[Copypasta] YOU. ME. GAS STATION.

What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
January 2022
What happened to this ad? :(
More Copypastas

Little Donger and the BDC

twitchquotes: Qtpie I need help. I have a little donger so I am unable to join the BDC. Please send help and advice otherwise I will forever be a part of the small donger squad. Promote me from the SDS to the BDC please it is all I have ever wanted.
twitch chat
July 2014
imaqtpie

Self-proclaimed 138 IQ alpha male on r/Stellaris

Lol... what we have here, is called a "normie," per se. You see, the original meme, that you are referencing, mentions David, not Jason. It is quite a popular meme and the name is pretty hard to forget, so my down-vote is on you (double entendre hehe), buddy boy.
October 2021

iamverysmart

Anime girl 2

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€ โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–€โ–„ โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–€ โ–โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–โ–€โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–„โ–ˆโ–€โ–Œโ–ˆโ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–Œโ–„โ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–Œโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–Œ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–Œโ–ˆโ–Œโ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–€ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–‘
October 2016

Weebs

weedie-chan

h-hewwo...owunce of weed pwease >///< arigato... dealer-kun puts weedie-chan in bong and inhales waaah!! (โ•ฏโœงโ–ฝโœง)โ•ฏ daisuki cannabis desu~! (^ ฯ‰ ^ )uwaaa! weedie-chan i feel so kimochi!!(ใ€ƒยฐฯ‰ยฐใ€ƒ) hehe~ ur deep inside me now x3
January 2019

Weebs

UwU

Eminem Stan lyrics

twitchquotes: Dear kripp, I wrote you but still ain't callin' I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not-a got 'em There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin' Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot 'em But anyways, fuck it, what's been up? Man how's dexter? My girlfriend's pregnant too, I'm 'bout to be a father. My girlfriend's jealous 'cause I talk about you 24/7 But she don't know you like I know you kripp, no one does She don't know what it was like for people like us growin' up, you gotta call me man I'll be the biggest fan you'll ever lose Sincerely yours, Stan P.S. we should be together too
twitch chat
September 2019
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing