[Copypasta] Hey mods, slow mode doesn't affect me

twitchquotes: Hey mods, did you really think that slow mode will affect on me. I will let you know that I have multiple accounts in this chat right now. If you don't believe me, I will copy and paste this on my other accounts right now.
twitch chat
September 2018

MODS

Classic

Waiting for adblock to be disabled
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Ban one 12 year old, get the whole 9gag

twitchquotes: :tf: BAN :tf: ONE :tf: 12 :tf: YEAR :tf: OLD :tf: AND :tf: YOU :tf: GET :tf: THE :tf: WHOLE :tf: 9GAG :tf:
twitch chat
February 2017

MODS

Classic

Ban X Get The Whole Y

Whoโ€™s Joe? Joe Momma

"Whoโ€™s joe?" a distant voice asks. Instantly everyone nearby hears the sound of 1,000s of bricks rapidly shuffling towards his location. The earth itself seemed to cry out in agony, until finally the ground itself split open and a horrific creature crawled from the ground, covered in mucus and tar. โ€Joe Mommaโ€ฆโ€ the creature whispered. The man cried out in pain as he disintegrated into dust, and the whole world fell silent in fear. "I did a little trolling." the wretched creature remarked before burrowing back into the earth.
September 2021

Classic

Mic Muted

โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–„โ–‘โ–„โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–„โ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘โ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–ˆโ–‘โ–‘ โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–€โ–€โ–‘โ–‘โ–‘
ascii art
March 2015

Classic

Oh my gourd, I am financially ruined (agricultural futures)

I have lost everything, and I'm not sure how to continue. This summer I invested $17,500 (six months salary and my entire life savings) into ornamental gourd futures, hoping to capitalize on this lucrative emerging industry. After watching a video about Vincent Kosuga and his monopoly on onions, I decided I'd try to do something similar with another vegetable. I did some research and found out many agricultural forecasters expected this year's gourd yield would be far smaller than the past, due to deteriorating soil conditions in central Mexico and a warmer-than-average spring. At first, demand soared around Halloween and prices skyrocketed, but the gourd bubble burst on November 12th. Unfortunately, the coronavirus caused a massive drop-off in demand due to fewer families decorating their tables for thanksgiving, and prices plummeted. I had invested early enough that I thought I would still be fine, but then on the morning of December 2nd, a new email in my inbox caused my stomach to turn into a pretzel. The massive gourd shipment from Argentina, scheduled for early March, had arrived. I was planning on selling off my futures right before this, in February, but this ruined everything. To top it off, the gourds in this shipment were absolutely gargantuan, some topping 4 pounds each, causing the price-per-pound to drop like an anchor into the range of 6 cents per pound. I am ruined.
January 2021

Classic

WallStreetBets

Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes

twitchquotes: Kripp puts his hands on my hips and looks into my eyes. His face comes closer as he plants his wet lips onto mine. We are locked together in a beautiful display of love. Then I wake up. I look at Kripp's stream. He is playing Tavern Brawl. Now I remember why I fell asl... ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
November 2016
Kripp

Classic

Hearthstone

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