[Copypasta] not an asexual thing

twitchquotes: ‘not an asexual thing’. try living a day in my shoes, walking around terrified of encountering sex everywhere i go. wherever i look, parents with children, people sucking each others’ faces. it makes me and millions of other aces out there feel really attacked.
twitch chat
February 2019

Classic

I used to be a real ad
More Classic Copypastas

Priced in

Don't even ask the question. The answer is yes, it's priced in. Think Amazon will beat the next earnings? That's already been priced in. You work at the drive thru for Mickey D's and found out that the burgers are made of human meat? Priced in. You think insiders don't already know that? The market is an all powerful, all encompassing being that knows the very inner workings of your subconscious before you were even born. Your very existence was priced in decades ago when the market was valuing Standard Oil's expected future earnings based on population growth that would lead to your birth, what age you would get a car, how many times you would drive your car every week, how many times you take the bus/train, etc. Anything you can think of has already been priced in, even the things you aren't thinking of. You have no original thoughts. Your consciousness is just an illusion, a product of the omniscent market. Free will is a myth. The market sees all, knows all and will be there from the beginning of time until the end of the universe (the market has already priced in the heat death of the universe). So please, before you make a post on wsb asking whether AAPL has priced in earpods 11 sales or whatever, know that it has already been priced in and don't ask such a dumb fucking question again.
December 2020

Classic

WallStreetBets

40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14

twitchquotes: This chat disgusts me. 40% of the chat are 41 year olds pretending to be 14. The other 40% are 14 year olds pretending to be 41. And the remaining 30% just copy pastes the longest message they can find in the chat. Grow up chat, grow up. FailFish
twitch chat
January 2019

Classic

I hate Twitch Chat

Vegan Propaganda

twitchquotes: KKona Howdy Kripp, my name is Bill and I work in the meat industry. I'm getting pretty sick and tired of all the vegan propaganda you're spreading on this here livestream. You rave about the health benefits of becoming a leaf-muncher, but look at you! You're a pale, scrawny, hallowed-out husk of a man. Hell, you probably can't even lift up a hamburger with those pitiful arms of yours. If you don't stop hating on meat, I'm gonna come by in my truck and force-feed you my "giant sausage!"
twitch chat
July 2016
Kripp

Classic

Japan heart surgeon and yakuza boss

In Japan 🇯🇵 , heart surgeon ❤️👨‍⚕️ . Number one 😭☝️ . Steady hand😳✋️. One day, Yakuza boss 🙇🏻need 🆕 heart💘. I do operation🔪⚔️. But, mistake😱! Yakuza boss die😵😪! Yakuza very mad👿. I hide🙈 in fishing boat🐟🚣🏻‍♀️, come to America🎇🎊🇺🇸. No english🤐, no food😩, no money📉🚫💲. Darryl 👨🏿give me job🙌👨🏻‍💼. Now I have house🏡, American car 🚗 , and new woman 🆕👱🏻‍♀️. Darryl 👨🏿save life⛑. My big secret🙊: I kill ☠️yakuza boss on purpose😈. I good 👍surgeon. The best👌💯!
July 2019

Emoji Pasta

Classic

Gachi pose

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣤⣴⣶⣾⣆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣤⣤⣤⠄⢤⣴⣶⣿⣿⣿⢟⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣤⡾⢏⢠⣶⣶⣾⡑⡀⢸⠋⠁⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⢀⣠⣶⣿⣿⣿⠟⠁⠁⠰⣋⢫⢲⡇⠛⠄⠄⢀⣠⣤⣉⠻⠿⠿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢰⣿⣿⣟⣋⣉⣁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⣆⣂⡕⠼⠂⠉⣿⣿⡇⢏⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠙⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⢸⢋⡁⢊⠒⣲⡶⠊⢁⣴⣿⣿⣿⣦⣦⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠙⠻⣿⡟⠄⡆⢸⣧⣾⣶⣤⣤⣾⡿⣿⣿⠿⡻⣻⣿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠠⣾⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⣥⣾⣿⠿⣛⠅⢰⣗⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣶⣶⣿⣟⣛⣛⣛⠲⠿⣵⣿⣟⢅⠂⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢹⡟⠋⣠⣤⣤⣤⣍⡑⠂⠬⢉⣾⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⠁⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠷⢶⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⠄⢉⣁⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⠈⠙⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡍⠟⢁⣠⣤⣶⣶⣤⣄⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣷⣦⣀⠉⠿⣿⡇⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⡀⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡄⠹⠇⢰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠋⠄⠄⠈⠙⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇
November 2018
Forsen

Classic

KappaPride

Text-to-Speech Playing