[Copypasta] not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

Tweet: https://twitter.com/breathinbuckyy/status/1091762452524662789
I used to be a real ad
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Pickpocket hot tip

twitchquotes: Hot tip: When someone yells pickpocket start searching for your wallet in the groin area and exclaim 'Thank God my wallet is safely tucked between my testicles'. The pickpocket will see this and assume that the wallet is there. These people usually have very supple and delicate hands so when they try to take your wallet you will instead get a pleasant fondling to your genital area.
twitch chat
January 2019

Classic

Auto-Pay feature

twitchquotes: Hello Octavian Kripparrian, Marvel Future Fight devs here. We have noticed you have used our "Auto-Play" functionality extensively today, with much better results than when you played the game yourself. Because of this success, we are happy to announce another brand-new feature: "Auto-Pay". We have seen you spend a large amount of time inefficiently upgrading your character, and this time is better spent Auto-Playing. Please click the "Auto-Pay" button, and let your Credit Card do the work!
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

sellout

Classic

Based? Based on what?

Based? Based on what? In your dick? Please shut the fuck up and use words properly you fuckin troglodyte, do you think God gave us a freedom of speech just to spew random words that have no meaning that doesn't even correllate to the topic of the conversation? Like please you always complain about why no one talks to you or no one expresses their opinions on you because you're always spewing random shit like poggers based cringe and when you try to explain what it is and you just say that it's funny like what? What the fuck is funny about that do you think you'll just become a stand-up comedian that will get a standing ovation just because you said "cum" in the stage? HELL NO YOU FUCKIN IDIOT, so please shut the fuck up and use words properly
December 2020

Classic

Based

Handsome Squidward

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ascii art
February 2021

Classic

Moon emoji blob

🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌕🎩🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑🌒🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌓🌕 🌕🌕🌖🌑👁🌑👁🌓🌕 🌕🌕🌗🌑🌑👄🌑🌔🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌒🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🎀🌓🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌑🌑🌑🌔🌕🌕 🌕🌕🌘🌔🍆🌑🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌖🌒🌕🌗🌒🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌗🌓🌕🌗🌓🌕🌕🌕 🌕🌘🌔🌕🌗🌓🌕🌕🌕 🌕👠🌕🌕🌕👠🌕🌕🌕
ascii art
February 2021

Classic

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