[Copypasta] It's 2036

It’s 2036. Your mom was an e girl with an onlyfans and your dad is a sadboi guitarist. 98% of the Caucasian male students in school are named Aiden. Every afternoon you come home to check on Mom because she still thinks posting memes about wanting to die are in. She sees you pull out your homework and you sigh. “No, mom. I don’t want to listen to Lo-Fi beats to study and relax to.” She looks mildly disappointed but perks up again. “No horror trap/witch house either,” you interrupt. SadDad walks in and pats you on the back, but not before saying “Aye, fam. You look a little upset, u wanna go get a face tat?”
October 2020
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More Copypastas

Kripp sends Hafu a romantic letter

twitchquotes: Kripp, this is Hafu... Remember when i asked you to unleash your hounds on my freezing trap but instead you gave me an explosive shot to the face with your acidic swamp ooze? While i always love a good multishot to the face... you finished so quickly it fealt like i was having sex with Nozdormu or something... i mean, i am not just some succubus for you to shiv any time you please..
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking (Nolan Grayson)

I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking. I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Nolan Grayson. That perfect, shredded body. The perfectly trimmed mustache. The planet conquering skills of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with him, have him pass his genes through me, and have me birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance for Nolan Grayson to get me pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Robert Kirkman create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
June 2021

Kripp's old channel description

twitchquotes: Did you know Kripp and Krippi are the first to kill Diablo with Hardcore characters on Inferno? Kripparrian’s channel features end game coverage of Hearthstone, Diablo, Warcraft, Guild Wars 2, and other games. All played at the most hardcore and competitive levels possible, live every day!
twitch chat
May 2017
Kripp

I HECKING LOVE BUYING ELECTRICTY

twitchquotes: BatChest I HECKING LOVE BUYING ELECTRICTY BatChest I FEEL SO PROUD OWNING THESE ELECTRONS BatChest
twitch chat
September 2021

Cryptocurrency

NFTs

Man-made sack containing balls

twitchquotes: Long ago in the land of Minecraft I noticed that the ink sacs were spelled sac, instead of sack, I got confused and googled it, I discovered that a sac is just an organic sack, part of an animal or whatnot, and now multiple years later, I’m coming to the realisation ball sacks shouldn’t be called ball sacks, they should be called ball sacs, a ball sack would be a man-made sack containing balls
twitch chat
March 2020
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