[Copypasta] I'm not your typical 12 year old

twitchquotes: I'm twelve but everyone says I am very mature for my age and say I'm basically 16. Also, I love real bands like AC/DC and punk rock like green day so I'm not your typical 12 year old.
twitch chat
December 2018
Waiting for adblock to be disabled
More Copypastas

It can never be opposite day

It can never be opposite day. When ever you say "HEY IT'S OPPOSITE DAY!" the opposite would apply therefor it would not be opposite day. Also if you say "IT'S NOT OPPOSITE DAY!" the affect is not applied.
February 2021

Kappa Nazi

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–’β–“β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–’β–“β–’β–ˆβ–’β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–“β–’β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–’β–’β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–“β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–’β–‘ β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–“β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–“β–€β–„β–„β–„β–“β–’β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–ˆβ–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘
November 2014

Can you please stop making me sweat for more salt?

twitchquotes: reynad, everytime I watch you I start sweating, I believe this is because you have the power to harvest salt through my pores even through the internet, can you please stop making me sweat for more salt?
twitch chat
November 2014
Reynad

salty

How traders politely decline the second date

I discovered recently if I am on a date and I’m not that interested in a second, all I need to do is start talking about my stocks. They won’t ask for another one then, I won’t have to politely decline.
December 2021

WallStreetBets

Am I The Asshole for not being able to trade options for my dad? I’m 6.

This started about 4 years ago when I was 2 years old. My dad started to supplement me picture books and cartoons with beginner options books and Martin Shkerli's live videos on how to pick pharmaceutical stocks. Over the course of these years I have retained absolutely nothing even though my dad has spent every waking minute trying to make me understand. He has done almost everything including having Jerome Powell's speeches play while I am sleeping and only having Warren Buffet on the TV to try and make me understand the market. Yesterday, he got to a breaking point when I couldn't differentiate between a straddle and a strangle even though we went through different strategies for almost a month straight. My dad finally convinced my mom that they were doing the right thing when he said that I will soon be a Wendy's worker begging my wife's husband for a weekly allowance because I will never amount to be anything. He couldn't fathom raising a kid who was not able to able to make a profit from trading options by the time he was 10. With all that said, if anyone wants a 6 year old child who is shitty at market strategy, plz adopt me from Eternal Sunny Orphanage in Omaha, Nebraska.
September 2021

WallStreetBets

Am I The Asshole?

Text-to-Speech Playing