[Copypasta] A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage

twitchquotes: A few feet offscreen, Dex sits in a cage far too small for himself. Malnourished because of his "vegan" diet, his ribs are clearly visible through his coat. He barely has the energy to move, let alone enjoy life. Yet, he knows there's hope. He knows he could draw attention to himself, as he hears Kripp constantly talking to someone. In a single act of defiance, Dex barks to draw attention to his dire situation. "Quiet, Dex" is his only reply as Kripp ignores his pleas yet again.
twitch chat
March 2018
Kripp
I used to be a real ad
More Kripp Copypastas

Real hardcore gamers play at least 4 games at a time

twitchquotes: οΌ’ games at ο½”ο½ˆο½… same ο½”ο½‰ο½ο½…οΌŸ ο½†ο½‰ο½Œο½”ο½ˆο½™ ο½ƒο½ο½“ο½•ο½ο½ŒοΌŽ ο½’ο½…ο½ο½Œ ο½ˆο½ο½’ο½„ο½ƒο½ο½’ο½… gamers ο½ο½Œο½ο½™ at ο½Œο½…ο½ο½“ο½” οΌ” games ο½—ο½‰ο½”ο½ˆ ο½ο½Žο½… ο½ˆο½ο½Žο½„ tied ο½‚ο½…ο½ˆο½‰ο½Žο½„ ο½”ο½ˆο½…ο½‰ο½’ ο½‚ο½ο½ƒο½‹οΌŽ ο½“ο½…ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½•ο½“ο½Œο½™ ο½‹ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½οΌŒ if you ο½—ο½ο½Žο½” to keep your viewers you better step it ο½•ο½οΌŽ ο½“ο½‰ο½Žο½ƒο½…ο½’ο½…ο½Œο½™οΌŒ a ο½“ο½ο½ο½Ž to be ο½…ο½˜οΌο½‹ο½’ο½‰ο½ο½ο½Œο½…ο½”
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp

Joseph Kony's message to Kripp

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, I am famous child soldier militia commander Joseph Kony. I want to help you make your own child soldier militia too so we can fight the white man as one. I hope you make the right decision and remember, dongerino dongerino please no copi pasterino banerino Al Pacino cappuccino orange moccha frappuccino steal your kiderino.
twitch chat
March 2014
Kripp

NaCl deficiency disorder

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp, your stream has changed my life completely. I suffer from severe NaCl (salt) deficiency disorder. I had to visit the hospital 5 times a week for salt injections. However, watching your stream supplies me enough salt through the screen. You saved me money time and effort. I can't thank you enough. I owe u my life.
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

salty

Kripp, this is the value-police

twitchquotes: (β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β–€ΜΏ ΜΏ) Kripp, this is the value-police. We are under the impression that you have 1 too many Priestesses of Elune in your deck, please fix this or come with us.(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β–€ΜΏ ΜΏ)
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

Kripp

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–€β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–“β–„β–‘ β–‘β–β–“β–“β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–Œ ░▐▓▒░░▄▒▒▓▄▄▒▒▒░▒▄▄▄▒▒▓ β–‘β–“β–“β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ ░▐▓░░░░▒▒▓▓▓░░░▒▓▓▓▓▓▒▓ β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’ β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–“β–€β–€β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–’β–’β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–„β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–“β–“β–’β–“β–„β–“β–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–€β–’β–„
November 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing