About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
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The LGBTQ future
twitchquotes:
The year is 2040. The LGBTQ party has taken over the whole world. Being heterosexual is illegal. At age 14, everyone is forced by law to change to another one of the 666 different genders. The last gamers hide in the sewers, eating rats and enjoying decade-old videogames; the last ones without identity politics woven directly in the code. Their last hope: leaving edgy comments in reviews on Steam.
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AYAYA 3
⣿⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⡇⡇⣿⣿⡇⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⢸⣿
⡟⢸⣿⣿⣭⣭⡭⣼⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⢸⣧⣇⠇⢸⣿⣿⠈⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⠘⣿
⡇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣻⡿⣿⣿⡟⣿⢸⣿⣿⠇⡆⣝⠿⡌⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿
⢣⢾⣾⣷⣾⣽⣻⣿⣇⣿⣿⣧⣿⢸⣿⣿⡆⢸⣹⣿⣆⢥⢛⡿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿
⣛⡓⣉⠉⠙⠻⢿⣿⣿⣟⣻⠿⣹⡏⣿⣿⣧⢸⣧⣿⣿⣨⡟⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠄⣿
⠸⣷⣹⣿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⢿⣿⣿⣯⣳⣿⣭⣽⢼⣿⣜⣿⣇⣷⡹⣿⣿⣿⠁⢰⣿
⠄⢻⣷⣿⡄⢈⠿⠇⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⠛⠲⢯⣿⣒⡾⣼⣷⡹⣿⣿⠄⣼⣿
⡄⢸⣿⣿⣷⣬⣽⣯⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⢀⠉⠙⠛⠛⠳⠽⠿⢠⣿⣿
⡇⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢄⣹⡿⠃⠄⠄⣰⠎⡈⣾⣿⣿
⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣭⣽⣖⣄⣴⣯⣾⢷⣿⣿⣿
⣧⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠯⠊⠙⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣏⣾⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣦⠹⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠄⢀⣴⢾⣼⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣇⢽⣿⣿⣿⡏⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣿⣛⣻⠿⣟⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⢃
⣿⣿⣿⡎⣷⣽⠻⣇⣿⣿⣿⡿⣟⣵⣿⣟⣽⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⢯⣾⣿⣿⣿⠟⠱⡟
⣿⣿⣿⣿⢹⣿⣿⢮⣚⡛⠒⠛⢛⣋⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣱⠿⣿⣿⠟⣡⣺⢿
Weebs
You see this fictional character?
twitchquotes:
You see this fictional character? I'm not afraid to admit that I've lost liters of cum to this character of mere fantasy. Isn't it funny how not even real women arouse me like she does? I have killed millions of my offspring to the thought of having an intercourse with a cartoon
twitch chat
Weebs
Al Pacino's dongarino sweat is tastarino
twitchquotes:
Hey Kripp! It's me, 
(from the pizzarino place). I'm back from my 600 second ban. I still have your faggarino pizzarino if you want it. Al Pacino's dongarino sweat dried up but it is still tastarino. Give me a call my number is 867-5309. Pls no copy pasterino dongerino frappuccino mochaccino pistachio. Your friend- (from the pizzarino place).
(from the pizzarino place). I'm back from my 600 second ban. I still have your faggarino pizzarino if you want it. Al Pacino's dongarino sweat dried up but it is still tastarino. Give me a call my number is 867-5309. Pls no copy pasterino dongerino frappuccino mochaccino pistachio. Your friend- (from the pizzarino place).
twitch chat
Kripp
Just a clock
twitchquotes:
JUST A CLOCK BRO
JUST A CLOCK BRO
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ESL TV LoL