[Copypasta] Xi Jinping isn't so great?

twitchquotes: Xi Jinping isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a dictator with so much power over a country? Xi Jinping brings the world economy to another level, and we will be blessed if we see another dictator with his skill and passion for human rights again. Mao Zedong breaks records, Stalin breaks records, Xi Jinping breaks the rules. You can keep your free speech, I prefer my social credit score
twitch chat
November 2019
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

MrDestructoid ERROR public static void

twitchquotes: MrDestructoid Anyone who thinks mobile games can't be amazing has never played Art of Conquest! My friends are all having a blast already, and I'll be joining them right away! I'll also be subscribing to Kripp's channel to stay up to date! MrDestructoid ERROR public static void WaitTime(NULL)
twitch chat
June 2017
Kripp

Viewbots

I used to work at an abortion clinic

I used to work at an abortion clinic and I saw some extremely fucked up shit there which is why I'm so anti-abortion now. This is just SOME of the horrible stuff I personally witnessed: β€’ ⁠A 23 year old woman came in 11 months into her pregnancy and said "I don't want my stupid baby anymore, kill it" and the doctor said "okay" and he put jumper cables up her baby hole and connected them to a car battery and let it run for six days straight β€’ ⁠A little 8-year old girl wandered in and said "I want an abortion but I am not pregnant" and the doctor said "we'll fix that" and he stole a baby and cut the girl open and put the baby inside her and sewed her shut and then woke the girl up and said "congratulations it's a healthy six year old boy" and the girl said "can I keep him" and the doctor said no and then backed over her in the parking lot with his brand new Ford Raptor β€’ ⁠They made me sign an agreement promising to stop drinking from the medical waste container (I signed somebody else's name) β€’ ⁠One of the doctors there developed a futuristic ray gun that could make anything he shot have an abortion, even trees, cars, or barns β€’ ⁠The receptionist threw nail polish at an elderly man β€’ ⁠The doctor's assistant invented this thing she called "the silly slide" and it was a really fun little water slide that connected a woman's vagina to a paper shredder so a newborn baby could briefly "enjoy the high life" β€’ ⁠The oldest child we aborted was in his late 70s, we didn't even know he was a baby until his wife brought in photos β€’ ⁠The doctors put all sorts of crap up a woman's uterus including a clown nose, bicycle handlebars, a calendar, and an entire Sears retail outlet (before bankruptcy) β€’ ⁠During every successful abortion, the doctor would shout "take that, baby" and he'd push a red button that made sirens go off and confetti fell from the ceiling and we'd all get Del Taco for free
August 2021

NSFW

I use Linux as my operating system

"I use Linux as my operating system," I state proudly to the unkempt, bearded man. He swivels around in his desk chair with a devilish gleam in his eyes, ready to mansplain with extreme precision. "Actually", he says with a grin, "Linux is just the kernel. You use GNU+Linux!' I don't miss a beat and reply with a smirk, "I use Alpine, a distro that doesn't include the GNU Coreutils, or any other GNU code. It's Linux, but it's not GNU+Linux." The smile quickly drops from the man's face. His body begins convulsing and he foams at the mouth and drops to the floor with a sickly thud. As he writhes around he screams "I-IT WAS COMPILED WITH GCC! THAT MEANS IT'S STILL GNU!" Coolly, I reply "If windows were compiled with GCC, would that make it GNU?" I interrupt his response with "-and work is being made on the kernel to make it more compiler-agnostic. Even if you were correct, you won't be for long." With a sickly wheeze, the last of the man's life is ejected from his body. He lies on the floor, cold and limp. I've womansplained him to death.
June 2021

I had dreams and ambitions of becoming a pro 1v1 player

twitchquotes: Hello OddOne, my name is Gustavian. I had dreams and ambitions, of becoming a professional 1v1 player. I picked this game up yesterday, with hopes and dreams. But you picked a fucking stupid op noob champ, and i lost my 2 bucks because of you. Now i have to stay at my aunts house in Nigeria, because i cant take the train home to Uganda.
twitch chat
September 2014
TheOddOne

Billy the Puppet (from Saw)

β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β–„β–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–„β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–€β”€β–„β”€β–€β–ˆβ–“β–“β–“β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–„β”€β–€β–€β–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–€β–€β–€β–„β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β–€β–„β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–„β–€β–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ”€β–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β–€β–€β–€β–€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β–€β–ˆβ–€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–€β–€β–€β–€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€β”€β”€ β”€β–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β”€ β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆ β–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–Œβ–’β–’β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–’β–’β–β–β–β– β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β–’β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–’β–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–’β–’β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β–’β–’β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ ───────▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒─────── β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€ β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β–ˆβ–ˆβ”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€β”€
September 2021
Text-to-Speech Playing