[Copypasta] To be fair, you need a very high IQ to understand The Bible

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand The Bible. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Jesus’s nihilistic outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation- his personal philosophy draws heavily from Narodnaya Volya literature, for instance. The fans understand this stuff; they have the intellectual capacity to truly appreciate the depths of these jokes, to realise that they're not just funny- they say something deep about LIFE. As a consequence people who dislike The Bible truly ARE idiots- of course they wouldn't appreciate, for instance, the humour in God’s existential catchphrase "Never trust anyone completely but God." which itself is a cryptic reference to Turgenev's Russian epic Fathers and Sons. I'm smirking right now just imagining one of those addlepated simpletons scratching their heads in confusion as King James's genius wit unfolds itself on the pages. What fools.. how I pity them. πŸ˜‚ And yes by the way, I DO have a Bible tattoo. And no, you cannot see it. It's for the ladies' eyes only- And even they have to demonstrate that they're within 5 IQ points of my own (preferably lower) beforehand.
August 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

Chuck's Feeduck and Seeduck

The sign is a subtle joke. The shop is called "Sneed's Feed & Seed", where "feed" and "seed" both end in the sound "-eed", thus rhyming with the name of the owner, Sneed. The sign says that the shop was "Formerly Chuck's", implying that the two words beginning with "F" and "S" would have ended with "-uck", rhyming with "Chuck". So, when Chuck owned the shop, it would have been called "Chuck's Feeduck and Seeduck".
June 2021

Anime girl 2

β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€ β–‘β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–ˆβ–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–€β–„ β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–€ β–β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–β–€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–„β–ˆβ–€β–Œβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–€β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–Œβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–ˆβ–€β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–Œ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–ˆβ–Œβ–ˆβ–„β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–‘β–€ β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–„β–‘β–„β–„β–€β–€β–’β–ˆβ–€β–ˆβ–‘
October 2016

Weebs

My girlfriend’s dad is a banking exec (post on /r/cryptocurrency)

My girlfriend’s dad is a banking exec, I told him I’m all in on crypto He and I met yesterday. He is a kind and mild mannered guy who comes off as deeply intelligent. I asked him how he felt about decentralized finance and he said it was a risky venture (no surprise from his banking point of view) and anyone putting money into it is a fool. He seemed disappointed that his daughter’s boyfriend wanted to talk about crypto. For me, crypto has fundamentally changed my life - it has taught me about finance, geopolitics, and that I have the agency to live a life I wasn’t sure was possible. So, when he seemed disappointed, what did I do? I doubled down. I gave an impassioned speech about why cryptocurrency is changing the world and democratizing resources that traditionally only the wealthy had access to. It is giving poor communities a fighting chance and that it is revolutionary and something that is a big part of my investment strategy. I don’t know what the point of this post is, but I just, idk, he made me feel like a fool of an investor because he either just doesn’t get it or is scared of it and I feel like his view of me has become less favorable in terms of dating his daughter, but I’m going to stand up for what I believe in. Ramble over.
September 2021

Cryptocurrency

Coated like a plasterer's radio

twitchquotes: After having my birth cannon pounded, he then proceeded to raid my poo pipe. My stench trench was trembling like a rat on acid. The seemingly never-ending streams of gentleman's relish emanating from his thrill drill soon had me coated like a plasterer's radio
twitch chat
November 2014
Forsen

Dog food lid

twitchquotes: Hello everyone! I'm entering streams to say something random! Did you know "dog food lid" backwards is "dildo of god"? Good bye everyone!
twitch chat
October 2014
imaqtpie
Text-to-Speech Playing