[Copypasta] not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Dear Mr. Morosan, this is Sister Agatha

twitchquotes: Dear Mr. Morosan, this is Sister Agatha from the preschool down the road. Did you and Rania have a child recently? I ask because of all the crying and whining I've heard coming from your house. The only explanation is that there is an immature person in there, and surely that wouldn't be you, a fine emotionally-stable adult! Please come by and I'll give the child a free lesson in manners! Cheers, Agatha.
twitch chat
April 2018
Kripp

Classic

neverlucky

Please refrain from likening us to plebeians

twitchquotes: Twitch streamers and their subscribers define us (not subscribed audience) as members of a lower social class, plebs as they call it. I find it inappropriate to compare us with ancient Rome's lowest class as there is nothing ignominious to being a member of the proletariat. Also their living standards were significantly inferior to ours (e.g. health, education) so the comparison is unsound. In the future, please refrain from likening us to plebeians because descriminating due to economic and social status like that is reprehensible in our modern society.
twitch chat
November 2018

Classic

plebs vs subs

Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here

twitchquotes: Hi Kripp, sleazy video game developer here. I understand you are willing to sell yourself out like a cheap Romanian hooker to any two-bit game development outfit as long as they dangle some shekels in front of your beady little eyes? Great! Because I have this brilliant game in beta testing right now called "Watching Paint Dry" and I am willing to pay you $5.00 USD to play it for 24 hours straight. Let me know what you think, you glorious sellout!
twitch chat
June 2016
Kripp

sellout

Classic

Malta vs Penguins

This does not change the fact that in Antarctica there are 21 million penguins and in Malta there are 502,653 inhabitants. So if the penguins decide to invade Malta, each Maltese will have to fight 42 penguins.
May 2021

Classic

EU COMING THROUGH v2

twitchquotes: EU COMING THROUGH LUL TRY AND EXTERMINATE A GROUP OF PEOPLE LUL NEEDS AMERICA TO SAVE THEM LUL STILL HAS A ROYAL FAMILY LUL SOCIALISTS LUL NO FREE SPEECH LUL MARRY 16 YEAR OLDS LUL STABBINGS IN EU LUL
twitch chat
March 2019

Classic

EU vs NA

Text-to-Speech Playing