[Copypasta] This message legally certifies that I was here

twitchquotes: This message marks my place as a viewer at this moment, and hereby certifies that I "was here" for any and all subsequent significant events in the near future. This message contains no other particular information, and does not imply any endorsement of, nor involvement in, the events which occur. This message is signed by Twitch authentication and dated by chatroom timestamp, and hence is legally binding.
twitch chat
February 2022
I used to be a real ad
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we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce

gf is prego we like to get kinky anyways one night things get particularly saucy i'm sticking my noodle in her when I notice weird fucking chunks coming out, so I turn on the lights wtf it's red everywhere and she's obviously not on her period i look up at her, she's got a glassy, jarred look on her face and she's not answering ohshitohshitohshitohshit i rush her into my car and speed all the way to the hospital she's still bleeding everywhere by the time we get there, she's not bleeding much anymore, but all the color has drained and she looks colorless and almost transparent oh shit, she looks like she's in a vegetative state storm into to the emergency room, cary her to the nearest doctor and explain eveything he takes one look at ther and says "sir, i'm sorry, there's nothing we can do" "WHY THE FUCK NOT???" "we don't operate on empty jars of spaghetti sauce"
February 2021

Classic

FeelsGoodMan

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠉⠉⠉⠛⠻⣿⣿⠿⠛⠛⠙⠛⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⡀⠀⠈⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⠏⠀⠀⠀⠔⠉⠁⠀⠀⠈⠉⠓⢼⡤⠔⠒⠀⠐⠒⠢⠌⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠤⣒⠶⠤⠭⠭⢝⡢⣄⢤⣄⣒⡶⠶⣶⣢⡝⢿⣿ ⡿⠋⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠲⠮⢕⣽⠖⢩⠉⠙⣷⣶⣮⡍⢉⣴⠆⣭⢉⠑⣶⣮⣅⢻ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠒⠒⠻⣿⣄⠤⠘⢃⣿⣿⡿⠫⣿⣿⣄⠤⠘⢃⣿⣿⠿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠓⠤⠭⣥⣀⣉⡩⡥⠴⠃⠀⠈⠉⠁⠈⠉⠁⣴⣾⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⠤⠔⠊⠀⠀⠀⠓⠲⡤⠤⠖⠐⢿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢻⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⡻⢷⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣘⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⡀⠀⠙⢿⣷⣽⣽⣛⣟⣻⠷⠶⢶⣦⣤⣤⣤⣤⣶⠾⠟⣯⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠂⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠻⠿⠿⠿⠿⠶⠶⠶⠶⠾⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿ ⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣤⣟⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ascii art
September 2020

Pepe

I need help typing

twitchquotes: i need help typing, im new to the americas and i dont know how to english very well can someone help me? pleasew stop spamming chat so i can learn please....without this i wont pass my english class iand ill get deported please...
twitch chat
November 2014
TidesOfTime

The Tuck Frump movement started in 1944

twitchquotes: The Tuck Frump movement started in 1944 as a splinter group of the French Resistance. Though initially suppressed by the Nazi superweapon "U-Boat mode", the movement gained strength as the war went on. Today we honor the brave veterans that stood against facism with their rallying cry, Tuck Frump.
twitch chat
January 2015
Trump
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