About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
I am... the Kripp
twitchquotes:
My name is Octavian Morosan, and I am the saltiest man alive. To the outside world, I'm an ordinary vegan, but secretly, with the help of my friends at P.E.T.A. Labs, I play childrens card games and find other babies like me. I BM'd the man who killed my mother, but in doing so, I opened up our world to new threats. And I am the only one salty enough to complain about going second. them. I am... The Kripp!
twitch chat
Kripp
Stop posting useless stuff in chat
twitchquotes:
Cᴀɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴀʟʟ ᴊᴜsᴛ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇsᴇ ᴜɴɴᴇᴄᴇssᴀʀɪʟʏ ʟᴏɴɢ ᴘᴏsᴛs ᴘʟᴇᴀsᴇ? Tʜᴇ ᴏɴʟʏ ʀᴇᴀsᴏɴ ʏᴏᴜ ᴘᴏsᴛ ᴛʜᴇᴍ ɪs ᴛᴏ ᴛʀʏ ᴀɴᴅ ʙᴀɪᴛ sᴏᴍᴇᴏɴᴇ ɪɴᴛᴏ ᴄᴏᴘʏ ᴀɴᴅ ᴘᴀsᴛɪɴɢ ᴛʜᴇᴍ. Wʜᴀᴛ ɪғ ᴡᴇ ᴀʟʟ ᴊᴜsᴛ ɢᴀᴠᴇ ɪɴᴛᴇʀᴇsᴛɪɴɢ ᴠɪᴇᴡs ᴀɴᴅ ᴏᴘɪɴɪᴏɴs ᴀʙᴏᴜᴛ ᴛʜᴇ sᴛʀᴇᴀᴍ ɪɴsᴛᴇᴀᴅ ᴏғ ᴘᴏsᴛɪɴɢ ᴜsᴇʟᴇss sᴛᴜғғ? Pʟᴇᴀsᴇ I ʙᴇɢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴛᴡɪᴛᴄʜ ᴄʜᴀᴛ, ᴛᴏ sᴛᴏᴘ ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴛʜɪs ɴᴏɴsᴇɴsᴇ.
twitch chat
Kripp
Joker fursona bodyguard
twitchquotes:
Okay CLEARLY sakurai is playing favorites already wtf. Joker is literally bayo, cloud, olimar put together. He gave him a GUN for gods sake and you LMFAO you can’t even hurt his fursona bodyguard ohmygod
twitch chat
Super Smash Bros
Maya's mod responds to Miz and Maya break up
I wish I could say I didn't see this coming but...sigh..I definitely did. To many people not in the loop it may have come as a shock. They certainly LOOKED like a happy couple, but when you've been a twitch mod for as long as I have...you notice certain things. As Maya's head mod and commandant in charge of holding off weirdos I could tell very clearly that something was up.
The way she acted on stream, her general atmosphere, twas as if a beautiful chrysanthemum was being oppressed by a violent and balding Gardner. Someone who had not the faintest idea how to look after beautiful flowers.
But the time has come, the thorns and nature hath come to wreak havok. At the moment a plan is being drafted by me and the sub mods to find her a new boyfriend who is fit to properly look after her. Naturally I will be taking the temporary (and maybe permanent if all goes to plan 😉) role of boyfriend/guardian.
But while I reveal my plans and provide you all a mere glimpse at the machinations set in motion by this breakup I must warn you...
BACK OFF...
This is not your fight, you have no idea who you are dealing with. If you come after her now without going through the necessary protocols then I won't be able to control myself. There is a reason I would never show myself on stream or play among us. There is a side to the top twitch dog that you don't wanna know about. These fangs are here for a reason, don't. Make me. Use them.
Maya
Simps
Keep spamming, while I succeed in life
twitchquotes:
Since my IQ is quite above the average, I will not be joining this spamming festival. I know you would not understand it, just like you dont understand why I have a good job, and big library. Keep spamming, while I succeed in life
twitch chat