[Copypasta] It's 2036

It’s 2036. Your mom was an e girl with an onlyfans and your dad is a sadboi guitarist. 98% of the Caucasian male students in school are named Aiden. Every afternoon you come home to check on Mom because she still thinks posting memes about wanting to die are in. She sees you pull out your homework and you sigh. “No, mom. I don’t want to listen to Lo-Fi beats to study and relax to.” She looks mildly disappointed but perks up again. “No horror trap/witch house either,” you interrupt. SadDad walks in and pats you on the back, but not before saying “Aye, fam. You look a little upset, u wanna go get a face tat?”
October 2020
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Brazilian No. 1 Futbol Player Eduardo Pasterinho

twitchquotes: Wᴇʟʟ ᴍᴇᴛ Kʀɪᴘᴘᴀʀɪᴀɴ! Iᴛ ɪs I, Bʀᴀᴢɪʟɪᴀɴ Nᴏ. 1 ғᴜᴛʙᴏʟ ᴘʟᴀʏᴇʀ Eᴅᴜᴀʀᴅᴏ Pᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴʜᴏ. Aғᴛᴇʀ ᴍʏ ᴛᴇᴀᴍ ɢᴏᴛ ᴡʀᴇᴄᴋᴇᴅ ʙʏ ᴛʜᴇ Gᴇʀᴍᴀɴ ᴛʀʏʜᴀʀᴅs, I ғᴇᴀʀ ғᴏʀ ᴍʏ ᴊᴏʙ. Pʟs ʜᴇʟᴘ ʙʏ ᴅᴏɴᴀᴛɪɴɢ sᴀʟᴛ ᴏʀ ᴛᴏᴘᴅᴇᴄᴋɪɴɢ ᴍʏ sᴀʟᴀʀʏ. Pʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘᴀ ᴘᴀsᴛᴇʀɪɴʜᴏ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Ben Shapiro

⣿⣿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣤⣤⣀⣀⣠⣤⣤⣷⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣄⠀⠀⢸⣿ ⣷⠀⠀⠈⠨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⢸⣿ ⣿⡄⠀⠀⣈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠀⠀⢸⣿ ⣿⡇⠀⠀⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⠀⢸⣿ ⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠿⡿⢀⡀⠀⣔⣿ ⣇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠉⠛⣿⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠋⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⡇⢠⣾⣿ ⣇⠇⠀⣠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⡀⢸⣿⣿⣇⣀⣀⢠⣀⢀⠀⠀⣀⣠⣶⡇⣾⣿⣿ ⣿⡄⠀⢸⣿⣶⣤⣀⣀⣠⣽⣿⠁⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣼⣬⣭⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡇⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣷⡄⠀⠈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⢬⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠀⢠⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣇⠀⠀⠘⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠀⠈⠛⠿⠟⠙⠛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⠀⠀⣼⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠙⢿⣿⣿⣖⣄⣀⠀⢰⣿⣿⢿⣿⢿⣿⣿⡿⠀⠀⠸⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⡀⠈⢈⠙⠛⢟⣋⢁⢁⣠⣤⣼⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⠟⢀⢀⠚⠚⠛⠙⠛⢛⣿⣿⡟⠛⠁⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠨⢿⣷⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠇⠂⠀⠀⢠⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢐⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠯⠿⡹⠛⠟⠉⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⢿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
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Kripp and his Flamboyant lifestyle

twitchquotes: Octavian, you are an inspiration. You are not afraid to be flamboyant and admit that you live an alternative lifestyle. I think you are one of the best gay streamers on twitch and you are a great role model. I know some people probably don't understand, but i do.
twitch chat
April 2014
Kripp

KappaPride

Great job Mods. I am rooting for you always!

twitchquotes: Hey Mods, I hope you can see this message now that the chat has died down. I wanted to say congrats! I know it's hard to manage a TwitchTV chat but I always want to tip my hat off to you guys. Through thick and thin I will still be here to always support you. I know times are hard, but you always come back with a good attitude. I wish you the very best on your next timeouts, and hope you get an even better ban score. I will continue to be here and find new TOS violations as always. Great job Mods. I am rooting for you always! You should be proud.
twitch chat
November 2014

MODS

Marginally optimizing a children's game!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, loyal fan chiming in here (for once). I think your stream is great! I would have spent my time working towards a cure for cancer, or how to automate food production in the 3rd world, but luckily i stumbled onto your stream and now I can waste my time watching you marginally optimize a children's game! What a career you have made!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing