[Copypasta] YOU. ME. GAS STATION.

What are we getting for dinner? Sushi of course. Uh oh, there was a roofie inside of our gas station sushi, we black out and wake up in a sewer. We're surrounded by fish; horny fish. You know what that means. Fish orgy, the stench draws in a bear. What are we gonna do? We're gonna fight it. BEAR FIGHT. BEAR HANDED. BEAR naked? oh yes, please. We befriend the bear after we beat it in a brawl. then we ride into a chuck-e-cheese, dance dance revolution. REVOLUTION? OVERTHROW THE GOVERNMENT? uh, I think so. next thing you know, i'm reincarnated as Jesus Christ. Then i turn into a jet, fly into the sun, black out again, wake up, do a bump, white out which i didn't know you could do, then i smoked a joint. Greened-out, then i turned into the sun. uh oh, looks like the meth is kicking in.
January 2022
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

My 86-year-old grandmother replied "OK, boomer" to my boomer aunt in an argument

Backstory: I live round the corner from my gran and visit her often so thanks to me she has a vague grasp of what memes are and how they work. The other day when I was round at hers and she asked what memes were popular at the moment so I told her about the "OK boomer" meme. She knew what boomers were already so she was able to get the concept of this meme fairly easily. Fast forward to today, I'm over at my gran's again, and she's on the phone to my aunt. They got into a disagreement over a slightly racist comment my aunt made the other day (my gran is very much against racism) and my gran eventually just said "OK boomer" and hung up. I've never been so proud. UPDATE: So I told my gran about this post and the reaction it got - she said she's glad that so many of you enjoyed her little joke and that it proves she's still young at heart. I agree with that 100%.
December 2021

Cinco de Mayo Emoji Pasta

HOLA👋🏻 all you dirty little TACO🌮SLUTS😘🤣do you know what day it is?!🤔 I smell immigrants🙎🏾‍♂️🙋🏽‍♂️ and CULTURAL APPROPRIATION🙅🏼 so it must be SINKO DE FUCKING MAYONNAISE😩💦🍻🌮❤️🌯 Hide your KIDS👨‍👩‍👧‍👦, hide your BURRITOS🌯, and get your CUMMIES READY😩cause DADDY TRUMP🇧🇪is coming to deport us all🤷🏽‍♂️🙆🏾 But DONT FORGET to drink TACOS 🌮 and eat TEQUILA 🍸because the only way for you FILTHY CUMSLUTS to stay in America🇺🇸is to PARTYYY🎈🎉🎁😍💦😩 So send this to CINCO(5 you dumb bitch) of the SLUTTIEST😏 jars of MAYO you know and if you DONT ❌get any back you get NO 🚫🚫CULTURAL CUMMIES 😭🤷🏽‍♂️🌮💦😩
May 2022

Cinco de Mayo

Emoji Pasta

Holiday Emoji

Holiday

Think of the saltwater fish

twitchquotes: ( ° ͜ʖ͡°) Hey Kripp, Marine Biologist Gilbin Pastarino here. I come to you on behald of all the salt water creatures of the world as your body seems to have absorbed 99% of the oceans salt. Please thinkerino of the poor fisheroni. Thanks
twitch chat
December 2014
Reynad

peepoSad

⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠟⠛⠻⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⢀⣠⡤⠤⢭⣛⡉⢀⡤⠴⠶⠶⡶⢆⣉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠀⠠⠞⠉⢀⣀⡤⣤⣤⣭⠭⣤⡤⣽⣿⢿⠿⠛⠛⠳⣌⢻⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⣶⠿⠛⠉⣡⠤⠭⠭⠷⡔⠚⠛⠉⠉⠉⢛⢛⢏⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⠃⠘⠇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⣿⠉⠁⢒⣒⣶⠶⡦⠒⠒⠒⠚⠓⠛⠉⡿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣟⠀⢉⣉⣠⣤⣤⢶⣒⣠⣭⣭⣭⣭⣉⡗⣼⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡟⠀⠛⠿⠭⠶⠖⠛⠉⠀⠈⠁⠈⠉⠛⢣⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⡏⣶⣦⣄⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⣤⣶⣿⣿⣜⠿⣿⣿ ⣿⢣⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡝⣿
September 2020

Peepo

Pepe

This means absolutely nothing

twitchquotes: ✞ĦЇϟ ℳ€∀Иϟ Å฿ϟϴℒÜ✝ℰℒ¥ ℵϴ✞ℋℑИḠ, Ї ⒿṲϟ† ШѦИ✝ ℙ€ѺṔℒ€ †☮ ℭѺℙẎṔÅϟ†ℰℝℐℵϴ ѦℵÐ ϟṔÅ♏ ✞ĦЇϟ ℭ♓∀† ℱÜℒℒ Ѻ℉ ℱѦḠ$
twitch chat
July 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing