[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
I used to be a real ad
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This is Morde’s mom

twitchquotes: Hi David, this is Morde’s mom. I noticed you haven’t been picking my son for your team in gym class. Morde has been having a really tough time since his dad and I split up, and it doesn’t make it easy on him when you reroll and say, „We’re never taking Morde.“ I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if someone said that about you. Morde has phantom synergy, knight synergy, and he can hit 2 units! Why don’t you try being a bit more inclusive?
twitch chat
July 2019
dogdog

Teamfight Tactics

Response to the Vaporeon copypasta (Vaporeons are dangerous)

Hey guys did you know that in terms of water Pokemon inland, Vaporeon would be very capable of hunting grown humans? Their bodies being the size of a medium dog and weight are just enough to pounce on a man and throw him to the ground. Their bulky stats would allow them to shrug off and outlast any attempts by the human to fight them off, and that's not getting even into moves like Hydro Pump and Scald. But that's not all these water dogs have up their sleeves. Their bodies being so similar to water not only lets them hide in bodies of water and become nearly invisible to catch prey off guard, but allows them to enter the body through almost any orifice. Things do not get any better once a Vaporeon is inside of you. If asphyxiation doesn't kill you, the internal bleeding and displacement of internal organs certainly will. In addition, they are able to learn Charm, allowing them to take advantage of certain... desires humans may have and create even more opportunities to go in for the kill. But wait, there's more. Since Vaporeon is an omnivore, its cells would need to be able to digest proteins, such as those in meat. This only opens even more possibilities as to what these creatures are capable of.
March 2022

Pokemon

PUCK THE FLEBS

twitchquotes: PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS forsenGASM forsenGun PUCK THE FLEBS
twitch chat
March 2016
Forsen

plebs vs subs

I'm an elite smash pro

twitchquotes: Excuse me??? I'll have you know that I'm an elite smash pro in the smash ultimate leaderboards kid. I'm not gonna take any sort of disrespect from you, I've carved a name for myself in smash history bud. You're a nobody, Sakurai personally looks at all my matches to balance the game and I could get you shitty main nerfed to the floor if I fucking wanted to so watch your back you nobody.
twitch chat
March 2019

Super Smash Bros

Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, this is Willy Vegansaurus the Herbivorous Dinosaur from 194 B.C .... I came to warn you about the extinction of Herbivores and the 'never lucky' curse it bestows on us. Kripp, you must eat meat immediately! If you don't, a giant "MEAT-EOR" will crash into earth and extinct us all... again... Us Herbivores were wrong. WE WERE WRONG! WutFace
twitch chat
April 2017
Kripp

Hearthstone

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