[Copypasta] YOU. ME. GAS STATION.

What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
January 2022
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Megaman

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–€β–€β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–‘β–€β–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–€β–€β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–„β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–‘ β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘ β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘ β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–€β–‘β–€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–‘ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ
November 2014

Please stop spamming, for Bernard

twitchquotes: Guys please stop spamming. My dog, Bernard, looked at my chat and got so dizzy because of the spam that he fell down and hit his noggin right on his food bowl! He couldn't talk for hours. Please stop spamming, for Bernard.
twitch chat
December 2014

Classic

Stream snipers

twitchquotes: One day, the Papa asks Kripp to go fishing, Kripp shrugs, β€œAlright, but catch and release only – I’m vegan.” They arrive at the local pristine clear waters of an Ontario stream brimming with wild trout and prepare to fish. Suddenly Kripp shouts, β€œGet down!”. A crack sounds through the air, and the Papa sees Kripp on the ground bleeding. His final words are, β€œFucking stream snipers.”
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

Hearthstone

hey there buddy chum pal friend

twitchquotes: hey there buddy chum pal friend buddy pal chum bud friend fella bruther amigo pal buddy friend chummy chum chum pal i don't mean to be rude my friend pal home slice bread slice dawg but i gotta warn ya if u take one more diddly darn step right there im going to have to diddly darn snap ur neck and wowza wouldn't that be a crummy juncture, huh? do yuo want that? do wish upon yourself to come into physical experience with a crummy juncture? because friend buddy chum friend chum pally pal chum friend if you keep this up well gosh diddly darn i just might have to get not so friendly with u my friendly friend friend pal friend buddy chum pally friend chum buddy...
twitch chat
October 2020

Classic

乇乂ㄒ尺卂 δΈ‚ε±±ε£δΉšε£

twitchquotes: In japan we don't say 'I love Star Wars' we say 乇乂ㄒ尺卂 δΈ‚ε±±ε£δΉšε£ which doesn't mean anything it just spells out 'I wanna fuck Ben Swolo' in japanese symbols.
twitch chat
January 2018
Text-to-Speech Playing