy, particularly the breasts and the backside. To my surprise, she told me she also enjoyed these things. It was then that I realised, I was playing League of Lesbians.....
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Hello Michael Santana, this is your local tax officer

twitchquotes: Hello Michael Santana, this is your local tax officer. Your last reply as to why you haven't paid your taxes is unnacceptable. "I'll check it out later" and "You know how I get down" are NOT valid excuses. We are sending our men over RIGHT NOW to start repossessing your house.
twitch chat
November 2016
imaqtpie

My sister bet 100 dollars that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti

twitchquotes: My sister bet 100 dollars that I couldn't build a car out of spaghetti. You should've seen the look on her face as I drove pasta!
twitch chat
January 2015
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing