[Copypasta] It's 2036

It’s 2036. Your mom was an e girl with an onlyfans and your dad is a sadboi guitarist. 98% of the Caucasian male students in school are named Aiden. Every afternoon you come home to check on Mom because she still thinks posting memes about wanting to die are in. She sees you pull out your homework and you sigh. “No, mom. I don’t want to listen to Lo-Fi beats to study and relax to.” She looks mildly disappointed but perks up again. “No horror trap/witch house either,” you interrupt. SadDad walks in and pats you on the back, but not before saying “Aye, fam. You look a little upset, u wanna go get a face tat?”
October 2020
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

I've been depressed and suicidal because of my mom's onlyfans

I'm 13 and and my mom is 33. Things at the school were never great. I'm sorta short so i get picked on some but it was manageable. That was, until one of my classmates showed me a picture of my mom naked. I almost had a panic attack and had to be excused from the classroom. I ended up not showing up to school for a few days (faking sick). I was hoping that things would cool off but they didn't. As soon as I got to school almost everyone was staring and laughing at me. This has been going on for about a week now. I was wondering how my classmates even got the pictures and apparently my mom advertises her onlyfans on her personal Twitter account. Some students from the school follow her and were able to see the nudes and they have been spread everywhere. I don't even have a Twitter so I didn't know about any of this. The worst part is when I confronted my mom about this she told me that I was overreacting and that sex work is basically the same as working at a bank or a grocery store. She also said it makes her feel good about herself and that I should be happy that she's more confident now. I told the principal but they can't suspend thousands of students or take anyone's phones. I've been crying in my room everyday for the past week. I don't think I can take it anymore.
July 2021

She needs a man that can treat her right

twitchquotes: What the fuck man. I'm literally sitting here on the verge of tears. Slaving away in this dead end job saving up for the end of the month splash. I was this close. Maybe I should have done that overtime, if I could get her that money earlier I might have been able to convince her in the dono message. She needs a man that can treat her right, a man like me. I would open the car door for her EVERY TIME, I would pull out her chair at a restaurant, I would lay my twitch hoodie over puddles to protect her from the filth.
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December 2020

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Alexa play Ram Ranch

twitchquotes: ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ: Ram Ranch ─────────⚪───── ◄◄⠀▶⠀►►⠀ 4:33 / 6:50 ⠀ ───○ 🔊 ᴴᴰ ⚙️
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KappaPride

if you go to walmart at 3 AM naked, and scream "AMONG US SUS"

if you go to walmart at 3 AM naked, and scream "AMONG US SUS" 69 times, these mysterious figures known as "The Police" will knock you out, and you'll end up in a cell with a man nicknamed "BIG JOHN". pretty scary, right?
June 2021

Among Us / Amogus

A physicist called Octavian

twitchquotes: The year is 2027. A physicist called Octavian has created the first inter-dimensional portal capable of exploring alternate galaxies. "Finally, I have done it..." he says as he steps into the portal. He enters a room where he sees himself giving a "Brofist" to his computer. His only reaction: " FailFish ".
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April 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing