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February 2022
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Police clearing out a homeless encampment

On my way into the office today I saw the police clearing out a homeless encampment under a bridge, forcing them into the cold and rain. I keep playing it over in my head and haven’t been able to focus on work all day because of my erection.
January 2021

WallStreetBets

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise?

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth JPOW The Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Motley Fool would tell you. It’s a πŸ³οΈβ€πŸŒˆπŸ» legend. Darth JPOW was a Dark Lord of the FED, so gay and such a bear he could use his money printer to influence the economy to create inflation… He had such a knowledge of the economy that he could even keep stonk prices from falling. The dark side of the economy is a pathway to many abilities some consider to be… transitory. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his tendies, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught Nancy Pelosi everything he knew, then she sold at the top. Ironic. He could save others from market corrections, but not himself.
May 2022

WallStreetBets

TriHard

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–“β–“β–ˆβ–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–„β–‘ β–€β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–Œ β–‘β–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–’β–’β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–Œβ–’β–„β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–β–’β–‘β–’β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–“β–β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ ░░░░▐▒▒▒▒▒▄▄▐░░▐░░░░ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–’β–„β–“β–“β–’β–“β–„β–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–“β–β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–’β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–‘β–€β–„β–„β–Œβ–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘
November 2014

amogus is NOT funny

Oh so you said "AMOGUS". you think that's funny? well listen here you idiot, amogus is not funny. there is nothing funny about saying amogus. it just shows how braindead you are that a single misspelled word is what constitutes as humor for you. it is so dumb how you think that replying amogus to me makes you some sort of comedic genius. among us, is a DEAD game, and amogus is a STUPID meme. nobody cares about amogus, so stop sending stupid copypastas or making amogus jokes. you dont look funny, you look like an idiot, and dont make this into some stupid ironic copypasta ok?
May 2021

Among Us / Amogus

Anime ass

March 2021

Weebs

NSFW

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