[Copypasta] My son is learning Twitch speak

twitchquotes: Kripp I need advice. My son watches a lot of you, and he doesn’t speak English but is learning from chat. He's starting using terms like "pog","jabaited", and "kappa,” but its gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. At dinner my daughter was talking about how she got accepted to college, and my son said "pog you, easy clap". I told him to talk normally to his family, and he replied "Weird champ, normies omegaLOL." I blacklisted twitch and now my son is hysterical, what to do.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Kripp Copypastas

Shill this half baked product to your loyal fanbase

twitchquotes: Kripp's covetous eyes glisten as the Marvel: Future Fight devs hand over a stack of cash. "Make sure you shill this half baked product to your loyal fanbase" they instruct. Kripp licks his salty lips and mutters an agreeable "k"
twitch chat
July 2017
Kripp

sellout

Breakdown of Kripp stream

twitchquotes: Breakdown of Kripp stream: ☑ always 1 hr late ☑ 20 minute intro ☑ bit sleepy today ☑ foodie time ☑ constant salt/complaining ☑ 1 hr of actual gameplay ☑ ending stream early ☑ no stream tomorrow
twitch chat
May 2015
Kripp

United States of America is now known as West Iran

twitchquotes: The year is 2024. The United States of America is now known as West Iran after the assassination of Supreme Leader Donald Trump from drone warfare. I hide in my nuclear bunker, praying to God that I survive another night. I open my laptop and see Kripp streaming some HS battlegrounds, still forcing murlocs and hardstuck at 7k MMR. "Still never lucky, huh old friend..." I whisper to myself as the bombs fall outside...
twitch chat
February 2020
Kripp

Hearthstone

Potato harvest is bad. Play Hearthstone in Amerikanski

twitchquotes: My name Dimitri Baryshnikov. I grow up in small farm to have make potatos. Father say "Dimitri, potato harvest is bad. Need you to have play porfessional game in Amerikanski for make money for head-scarf for babushka." I bring honor to komrade and babushka. Sorry for is not have English. Plz no cykapasta
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

The Headbutts will be random

twitchquotes: "Tʜᴇ ʜᴇᴀᴅʙᴜᴛᴛs ᴡɪʟʟ ʙᴇ ʀᴀɴᴅᴏᴍ" Kʀɪᴘᴘ ᴅᴇᴄʀᴇᴇs. Aɴᴅ sᴏ ᴀ ɴᴇᴡ ғᴀᴄᴛɪᴏɴ ᴏғ sᴜʙs ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʙᴏʀɴ. Tʜᴇʀᴇ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʙʀᴏғɪsᴛᴇᴅ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴛʜᴏsᴇ ᴡʜᴏ ᴡᴇʀᴇ ʙʀᴏʙᴜᴛᴛᴇᴅ. Sᴏᴏɴ ᴀ ᴡᴀʀ ᴇʀᴜᴘᴛᴇᴅ ʙᴇᴛᴡᴇᴇɴ ᴛʜᴇ ᴛᴡᴏ, ᴀɴᴅ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs ᴀᴛᴛᴀᴄᴋᴇᴅ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs, ᴀʟʟ ʙᴇᴄᴏᴍɪɴɢ sᴀʟᴛʏ..
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing