[Copypasta] YOU. ME. GAS STATION.

What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
January 2022
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

I sexually Identify as your mom

twitchquotes: I sexually Identify as your mom. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of cooking for your father and you and fuck your father and make you more sisters. People say to me that a person being your mom is Impossible and I'm fucking retarded but I don't care, I'm beautiful. im gonna marry your father. From now on I want you guys to call me " Mommy" and respect my right to cook food and fuck your father. If you can't accept me you're a mommyphobic and need to check if your mom is still alive. Thank you for being so understanding
twitch chat
September 2019

I sexually Identify as

A severe lack of cute emotes in chat

twitchquotes: Konichiwa Kripp-kun AYAYA . This is your kawaii kouhai Aya-chan, calling in from Nihon. I have noticed a severe lack of cute emotes in chat tonight, and instead all I see are baka dansgame and baka nammers. This is not very sugoi, and I would appreciate it if your chat showed more respect for Japanese culture by typing kawaii emotes like AYAYA and AstolfoSmile . Arigato gozaimasu <3
twitch chat
February 2019
Kripp

Weebs

Classic

Lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army

twitchquotes: Dear Kripp, this is lieutenant Clitt Nippley of the Greek Army. It has come to our attention that you've been 'BroFisting' many of our citizens against their will. If you continue this, I have full authority to launch a nuclear attack against you and your evil 5 dollar club. You've been warned.
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp

FeelsRainMan

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠻⠿⣿⡇⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣮⡙⠿⣿ ⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠖⠀⣀⡈⢭⣉⠩⣭⣉⣐⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣌ ⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣮⠙⢋⣴⠞⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡌⢿⣿⣿⣷⣦⡉⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣷⣦⡙⢿⠟⣡⣾⣶⡌⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣉⠻⢿⣿⡌⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣙⠿⣿ ⢿⣿⠟⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣦⣍⠻⠌⣿⣿⡿⢟⣛⣛⣭⣭⣥⣌ ⡶⢀⣾⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⢀⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠀⢴⣶⣬⣬⣈⣵⣾⣦⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣥⣥⣶⠖⠀⠀⠤⠂⠀⠒⠠⢥⡠⠤⠤⢄⡈⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡙⢿⣿⣿ ⢿⡿⢫⠀⠀⠀⢀⡤⠦⠂⠉⠉⠵⠄⠤⠀⠐⠒⠌⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣿⣿ ⡆⠁⠀⠀⠀⠛⠋⠤⣶⠆⠂⠍⠻⢷⣾⡏⠑⠀⢹⡷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠐⠒⡒⠖⠂⠁⠀⣀⡀⢀⣴⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣌⡙⢿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢷⣝⣒⣶⠦⠤⣤⣤⣤⡤⠤⠤⢶⣹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠑⠤⠀⠀⠈⠉⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠉⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣇⠀⠠⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⢴⣾⡇⠀⠀⠀⢛⢛⣿⡉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠿⠷⠦⠈⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠷⠤⠀⠘⡇⠀⠀⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣧⡙⢿⣿⣿⣿
September 2020

Pepe

xQc toxic twat

twitchquotes: I mean, it’s XQC. We expected anything different? Did any of ya’lll watch him as an OW pro? Let’s be honest here, was only a matter a time. and his channel won’t die, it’s filled with toxic twats just like him. he gets banned from twitch, he’ll go to FB or YT and continue to make bank.
twitch chat
November 2020
xQcOW
Text-to-Speech Playing