What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
Yassuo ditches Trick2g
twitchquotes:
Hey, Yassuo! Big fan of the stream, I can't believe you're not playing Yasuo as much anymore...RIP. I guess that's what happens when Yasuo gets gutted, lol. Anyways, I'm trying to learn to play Shaco. I just have a question about the skill build: Should I max Backstab like you backstabbed Trick, Deceive like you deceived Trick, or Hallucinate like you made Trick hallucinate about being able to play at Twitch Rivals with his friends?
twitch chat
Yassuo
League of Legends
WHAT DID GEODUDE SAY TO THE BARBER
twitchquotes:
WHAT DID GEODUDE SAY TO THE BARBER 
THANKS MOM
THANKS MOM
twitch chat
Tyler1
Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)
I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
Classic
WallStreetBets
TURN CHAT INTO WEEB MODE
twitchquotes:
TURN CHAT TO WEEB MODE
TURN CHAT TO WEEB MODE
twitch chat
Weebs
Cinco de Mayo Emoji Pasta v3
Itโs the end of May the Fourth 4๏ธโฃ ๐๐ซ but that means the beginning of ๐ธ๐จ๐พ๐ตCincHOE de Mayo ๐ธ๐จ๐พ๐ต get ready to get your TACO eaten ๐
๐ฆ๐ฎ and gulp Papi's BURRITO ๐ฉ๐ฏ๐ฆ send this to 1๏ธโฃ0๏ธโฃ of your main ๐
๐พPUTAS ๐
๐พwho need to be stuffed by a CHORIZO ๐ญ๐ฆ if you get 5๏ธโฃ back you're a border hopping ๐๐ฝCHOLA ๐๐ฝIf you get 1๏ธโฃ0๏ธโฃ back you're a ๐ Green card HOE๐ If you get 1๏ธโฃ5๏ธโฃ back you're the๐๐ฝTelenovela main BITCH ๐๐ฝ If you get 0๏ธโฃ back you're getting deported by Trump! ๐ฒ๐ฝ๐ซ๐ง๐บ๐ธ Have a happy CincHOE de Mayo and don't let la Migra get you!!