[Copypasta] Flex Tape

twitchquotes: To show you the power of Flex Tape, I SAWED THIS BOAT IN HALF and repaired it with only Flex Tape. Not only does Flex Tape's powerful adhesive hold the boat together, but it creates a super strong, water-tight seal so the inside is completely dry. YEE DOGGIE! Just cut, peel, stick, and seal. Imagine everything you can do with the power of Flex Tape!
twitch chat
August 2018
What happened to this ad? :(
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Ultra Variety Pack bag of Dongers

twitchquotes: ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ ༼ ºل͟º ༽ ୧༼ ͡◉ل͜ ͡◉༽୨ (ง ͠° ل͜ °)ง ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ﾉ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨乁( ◔ ౪◔)ㄏ─=≡Σ((( つ◕ل͜◕)つ (ง •̀_•́)ง┌(° ͜ʖ͡°)┘(ง ͠ ͠° ل͜ °)งᕙ༼◕ل͜◕༽ᕗ Sorry, I dropped my Ultra Variety Pack™ bag of Dongers. ༼ຈل͜ຈ༽ﾉ ༼ ºل͟º ༽ ୧༼ ͡◉ل͜ ͡◉༽୨ (ง ͠° ل͜ °)ง ヽ༼ʘ̚ل͜ʘ̚༽ﾉ୧༼ಠ益ಠ༽୨乁( ◔ ౪◔)ㄏ─=≡Σ((( つ◕ل͜◕)つ (ง •̀_•́)ง┌(° ͜ʖ͡°)┘(ง ͠ ͠° ل͜ °)งᕙ༼◕ل͜◕༽ᕗ
twitch chat
June 2014
Kripp

Would you like to get rich by running your own business

Hey👋 ladies💁‍♀️ 📷 Would 😍 you 👈 like 👍 to 2️⃣ get 😮 rich 💰💰💰 by running 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️ your 👈 own business 👩‍💼💼 from home 🏡 with just ☝ your phone? 📱🤳 Well 🤷‍♀️ you can't. 😂 Get 👏 a 👏 real 👏 job 👏 you 👏 stupid 👏 cunt
March 2021

Emoji Pasta

Garfield

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡴⠞⠉⢉⣭⣿⣿⠿⣳⣤⠴⠖⠛⣛⣿⣿⡷⠖⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣼⠁⢀⣶⢻⡟⠿⠋⣴⠿⢻⣧⡴⠟⠋⠿⠛⠠⠾⢛⣵⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣿⡿⢶⣄⠀⢀⡇⢀⡿⠁⠈⠀⠀⣀⣉⣀⠘⣿⠀⠀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠛⡹⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣭⣤⡈⢑⣼⣻⣿⣧⡌⠁⠀⢀⣴⠟⠋⠉⠉⠛⣿⣴⠟⠋⠙⠻⣦⡰⣞⠁⢀⣤⣦⣤⠀ ⠀⠀⣰⢫⣾⠋⣽⠟⠑⠛⢠⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⡄⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⡈⠻⣍⠤⢤⣌⣀ ⢀⡞⣡⡌⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⡀⠀⠀⠀⠸⣇⠀⢾⣷⢤⣬⣉ ⡞⣼⣿⣤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠸⣿⣇⠈⠻ ⢰⣿⡿⢹⠃⠀⣠⠤⠶⣼⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⣿⠛⡄⠀ ⠈⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⡟⡀⠀⠈⡗⠲⠶⠦⢤⣤⣤⣄⣀⣀⣸⣧⣤⣤⠤⠤⣿⣀⡀⠉⣼⡇⠀ ⣿⣴⣴⡆⠀⠀⠻⣄⠀⠀⠡⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⡈⠀⠻⠟⠀⢀⠋⠉⠙⢷⡿⡇⠀ ⣻⡿⠏⠁⠀⠀⢠⡟⠀⠀⠀⠣⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠈⠀⢀⣀⡾⣴⠃⠀ ⢿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠢⠄⣀⠠⠼⣁⠀⡱⠤⠤⠐⠁⠀⠀⣸⠋⢻⡟⠀⠀ ⠈⢧⣀⣤⣶⡄⠘⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣤⠖⠛⠻⣄⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⡾⠋⢀⡞⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠻⣿⣿⡇⠀⠈⠓⢦⣤⣤⣤⡤⠞⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠒⠚⢩⡅⣠⡴⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⢧⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⣻⠿⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠓⠶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⡴⠖⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
ascii art
September 2019

Give me a second guys, Dex says

twitchquotes: "Give me a second, guys," Dex says. "Gotta hit up the mailman" He turns down the volume on his bork, and immediately gives Kripp a swift kick down the stairs. As Kripp yelps loudly in pain, Dex overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this delivery!" as loudly as he can. Fey tries to calm him down, but Dex swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Dex wipes the blood off of his snout, sits back down at his ball, and resumes being a good doggy
twitch chat
January 2019
Kripp

GME bank consultation

Short story-time for amusement reasons only: some days ago, I went to my bank (Austria). I am the owner of quite a number of GME shares and my broker app is actually just the bank-intern bond trading app, where I need to pay transactional feed everytime I buy (what is sell?) GME shares. I informed myself about the reasoning of those transactional fees beforehand and found out that by paying them, I have the right of consultation by my bank about the shares they‘re trading/I‘m buying. So, I went to the main national building of my bank, they were really friendly at the beginning, enthustiatically, I mentioned GME to them and that I wish for professional consultation about the financial details involved with that stock (I am not a financial guy, actually, I don‘t exactly know what‘s going on, it‘s all pretty crazy to me). Suddenly, their posture and mimick changed pretty suddenly. I was told, they are not allowed to consult about GME. To my question, why this was the case, they told me, because GME is „too irrelevant for the big stock market“. They are „aware of the past short squeeze, but one should no longer focus on GME“. They acted as if GME was some „childish financial playground“ that should be forgotten about. When I confronted them with the huge recent naked short attacks and if they could explain to me possible effects of them if they were not covered, they just repeated themselves how „GME is not relevant, please focus on stocks like Apple or Amazon to be safe“. I left the bank, buying more GME shares.
April 2021

WallStreetBets

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