[Copypasta] My son is learning Twitch speak

twitchquotes: Kripp I need advice. My son watches a lot of you, and he doesn’t speak English but is learning from chat. He's starting using terms like "pog","jabaited", and "kappa,” but its gotten to the point where every sentence is Twitchspeak. At dinner my daughter was talking about how she got accepted to college, and my son said "pog you, easy clap". I told him to talk normally to his family, and he replied "Weird champ, normies omegaLOL." I blacklisted twitch and now my son is hysterical, what to do.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Shalom my fellow Twitchlings

twitchquotes: Shalom my fellow Twitchlings. My name is Herschel Goldstein, I hail from the ancient land of Israel. In this world there are two superior races: the valiant Japanese and the God-fearing Jews. When I met the great Kripp at Blizzcon 2013, he gave me a piece of advice that I will never forget: "Pentru a da oul omului, îl hrănești pentru o zi. Om învățat de ouă, îl va hrăni pentru o viață întreagă." Translated into foreign devil talk: I am coming Yankee scum. Get on board or get out of the way."
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp

Spamming is my passion

twitchquotes: Dᴇᴀʀ ɴᴀᴢɪ ᴍᴏᴅs: Yᴏᴜ ᴍᴀʏ ʜᴀᴠᴇ ʙᴀɴɴᴇᴅ ᴍᴇ ғᴏʀ 10 ᴍɪɴᴜᴛᴇs, ʙᴜᴛ sʜɪᴛᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴡɪʟʟ ᴀʟᴡᴀʏs ғɪɴᴅ ᴀ ᴡᴀʏ. I ᴡɪʟʟ ʀᴀɪsᴇ ᴍʏ ᴅᴏɴɢᴇʀs. I ᴡɪʟʟ ʟɪᴇ ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ʜᴏᴡ ᴛᴏ ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ғᴀᴄᴇs. I ᴡɪʟʟ RIP ɪɴ ᴘᴇᴘᴘᴇʀᴏɴɴɪ ᴄᴀᴘᴘᴜᴄᴄɪɴᴏ ᴘɪsᴛᴀᴄʜɪᴏ. Sᴏ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴇᴠᴇɴ ᴡᴀsᴛᴇ ʏᴏᴜʀ ᴛɪᴍᴇ ʙᴀɴɴɪɴɢ ᴍᴇ, ʙᴇᴄᴀᴜsᴇ sᴘᴀᴍᴍɪɴɢ ɪs ᴍʏ ᴘᴀssɪᴏɴ, AND I WILL COME BACK! Pʟs ɴᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ɴᴀᴢɪʀɪɴᴏ ᴍᴏᴅᴇʀɪɴᴏ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

Kripp is a professional children's card game streamer

twitchquotes: Who the hell do you think you kids are? Kripp is a professional children's card game streamer and mobile games salesman, and you think you can just come in his chat and criticize him and his plays like you know something he doesn't? Get real. Maybe if you ate your veggies like my boy Kripp, you'd have the brainpower to make crazy split-second analytical decisions that can beat the other kids on the playground. Show some fucking respect
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Hearthstone

The prodigal son has returned

twitchquotes: Papparin opens the door to see a hobo squating outside his house. He hugs the lankey figure and tears drip onto a Diablo 2 shirt that has seen better times. "Tonight we feast," Papparin says as he begins to prepare a meal of falafel. Kripp flops down on his bed, surrounded by empty OJ cartons from a year ago. The prodigal son has returned.
twitch chat
June 2015
Kripp

Your sorry excuse for a job

twitchquotes: Kripp, how does it feel that by me disabling adblock I control whether or not your sorry excuse for a job continues existing
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing