[Copypasta] To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesusโ€™s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in Godโ€™s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. ๐Ÿ˜‚ And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
(โ–€ฬฟฤนฬฏโ”œโ”ฌโ”ดโ”ฌโ”ด Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

What is inside that taco? Oh no it's KRIPP

twitchquotes: TBTacoLeft TBCheesePull TBTacoRight WHAT IS INSIDE THAT TACO TBTacoLeft BabyRage TBTacoRight OH NO IT'S KRIPP
twitch chat
April 2016
Kripp

nl_Kripp can you stop it with all the salt?

twitchquotes: nl_Kripp can you stop it with all the salt? I was trapped in a salt mine for 3 days straight without any water or food. I only survived by drinking my own urine and eating my toes. Every time I see you spitting salt everywhere it gives me terrible PTSD flashbacks. Thanks.
twitch chat
August 2015
Kripp

salty

Minion Joker

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–€โ–€โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–€โ–€โ–„ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ–ˆโ–„โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–„โ–ˆโ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–€โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ•โ–โ–“โ–“โ–Œ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–Œ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–โ–“โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–“โ–Œโ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–Œโ•โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ•โ–โ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆโ•โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ•โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆโ•โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–Œโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ•โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆโ•โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ•โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆโ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆ โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆโ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–ˆโ•โ•โ–ˆโ–„ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–€โ–ˆโ–€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œโ”€โ”€โ–โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–“โ–Œ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–€โ–€โ–€
September 2021

Hey Chat Who Cares?

โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โฃ โฃคโฃดโฃถโฃถโฃถโฃถโฃถโ ถโฃถโฃคโฃคโฃ€โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โ €โข€โฃคโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ โ €โข€โ ˆโขฟโข€โฃ€โ €โ นโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฆโฃ„โ €โ €โ € HEYโ €โ €โ €โฃดโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโ ฟโ €โ €โฃŸโก‡โข˜โฃพโฃฝโ €โ €โกโ ‰โ ™โข›โฃฟโฃทโก–โ € CHATโ €โ €โฃพโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ ฟโ ทโ ถโ คโ ™โ ’โ €โ ’โขปโฃฟโฃฟโกทโ ‹โ €โ ดโ žโ ‹โ โข™โฃฟโฃ„ WHOโ €โ €โขธโฃฟโฃฟโฃฏโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโก„โ €โ €โ €โ €โ ‰โขนโก„โ €โ €โ €โ ›โ ›โ ‹โ ‰โ นโก‡ CARESโขธโฃฟโฃฟโ €โ €โ €โฃ€โฃ โฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃผโฃ‡โฃ€โฃ€โฃ€โฃ›โฃ›โฃ’โฃฒโขพโกท โข€โ คโ ’โ ’โขผโฃฟโฃฟโ ถโ žโขปโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโกฟโ โ €โฃผโ ƒ โขฎโ €โ €โ €โ €โฃฟโฃฟโฃ†โ €โ €โ ปโฃฟโกฟโ ›โ ‰โ ‰โ โ €โ ‰โ ‰โ ›โ ฟโฃฟโฃฟโ Ÿโ โ €โฃผโ ƒโ € โ ˆโ “โ ถโฃถโฃพโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃงโก€โ €โ ˆโ ’โขคโฃ€โฃ€โก€โ €โ €โฃ€โฃ€โก โ šโ โ €โข€โกผโ ƒโ €โ € โ €โ €โ €โ ˆโขฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃฟโฃทโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃญโฃญโฃญโฃญโฃญโฃฅโฃคโฃคโฃคโฃดโฃŸโ 
September 2020

Huntard is confused

twitchquotes: ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ•๏ฝŽ๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ†๏ฝ•๏ฝ“๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ผŽ ๏ฝ•๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ”๏ฝ๏ฝ‹๏ฝ…๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ฝ™๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ”๏ฝ•๏ฝ’๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ผŒ ๏ฝ‚๏ฝ•๏ฝ” ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ฝŽ๏ฝ” ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ–๏ฝ…๏ฝ“๏ผŽ ๏ผฅ๏ฝ–๏ฝ…๏ฝŽ ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ…๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ”๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝ–๏ฝ…๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ๏ฝ–๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝ๏ฝ—๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ„๏ฝ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ… ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝ’๏ฝ„ ๏ฝ„๏ฝ‰๏ฝ„ ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ๏ฝ” ๏ฝ—๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝŽ๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ผŽ ๏ผก ๏ฝ“๏ฝ‰๏ฝŽ๏ฝ‡๏ฝŒ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ๏ฝ’ ๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ„๏ฝ๏ฝ—๏ฝŽ ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ‰๏ฝ“ ๏ฝ†๏ฝ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ๏ฝ“ ๏ฝˆ๏ฝ… ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ๏ฝŽ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ…๏ฝ„๏ฝ…๏ฝ“๏ผŽ ๏ฝ”๏ฝ‰๏ฝ๏ฝ… ๏ฝ”๏ฝ ๏ฝƒ๏ฝ’๏ฝ๏ฝ†๏ฝ” ๏ฝ‡๏ฝ๏ฝˆ๏ฝš๏ฝ‰๏ฝŒ๏ฝŒ๏ฝ๏ผŽ
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing