[Copypasta] If your girlfriend cheats on you

twitchquotes: If your girlfriend cheats on you, you need to understand that you lacked something that made her cheat, so instead of leaving her for another girl, find out the error in yourself, apologise to her and be a Better man. โœŒ
twitch chat
June 2019
Found on Twitter: https://twitter.com/pattyamaka_/status/1032616980765978624
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Our most powerful technique - Submode

twitchquotes: "You are Anakin no longer, but Darth Vader. Rise my young apprentince," says Palpatine to the new Darth Vader. "My master, can you teach me how to resurrect the dead through the force?" asks Vader. Trump smirks, "In time, my apprentice, but first you must learn our most powerful technique - Sub Mode."
twitch chat
April 2015
Trump

Smash bros in the year 20XX

twitchquotes: The year is 20XX. Every official stream online has zero views because grassroots organizations have usurped all Esports streams. Nintendo is destitute and broke, their only source of income is through taxing sold copies of Melee, CRTs, and gamecubes. Society has evolved to the point that with a cybernetic implant, you can connect directly to netplay and shine on your opponent while broadcasting free of a DMCA complaint and a C&D letter from Nintendo. Doug Bowser is the last living human without an implant, and is found cold and naked, wondering why everyone is constantly talking about wavedashes.
twitch chat
December 2020

Super Smash Bros

Hearthstone cardback

โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–„โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–Œโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆ
ascii art
July 2015

Hearthstone

which position would you be in a human centipede?

When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however would answer third. Why you ask? When asked "which position would you be in a human centipede?" most would answer "first." I, however, would answer third. Why you ask? When the first member of the centipede is fed, they will eventually defecate forcing the second member to ingest their feces. One could imagine that would be considered incredibly disgusting. As such, the second member would immediately vomit. After vomit travels into the first member's anus and up into their colon, they'll then pust another load into the second member's mouth even more disgusting than the last. The third member would never ingest the feces of the second member as they will always vomit what the first member expels back into them. The third member of the centipede gets to chill while the first and second trade a volley of shitty barf with each other forever.
May 2022

Someone just posted that same paragraph...

twitchquotes: This is going to sound crazy, but someone posted that same paragraph just a minute ago. Here in this chat even. The odds of two people having the same paragraph-long thought is astronomical, especially in the same small website. Wow.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

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