[Copypasta] If your girlfriend cheats on you

twitchquotes: If your girlfriend cheats on you, you need to understand that you lacked something that made her cheat, so instead of leaving her for another girl, find out the error in yourself, apologise to her and be a Better man. ✌
twitch chat
June 2019
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Scraggly vegan is the only one left

twitchquotes: BOB β€œYou’re doing GREAT out there!” I exclaim with as much enthusiasm as I can this late in the day. The scraggly vegan is the only one left in the tavern, his attention focused entirely on the card game we put out to entertain children and toddlers. β€œI don’t wanna talk about it guys” cries the man, knocking his cup of vegan water over. I try to reassure him that everyone has bad luck now and then, but he just ignores me, as always. This tavern attracts some strange types indeed.
twitch chat
December 2019
Kripp

Hearthstone

A girl... AND a gamer?

A girl.... AND a gamer? Whoa mama! Hummina hummina hummina bazooooooooing! *eyes pop out* AROOOOOOOOGA! *jaw drops tongue rolls out* WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF *tongue bursts out of the outh uncontrollably leaking face and everything in reach* WURBLWUBRLBWURblrwurblwurlbrwubrlwburlwbruwrlblwublr *tiny cupid shoots an arrow through heart* Ahhhhhhhhhhh me lady... *heart in the shape of a heart starts beating so hard you can see it through shirt* ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum ba-bum *milk truck crashes into a bakery store in the background spiling white liquid and dough on the streets* BABY WANTS TO FUCK *inhales from the gas tank* honka honka honka honka *masturabtes furiously* ohhhh my gooooodd~
March 2021

Classic

sneaky and meteos are out walking in the park

twitchquotes: Its a cold autum eve and sneaky and meteos are out walking in the park as the multicolored leaves dwindles down on top of their heads, meteos slowly slips his hand into sneakys as he gives him a devious smile. they then proceed into the bushes and through the park the words ''METEOOOs'' could be heard eccoing.
twitch chat
July 2018
Sneaky

League of Legends

When well met, my eye automatically go to the paladin

twitchquotes: ο½—ο½ˆο½…ο½Žγ€€ο½—ο½…ο½Œο½Œγ€€ο½ο½…ο½”οΌŒγ€€ο½ο½™γ€€ο½…ο½™ο½…γ€€ο½ο½•ο½”ο½ο½ο½ο½”ο½‰ο½ƒο½ο½Œο½Œο½™γ€€ο½‡ο½γ€€ο½”ο½γ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½…γ€€ο½ο½ο½Œο½ο½„ο½‰ο½ŽοΌŽγ€€ο½‰γ€€ο½„ο½‰ο½–ο½‰ο½Žο½…γ€€ο½“ο½ˆο½‰ο½…ο½Œο½„γ€€ο½ο½™γ€€ο½„ο½‰ο½ƒο½‹γ€€ο½ο½Žο½„γ€€ο½†ο½…ο½…ο½Œγ€€ο½‰γ€€ο½ˆο½ο½–ο½…γ€€ο½“ο½…ο½˜γ€€ο½—ο½‰ο½”ο½ˆγ€€γ€€ο½”ο½ˆο½…γ€€ο½’ο½…ο½ƒο½’ο½•ο½‰ ο½”οΌŽγ€€ο½ο½Œο½Œγ€€ο½‚ο½…ο½ƒο½ο½ο½‰ο½Žο½‡γ€€ο½‡ο½…ο½”γ€€ο½„ο½ο½—ο½ŽοΌŽ
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

It is canon that Kermit the Frog caused 9/11 in the Muppet universe

In the 2002 TV film "It's a Very Merry Muppet Christmas Movie", there's a part where an angel shows Kermit an alrernate reality where he was never born. For whatever reason, the editors didn't really think about it, and continued to use footage with the twin towers still standing for this scene; however, they aren't there in his original universe. Therefore, something that Kermit did in his life, did in fact cause 9/11 in Muppet lore.
August 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing