[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

A card game that requires an intense amount of skill

twitchquotes: Nice job kripp! You won at a card game that requires an intense amount of skill. I pray that my sons will be like you and win card games with the amount of skill that you win with! If not I'll sacrifice them to RNGesus and pray that they are decent and competent enough to be as incredible as you!
twitch chat
February 2015
Kripp

Hearthstone

DAILY QUEST SPAM THIS 50 TIMES

twitchquotes: ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬DAILY▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ KEKW SPAM THIS 50 TIMES KEKW ▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬QUEST▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬▬
twitch chat
November 2020

ResidentSleeper I'm so fucking strong right now

twitchquotes: ResidentSleeper I'm so fucking strong right now ResidentSleeper I really want to fight this ResidentSleeper Wait that actually killed me? ResidentSleeper Holy shit I played that so bad ResidentSleeper
twitch chat
April 2018
imaqtpie

i think they should make golden cards have a small bonus

twitchquotes: i think they should make golden cards have a small bonus or something so it's worth getting. I think +1 attack or -1 less mana to cast or something
twitch chat
April 2017

Hearthstone

Terminating your casual account

twitchquotes: Hello Kripp this is BLIZZARD, remember how we gave you every card...golden! Just to get you to legend. And you're stuck at 9? Its the end of the season Kripp... were gonna have to terminate your casual account.
twitch chat
December 2014
Kripp
Text-to-Speech Playing