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March 2014
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Monster Amogus Crewmate With Tongue

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⡶⠛⠛⠶⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣤⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⡶⢿⡿⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣽⡗⠲⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠴⠯⠭⣉⠙⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⣴⠟⠉⠀⡼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⡏⡇⡘⠓⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢯⣀⠀⠀⣈⠆⢹⣦⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⡾⠋⠀⠀⣸⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⡞⢠⣿⣢⣌⣳⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠏⠉⡉⠁⠀⣸⢹⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⢠⡿⠁⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡾⢁⡇⢸⢇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣧⠤⠒⡎⢀⣠⠴⠯⣞⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡾⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⠞⠁⡎⣰⣇⠀⠙⣶⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⠋⠀⠀⠀⠛⠛⠓⠒⠦⣄⠙⠳⣄⠀⠀ ⢰⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⠿⣶⣶⣶⠿⠋⠀⢠⠀⡿⠛⣛⣿⠿⣿⡖⠒⠒⠲⠦⠤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠙⢷⣤⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀⠑⠀⠘⢦⠀ ⢸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⢃⡜⠙⠾⡋⠀⠀⠘⣿⡄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠒⠶⣦⣿⣿⣾⠛⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣟⡆⠀⠘⣧ ⠀⢧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡇⢸⡶⢦⣴⠿⠆⠶⣿⡛⢿⡖⠦⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠛⠧⠄⣀⣀⠀⣀⣼⡟⠁⠀⠀⣿ ⠀⠈⢷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡞⢠⠟⠦⡀⠙⠳⠤⣀⠈⠛⠾⣷⡀⢧⡜⠛⢷⢦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⢹⣷⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⠃⣼⣷⣶⡿⣶⠀⠀⢀⣷⡀⠀⠘⣿⣿⣧⠀⠈⠾⣏⠛⠻⣶⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⣾⡿ ⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⠉⠛⠶⢤⣄⣀⢀⡇⣼⣋⠭⣿⢃⠙⡟⢉⣿⠀⢳⡀⢰⣿⠉⢿⠇⠀⣰⠙⣆⠀⠘⣮⠉⠛⠻⠶⢶⣶⣶⣾⠿⠟⠋⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠻⣦⣄⠀⠀⣀⢀⠝⢙⣧⣌⡉⠛⠛⠿⠴⠿⠿⠷⠆⣀⣷⣼⣇⣆⡈⣧⣴⣿⣃⣘⣆⠀⢸⠀⣠⠖⠊⠉⢱⢸⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⣿⠷⠋⢠⠞⣿⠁⠙⢦⡼⠛⠉⠑⠒⣶⢰⡖⠲⠴⠠⠔⠫⢭⡄⠀⣠⣠⡌⣷⢸⡀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠻⠼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣶⣮⡥⠔⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣼⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢳⢀⡇⠀⠻⣿⢸⠀⣧⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣧⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⠁⠀⠀⢻⢸⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣦⣀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⠘⠦⠟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⣿⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣠⡤⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡟⠉⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣸⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣷⣄⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣠⣼⠇⠀⠘⣧⣄⣀⣀⣀⣠⣤⣾⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
May 2022

Among Us / Amogus

I saw Flying Lotus at a grocery store

twitchquotes: I saw Flying Lotus at a grocery store in Los Angeles yesterday. I told him how cool it was to meet him in person, but I didn’t want to be a douche and bother him and ask him for photos or anything. He said, “Oh, like you’re doing now?” I was taken aback, and all I could say was “Huh?” but he kept cutting me off and going “huh? huh? huh?” and closing his hand shut in front of my face. I walked away and continued with my shopping, and I heard him chuckle as I walked off. When I came to pay for my stuff up front I saw him trying to walk out the doors with like fifteen Milky Ways in his hands without paying. The girl at the counter was very nice about it and professional, and was like “Sir, you need to pay for those first.” At first he kept pretending to be tired and not hear her, but eventually turned back around and brought them to the counter. When she took one of the bars and started scanning it multiple times, he stopped her and told her to scan them each individually “to prevent any electrical infetterence,” and then turned around and winked at me. I don’t even think that’s a word. After she scanned each bar and put them in a bag and started to say the price, he kept interrupting her by yawning really loudly.
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November 2019

Mr Bear song (that's where your hopes go to die)

Well There's all sorts of creatures, down on Dangley Doodle Farm. Like wise old Mr Octopus, with way too many arms! There's Mr Pig! And Mr Cow! They're always in good moods. But That's cause they don't know they'll soon be sliced up into food! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where your hopes go to turn into despair. Mr Bear! What's That over there? That's where your dreams go to die! Mr Racoon! Wants to go to the moon. He'll end up as a bus driver soon! Mr Porcupine! Thinks he'll read the news at nine, he'll end up as a janitor, who stinks of turpentine. Mr Tiny Mouse! Thought he'd own a massive house. Ended up in a bed sit where he can't control the louse! Mr Horse! Though he'd go into professional sports. Now he's an alcoholic and he's on his third divorce! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's the place your life becomes an endless questionnaire! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where your hopes go to die. Lower your expectations! Maybe you could get a job in telecommunications. No matter how you try you'll never reach the League of Nations. The best you'll get is middle rank in trading operations! So lower your expectations! You'll never win an oscar, so there's no congratulations. The future that is coming will not meet specifications. And no amount of visualisations will save you from your own deterioration Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's the tramp who thought he'd be a multimillionaire! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where self-esteem goes to die. Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's the disappointment that is waiting everywhere! Mr Bear! What's that over there? That's where your schemes go to die! That's where your dreams go to die! That's where dreams go to die!
April 2022

Moishe from Hebrew School

twitchquotes: So you're going by Reckful now nerd? Haha whats up douche bag, it's Moishe from Hebrew School. Remember me? Me and the guys used to give you a hard time in Torah class. Sorry you were just an easy target lol. I can see not much has changed. Remember Ziva the girl you had a crush on? Yeah we're married now according to the customs of HaShem. I make over 200k a year and am an accomplished Rabbi. I guess some things never change huh loser? Nice catching up lol. Pathetic.
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July 2019
Reckful

Tanner from High School

This is the shittiest reply ever Overwatch version

twitchquotes: This is the shittiest reply ever. Overwatch requires camping, booping, stunning, sleeping, hacking, slamming, aimbotting and hitting shots. There are not “positions” in Overwatch. A kickers job is LITERALLY to kick. Horrible analogy, kind of embarrassing.
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December 2019
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