[Copypasta] My son is learning Twitch speak

twitchquotes: Kripp I need advice. My son watches a lot of you, and he doesn’t speak English but is learning from chat. He's starting using terms like "pog","jabaited", and "kappa,” but its gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. At dinner my daughter was talking about how she got accepted to college, and my son said "pog you, easy clap". I told him to talk normally to his family, and he replied "Weird champ, normies omegaLOL." I blacklisted twitch and now my son is hysterical, what to do.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Marginally optimizing a children's game!

twitchquotes: Hey Kripp, loyal fan chiming in here (for once). I think your stream is great! I would have spent my time working towards a cure for cancer, or how to automate food production in the 3rd world, but luckily i stumbled onto your stream and now I can waste my time watching you marginally optimize a children's game! What a career you have made!
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

Trump wakes up chained to the wall

twitchquotes: Trump wakes up chained to the wall of a small room with Kripp standing over him. Orange Juice begins pouring from the walls, quickly filling the space. Trump screams in horror as he struggles to get free. Kripp walks out, shuts the door and sits down to begin his stream, the white wall of the death chamber visible behind him for all his viewers to see
twitch chat
July 2015
Kripp

When Kripp is eat I pretend he is eat me

twitchquotes: Wʜᴇɴ Kʀɪᴘᴘ ɪs ᴇᴀᴛ ɪ ᴘʀᴇᴛᴇɴᴅ ʜᴇ ɪs ᴇᴀᴛ ᴍᴇ. ɪ ɢᴏ ᴅᴏᴡɴ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ᴡᴇᴛ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ᴛʜʀᴏᴀᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ᴀᴍ ɪɴ ᴡᴀʀᴍ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ sᴛᴏᴍᴀᴄʜ. ᴛʜᴇɴ ɪ ɢᴏ ᴅᴇᴇᴘᴇʀ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴛʜᴇ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ. ɪ ᴀᴍ ᴍᴀᴅᴇ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ɢᴏʟᴅ. ᴛʜᴇ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ sɪᴛs ᴏɴ ᴛᴏɪʟᴇᴛ ᴀɴᴅ ғʀᴇᴇs ᴍᴇ. ɪ ᴀᴍ sᴀᴅ ɪ ᴀᴍ ɴᴏ ʟᴏɴɢᴇʀ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ғᴏᴏᴅ. ᴛʜᴇɴ ᴋʀɪᴘᴘ ᴇᴀᴛs ᴍᴇ ᴀɢᴀɪɴ.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

YA SPAM IT

twitchquotes: ヽ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽ノ THIS IS OUR CHAT MODS ヽ༼◥▶ل͜◀◤༽ノ (̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)̄ YA SPAM IT (̿▀̿ ̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿)̄
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Canadian man brofisting the local Greek population

twitchquotes: Last night in Greece, Greek police heard reports of a Canadian man in a blue tacky sweater walking around the streets at night, 'brofisting' the local population. As a result 20,000 greek citizens have contracted the casualitis. If you see this man, please report to greek policerino department.
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing