[Copypasta] Hi, my name is Bill Gates and today I’ll teach you how to count to ten

twitchquotes: Hi, my name is Bill Gates and today I’ll teach you how to count to ten: 1, 2, 3, 95, 98, NT, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 10
twitch chat
October 2014

Classic

I used to be a real ad
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Red sus. Red suuuus

Red sus. Red suuuus. I said red, sus, hahahahaha. Why arent you laughing? I just made a reference to the popular video game "Among Us"! How can you not laugh at it? Emergeny meeting! Guys, this here guy doesnt laugh at my funny Among Us memes! Lets beat him to death! Dead body reported! Skip! Skip! Vote blue! Blue was not an impostor. Among us in a nutshell hahahaha. What?! Youre still not laughing your ass off? I made SEVERAL funny references to Among Us and YOU STILL ARENT LAUGHING??!!! Bruh. Ya hear that? Wooooooosh. Whats woooosh? Oh, nothing. Just the sound of a joke flying over your head. Whats that? You think im annoying? Kinda sus, bro. Hahahaha! Anyway, yea, gotta go do tasks. Hahahaha!
October 2020

Among Us / Amogus

Classic

Please refrain from likening us to plebeians

twitchquotes: Twitch streamers and their subscribers define us (not subscribed audience) as members of a lower social class, plebs as they call it. I find it inappropriate to compare us with ancient Rome's lowest class as there is nothing ignominious to being a member of the proletariat. Also their living standards were significantly inferior to ours (e.g. health, education) so the comparison is unsound. In the future, please refrain from likening us to plebeians because descriminating due to economic and social status like that is reprehensible in our modern society.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

plebs vs subs

Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya

twitchquotes: ヽ༼ Ν  Ν Β°γ€œ ΝœΚ–γ€œ Ν  Ν Β° ΰΌ½οΎ‰Β€=[β€”β€”β€”β€” Hello. My name is Inigo Dongtoya. You killed my Kappa. Prepare to die.
twitch chat
March 2015

Classic

I like to creep around my home and act like a goblin

I like to creep around my home and act like a goblin I don’t know why but I just enjoy doing this. Maybe it’s my way of dealing with stress or something but I just do it about once every week. Generally I’ll carry around a sack and creep around in a sort of crouch-walking position making goblin noises, then I’ll walk around my house and pick up various different β€œtrinkets” and put them in my bag while saying stuff like β€œI’ll be having that” and laughing maniacally in my goblin voice (β€œtrinkets” can include anything from shit I find on the ground to cutlery or other utensils). The other day I was talking with my neighbours and they mentioned hearing weird noises like what I wrote about and I was just internally screaming the entire conversation. I’m 99% sure they don’t know it’s me but god that 1% chance is seriously weighing on my mind.
July 2022

Classic

Confessions

Kappa

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–’β–“β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–€β–„β–‘β–‘ β–„β–€β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–’β–’β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–’β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘ β–‘β–€β–„β–“β–‘β–‘β–’β–€β–“β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘ β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–„β–„β–’β–€β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–„β–’β–„β–„β–„β–’β–’β–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–’β–’β–„β–€β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–„β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–„β–€β–‘β–‘β–‘
ascii art
November 2014

Classic

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Text-to-Speech Playing