[Copypasta] My son is learning Twitch speak

twitchquotes: Kripp I need advice. My son watches a lot of you, and he doesn’t speak English but is learning from chat. He's starting using terms like "pog","jabaited", and "kappa,” but its gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. At dinner my daughter was talking about how she got accepted to college, and my son said "pog you, easy clap". I told him to talk normally to his family, and he replied "Weird champ, normies omegaLOL." I blacklisted twitch and now my son is hysterical, what to do.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp
What happened to this ad? :(
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NaCl deficiency disorder

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, your stream has changed my life completely. I suffer from severe NaCl (salt) deficiency disorder. I had to visit the hospital 5 times a week for salt injections. However, watching your stream supplies me enough salt through the screen. You saved me money time and effort. I can't thank you enough. I owe u my life.
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salty

Kripp thinks that milk is bad for you

twitchquotes: My dad drank milk his whole life. One day my mom told him "If u want to see ur children graduate, u have to stop" 3 years later he died of calcium deficiency. My mom told me "Dont drink milk; dont put your family through this" At 24, I have never touched a glass of milk. I must say, I feel a sense of regret, because watching Kripp play Hearthstone gave me calcium deficiency anyway.
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Spooky story

twitchquotes: One day there was Man. He wake up in night time like 3 or 4 am in the morning, Much sweat from nightmare of skeletons!! He turns on his computer and waited for the screen to load. "I will watch Kripparrian to calm my fears" he Mumbled. As he click the URL the stream loads... but there is only skeletons... Plz no creepy pasta this spooky story
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Mods are asleep! Post your dank memes!

twitchquotes: PogChamp MODS ARE ASLEEP!! POST YOUR DANK MEMES PogChamp
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A long long time ago, when Kripp was noLife

twitchquotes: A long long time ago, when Kripp was noLife, he stumbled across an old woman in an alleyway after buying some lentil soup. She told Kripp to give him the soup and in return he would find a beautiful girl. Unfortunately, Kripp didnt realize the old woman was the succubus Raina, who would eventually make him a simple casualarrians
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