What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Tuck me
twitchquotes:
Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β° γγ γγ γ γ γ Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β° γ γγ γγtuck me γγγ γ γγ γ γ γ Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β° γ γγ γγ γ γ γ Ν‘Β° ΝΚ Ν‘Β°
twitch chat
Kripp
Apple announces an EV program
Oh boy I can't wait until 2024 when I can wake up to my Apple Homepod Siri alarm and check my Apple Watch for notifications and take a shower in my Apple Big Douche then put my makeup on before work in my Apple Mirror then take my Apple Car to my job at Apple Phone Plant #584 so I can work on my Mac Pro workstation designing the latest Apple Product the iShit smart toilet that syncs with your iAsshole to sense when you have a massive log brewing in my large intestine and sends me a notification to my apple colonoscopy bag. Russian hackers will know what I had for dinner.
WallStreetBets
Kripp's gotta hit up the bathroom
twitchquotes:
"Give me a second, guys," Kripp says. "Gotta hit up the bathroom" He turns down the volume on his microphone, and immediately gives Dex a swift kick down the stairs. As Dex yelps loudly in pain, Kripp overturns the nearest chair, yelling "Fuck this game!" as loudly as he can. Rania tries to calm him down, but Kripp swiftly bodyslams her onto a glass coffee table. After taking a few deep breaths, Kripp wipes the blood off of his face, sits back down at his computer, and resumes his stream.
twitch chat
Kripp
Classic
βRatioβ shut up. Shut the fuck up
βRatioβ shut up. Shut the fuck up. Nobody cares! Youβre gonna get the negative side of this ratio that you so care about. Shut the fuck up. I thought Reddit was bad enough but now itβs borrowing from Twitter. Nobody gives a shit about the like ratio, nobody gives a shit about your retarded comment. Take my advice and shut the fuck up!
Stuck in Kripp's basement
twitchquotes:
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twitch chat
Kripp