[Copypasta] Shane Dawson tweet - i didnt fuck my cat

i didnt fuck my cat. i didnt cum on my cat. i didnt put my dick anywhere near my cat. Ive never done anything weird with my cats. I promised myself i wasnt going to make apology videos after last years thing so im just trying to be as short and honest with this as possible. (1/?)
March 2019

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YouTuber Shane Dawson randomly tweet this recently
What happened to this ad? :(
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Only way I can feel safe

twitchquotes: When I'm ready to go to sleep I grab my laptop and get in bed. I open my laptop, go to Kripps youtube, turn the brightness all the way up and watch the video with the laptop screen close to my eyes. When the video is done I close my eyes and can still see Kripps face while I go to sleep. It's the only way I can feel safe.
twitch chat
January 2015
Kripp

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I fucked Up DVD

Earlier today I was really horny, and I saw what I thought to be a blank DVD. I thought, DVDs have a tight hole, they might feel pretty good. So I put my soft pp into the hole of the DVD, and for a few seconds as I started getting harder, it felt pretty good, but then, once I was fully erect, it started being painful. My pp was stuck in the DVD, and I had to break it in half to get if out. It was then when I flipped the broken DVD over and realized that it was not a blank DVD, but a copy of the Pixar movie Up.. Well guys, guess I fucked up.
April 2022

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Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom" He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a swift kick down the stairs. As Dex yelps loudly in pain, Kripp overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this game!" as loudly as he can. Rania tries to calm him down, but Kripp swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Kripp wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
January 2018
Kripp

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You have been gifted the Golden Kappa!

twitchquotes: โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€” imGlitch You have been gifted the Golden Kappa!โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”โ€”
twitch chat
January 2017

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Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss

In Japan ๐Ÿ‡ฏ๐Ÿ‡ต , heart surgeon โค๏ธ๐Ÿ‘จโ€โš•๏ธ . Number one ๐Ÿ˜ญโ˜๏ธ . Steady hand๐Ÿ˜ณโœ‹๏ธ. One day, Yakuza boss ๐Ÿ™‡๐Ÿปneed ๐Ÿ†• heart๐Ÿ’˜. I do operation๐Ÿ”ชโš”๏ธ. But, mistake๐Ÿ˜ฑ! Yakuza boss die๐Ÿ˜ต๐Ÿ˜ช! Yakuza very mad๐Ÿ‘ฟ. I hide๐Ÿ™ˆ in fishing boat๐ŸŸ๐Ÿšฃ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ, come to America๐ŸŽ‡๐ŸŽŠ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธ. No english๐Ÿค, no food๐Ÿ˜ฉ, no money๐Ÿ“‰๐Ÿšซ๐Ÿ’ฒ. Darryl ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿฟgive me job๐Ÿ™Œ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿปโ€๐Ÿ’ผ. Now I have house๐Ÿก, American car ๐Ÿš— , and new woman ๐Ÿ†•๐Ÿ‘ฑ๐Ÿปโ€โ™€๏ธ. Darryl ๐Ÿ‘จ๐Ÿฟsave lifeโ›‘. My big secret๐Ÿ™Š: I kill โ˜ ๏ธyakuza boss on purpose๐Ÿ˜ˆ. I good ๐Ÿ‘surgeon. The best๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ’ฏ!
July 2019

Emoji Pasta

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