[Copypasta] Somebody I used to know

twitchquotes: I hate when people quote songs in their spam... it reminds me of Somebody I Used to Know
twitch chat
March 2015
I used to be a real ad
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I sexually Identify as a WEEB

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as a WEEB. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of AYAYA. People say to me that a person being a WEEB is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm cute. From now on I want you guys to call me "AYAYA-CHAN" and respect my right to be cute. If you can't accept me you're a racist and need to check your privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
twitch chat
May 2019

Weebs

Tiffany's chandelier

twitchquotes: I break into Tiffany's at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it's priceless. As I'm taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It's her father's business. She's Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don't trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he's the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She's been waiting for me all these years. She's never taken another lover. I don't care. I don't show up. I go to Berlin. That's where I stashed the chandelier.
twitch chat
November 2018

Iron Man

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–„โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
September 2021

Donald Trump answers what is 2+2?

Donald Trump answers the question: What is 2+2? "I have to say a lot of people have been asking this question. No, really. A lot of people come up to me and they ask me. They say, "What's 2+2"? And I tell them look, we know what 2+2 is. We've had almost eight years of the worst kind of math you can imagine. Oh my god, I can't believe it. Addition and subtraction of the 1s the 2s and the 3s. Its terrible. Its just terrible. Look, if you want to know what 2+2 is, do you want to know what 2+2 is? I'll tell you. First of all the number 2, by the way I love the number 2. It's probably my favorite number, no it is my favorite number. You know what, it's probably more like the number two but with a lot of zeros behind it. A lot. If I'm being honest, I mean, if I'm being honest. I like a lot of zeros. Except for Marco Rubio, now he's a zero that I don't like. Though, I probably shouldn't say that. He's a nice guy but he's like, "10101000101", on and on, like that. He's like a computer! You know what I mean? He's like a computer. I don't know. I mean, you know. So, we have all these numbers and we can add them and subtract them and add them. TIMES them even. Did you know that? We can times them OR divide them, they don't tell you that, and I'll tell you, no one is better at the order of operations than me. You wouldn't believe it. That I can tell you. So, we're gonna be the best on 2+2, believe me. OK? Alright. Thank you."
October 2016

Donald Trump

So as a joke, I fucked my friend in a Pekora cosplay

So as a joke, I went to my friend's house wearing Pekora's wig and clothes. I could barely stop my laughter as he went as red as a tomato and looked at me from head to toe with a bit of drool in his mouth. The way he stared made mde feel a bit funny too, but I decided to tease him more by taking off my clothes. He asked me, "Are you serious?" and I said "Yep peko." He went silent for what seemed like forever, so I asked him, "What's the matter peko?" He said he's confused, but then his boner got really hard, which made me take off his clothes. I expected him to scream, "Stop!" as I kissed him and stroked his cock, but he instead shouted "Oh God, Pekora!" which made me get a boner myself. Before I knew it, I was blowing him for the first time till he came. His semen was so thick, it got stuck inside my throat no matter how hard I swallowed. He then said, "I want to fuck you now!" and seeing that we've already gone that far and we were both naked, I obliged. A few hours later, the jerk went all pale and said to me "Why did we do that? Now I'm not fucking straight." But he still looked so cute all confused like that, so I took pity on him and reassured while wiping his cum off my face, "Let's just pretend I'ms till Pekora."
September 2021
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