About 5 years ago I was making a character on an RPG and my ex girlfriend was sitting next to me talking to me and asking me questions about my game. I had a dwarf and dreamed up the name Murk Durgle. My ex hated that name and said it felt gross, like the word moist.
I shrugged it off. We went about our day and after putting the kids to bed we started having sex. She tells me she's about to come and I bellow out "MUUUURRRKKKK DUUUURGLE" and she punches me in the chest and yelled at me "what the fuck dude?! You fucking murk durgled me?! Give me my vibrator and get the fuck out"
Then I sat out in the kitchen laughing for a few minutes
I used to be a real ad
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Iβm a Zoe HATER
twitchquotes:
Iβm hoping Zoe DIES xD Iβm a Zoe HATER because sheβs so cute and EVIL! People get so trolled by her bubble and her voice lines are SATANIC, like the one about cake! Sheβs super DEGENERATE but also smarter than she looks, just like SATAN as a kid XD
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Penis Inspection Day
twitchquotes:
I was talking to some people I know, and apparently I'm the only person who remembers "Penis Inspection Day" in Elementary School. The gym teacher took us into the washroom one at a time while everyone else kept playing, and tugged our foreskin back and inspected our penis to make sure we were developing properly and keeping clean. Surely I can't be the only one who remembers this, other people must have had Penis Inspection Day at their school too.
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Kreygasm
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ββββββββ ββββββ ββββββββ
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I met a man named madlife
twitchquotes:
Back when I was in korea, I met a man named madlife, and he came up to me and said "this is how you play thresh you young wippersnapper" and I stood up out of my chair and said "okay" and that, is how the american madlife, machinegunnerusmc was made.
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machinegunnerusmc
SAP FACE
twitchquotes:
SAP FACE
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Reynad