[Copypasta] It's 2036

It’s 2036. Your mom was an e girl with an onlyfans and your dad is a sadboi guitarist. 98% of the Caucasian male students in school are named Aiden. Every afternoon you come home to check on Mom because she still thinks posting memes about wanting to die are in. She sees you pull out your homework and you sigh. “No, mom. I don’t want to listen to Lo-Fi beats to study and relax to.” She looks mildly disappointed but perks up again. “No horror trap/witch house either,” you interrupt. SadDad walks in and pats you on the back, but not before saying “Aye, fam. You look a little upset, u wanna go get a face tat?”
October 2020
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More Copypastas

Chess is dead

Chess hasn't been updated in almost 200 years and it's obvious the devs have abandoned it. The greedy creators took your money and laughed all the way to the bank. I remember back in 705 AD when chess was fun. Then they started adding stupid features no one wanted like "Castling" and "En Passant" instead of listening to player feedback and fixing game-breaking bugs. I've been complaining for YEARS about the collision-detection glitch with the horsey. The "clipping-thru-pieces" bug has been abused to death and the lazy devs refuse to fix it. Don't support this awful behaviour and boycott this company.
February 2020

Chess

Leave the competition to the the competitors

twitchquotes: WHY in the FUCK do you PLEBS roll in here and think you can backseat game the GREAT [insert streamer name]. He is a god who floats in your sea of wrong on his ship of right. His plays are FLAWLESS and every loss he takes is pure, unadultared, rng, bullshit. Get your tiny minds out of here and go watch something more casual!! Leave the competition to the the competitors. [insert streamer name] god has essential work to do.
twitch chat
April 2020

That's some good shit right there

twitchquotes: 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀 good shit go౦ԁ sHit👌 thats ✔ some good👌👌shit right👌👌th 👌 ere👌👌👌 right✔there ✔✔if i do ƽaү so my self 💯 i say so 💯 thats what im talking about right there right there (chorus: ʳᶦᵍʰᵗ ᵗʰᵉʳᵉ) mMMMMᎷМ💯 👌👌 👌НO0ОଠOOOOOОଠଠOoooᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒᵒ👌 👌👌 👌 💯 👌 👀 👀 👀 👌👌Good shit
twitch chat
September 2015

Emoji Pasta

Classic

This message adds zero value to your life

twitchquotes: This message adds zero value to your life. I hope you enjoyed reading this, because I enjoyed typing it out. If you are still reading this, I would just like to tell you that you are wasting your time. If you think anything positive will come out of this final sentence, you are mistaken
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Menacing

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⠿⣫⣥⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠄⠄⠾⢿⢟⣵⣾⣿⡿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣰⡿⣀⣤⣴⣾⣿⡇⠙⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣴⣿⣿⠿⠛⠉⢩⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣼⡿⣫⣾⠆⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⠇⠄⠄⠄⣠⣎⣠⣴⣶⠎⠛⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠛⠋⠄⠄⢀⣼⣿⠿⠛⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠛⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠉⠄⠄⢸⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣼⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠋⠉⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
January 2021

JoJo's Bizarre Adventure

Text-to-Speech Playing