[Copypasta] Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon

twitchquotes: Hello this is Jeff Bezos, CEO of Amazon™. As many of you know, we have recently bought over "Twitch tv". Users must now buy 'Emotes' such as " Kappa ", " Kreygasm " and " FrankerZ ". If users proceed to use these emotes without buying and owning them, we will have to, not only remove the account of the user but also, shut down the stream we have evidence that is has been used in. Thank you, do not copy and paste this. This is business, kid.
twitch chat
August 2014
imaqtpie
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More imaqtpie Copypastas

Ingrid Newkirk, leader of the largest animal rights group

twitchquotes: Ingrid Newkirk here,leader of the largest animal rights group,PETA.How DARE you soil that innocent dog's ears with the word "weiner" and "Dolly"?That's like excessively cursing at a newborn.The cops should be there soon.Bye.
twitch chat
November 2014
imaqtpie

Urgot demands playtime!

twitchquotes: Dear Mr Rodriguez Qtpie. This is Urgot, the best ranged champion since Thresh ADC. I must confess that I find your consistant playing of other ADCs whilst neglecting me racist. Urgot demands playtime!! Kappa
twitch chat
December 2014
imaqtpie

Dongerino Macaroni, President of Copy Pasta Industries

twitchquotes: Hello, it is me Dongerino Macaroni, President of Copy Pasta Industries. We have received many complaints from your stream about the lak of copy pasta products your chat is using. As your sponsor, we suggest you supply your chat with more Kappa 's or ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽'s to keep your chat up to company standards. Thank you for your time.
twitch chat
May 2015
imaqtpie

Deserverinos my Bestest Doritorinos

twitchquotes: ʜᴇʟʟᴏ ᴛʜɪs ɪs ʀᴏʟʟᴀɴᴅ sᴍɪᴛʜ ᴄʀᴇᴀᴛᴏʀ ᴏғ ᴅᴏʀɪᴛᴏs sᴘᴇᴀᴋɪɴɢ ғʀᴏᴍ ɢʀᴀᴠᴇ. ɪ ᴄᴏᴍᴇ ᴛᴏ sᴀʏ ᴛʜɪs ᴍᴀɴ ᴅᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇʀɪɴᴏs ᴍʏ ʙᴇsᴛᴇsᴛ ᴅᴏʀɪᴛᴏʀɪɴᴏs, ɪ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ᴛʜᴀᴛs ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴡɪᴛᴄʜ ᴄʜᴀᴛ ᴜɴᴅᴇʀsᴛᴀɴᴅᴇʀɪɴᴏs ᴍʏ ᴍᴇssᴀɢᴇʀɪɴᴏ. ᴏʜ ᴀɴᴅ ᴏʙʟɪɢᴀᴛᴏʀʏ ᴘʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴘᴀsᴛᴀʀɪɴᴏ.
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

Helping us polish the in-game spectator feature

twitchquotes: Hi Imaqtpie, this is Riot Games CEO Nicolo Laurent speaking. We want to thank you on behalf of the Valorant rage team for helping us polish the in-game spectator feature.
twitch chat
April 2020
imaqtpie

Valorant

Text-to-Speech Playing