What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
I feel so bad for people who unironically like anime
twitchquotes:
I feel so bad for people who unironically like anime. Like, they didn't choose to be born with an IQ of 20 in a home with unloving parents. Imagine all the bullying they must experience at home, at school, and at the special services daycare. Let's stop bullying them, guys. They may be too retarded to understand that's what we're doing, but that doesn't mean we should pick on them. Thank you
twitch chat
Weebs
Metal isn't so great? Are you kidding me?
twitchquotes:
Metal isn't so great? Are you kidding me? metal requires more talent than any other genre of music. And moonmoon_ow hates it? Thats ridiculous, metal is the best unlike stupid normie music. Moonmoon_ow shouldn't do this stupid restriction when many people (including me btw) love the music. metal is just too complex and cerebral for the masses to consume. dont feel bad. you are just all idiots.12 btw 
twitch chat
MOONMOON
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Hello Mr Kripp, I Am Master Diamond Rank 1 In Kosovo
twitchquotes:
Hello Mr Kripp, I Am Master Diamond Rank 1 In Kosovo. My Skills Are Getting Stronker And I Wish To Join Team "TMS". My Land Has Endured Many Harsh Winters And My Cow Died Last Fall. I Am How You Say, "Hard In A Place," And Am Looking to One Day Be Best At Heartstone For My Mother Says I Have The Heart Of The Carderinos.
twitch chat
Kripp
Hearthstone
Buying Monster and adult diapers
twitchquotes:
I’m telling you, TidesOfTime is as cracked as he is jacked. I saw him at a 7-11 the other day buying Monster and adult diapers. I asked him what the diapers were for and he said ”they contain my full power so I don’t completely shit on these kids“ then he rode a boar out the door
twitch chat
TidesOfTime