[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
(▀̿Ĺ̯├┬┴┬┴ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
More Copypastas

Spooky story

twitchquotes: One day there was Man. He wake up in night time like 3 or 4 am in the morning, Much sweat from nightmare of skeletons!! He turns on his computer and waited for the screen to load. "I will watch Kripparrian to calm my fears" he Mumbled. As he click the URL the stream loads... but there is only skeletons... Plz no creepy pasta this spooky story
twitch chat
October 2014
Kripp

I've become so much like Eren Jaeger, it's scary.

I've become so much like Eren Jaeger, it's scary. I wear black cardigans, verbally assault women, and physically assault my friends. When I look in the mirror, I can't help but say "戦い, 戦い" (which means fight, fight in american.) I grew my hair out long because I don't care so now I have to wear it in a bun and I don't care what people think so shut fuck up Hange! I always leave an open wound on my hand, and go out of my way to show it to everyone so they are reminded that I am in control. When I see dogs being taken on walks I get mad at them for not being free like I am. I can't have sex with my girlfriend anymore without forcing her to dress up as Mikasa or Historia, both of whom remind me of Armin. When I order fast food, I refuse to call them french fries and insist on calling them freedom fries. I just keep moving forward, until my enemies are destroyed.
April 2022

Anime

Weebs

Attack on Titan

Mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat

twitchquotes: FeelsRageMan Dear mister I'm-too-boosted-to-read-my-chat FeelsRageMan This will be the last message I ever send your ass FeelsRageMan
twitch chat
September 2017
imaqtpie

League of Legends

Troll face 5

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣶⠟⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⣛⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣟⣛⣛⣛⠛⠒⠲⠶⠦⣤⣤⣤⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣼⠏⠁⠀⠀⢀⣤⠶⣛⣩⣥⠤⠤⠤⠤⢤⣤⣤⣭⣭⣉⣉⣛⣛⣻⣭⣥⠬⡍⠛⢶⣄⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⠃⠀⠀⣠⡶⢋⡵⢛⡩⠵⠒⠒⠒⠒⠢⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣠⠤⠤⠤⢤⣄⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣿⠃⠀⠀⠘⢁⡴⢋⣴⢿⠒⠈⠉⣏⠉⠐⠒⡾⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⡠⠀⠀⢀⣀⣈⣙⣆⡀⠀⠀⢹⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⠟⣁⠀⠁⢀⣤⣦⣤⡀⠘⠀⢈⣷⡄⠀⠀⠀⣇⠖⠉⠙⠅⠀⠀⠉⠉⠑⢦⡈⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⢠⣾⢿⣧⠤⠤⠤⠄⠀⠖⣿⠀⠃⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⡗⠀⠐⠁⢸⡇⠀⣀⣰⠉⠠⠀⠀⣰⣶⣷⣶⠀⠀⠀⢱⡈⢻⣦⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣠⡿⣱⠋⢀⣴⠶⠚⠻⢶⣤⡘⢧⣄⠆⠂⠀⡉⠉⣉⣀⣀⠉⣠⡟⠁⠀⠉⢻⣆⠀⠀⠀⠘⠛⠟⠛⠀⠀⢈⡿⢍⢢⢹⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢠⣿⠁⡇⢠⣿⠁⠀⢰⣦⡀⠉⠉⠀⠈⠙⠲⠾⠾⠶⠶⠶⠚⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣯⡑⠢⢤⣀⣂⣀⣨⠤⠒⠛⠃⠘⡆⡇⡧⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⢸⣿⠀⡇⢸⡇⢠⣴⣾⠋⠛⢷⣦⣀⠀⠀⠀⠠⠤⠤⠴⢠⠶⠒⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⢿⣦⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣷⠀⠀⡼⢡⢣⡇⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⢿⡇⣧⠘⠿⠀⠀⠸⣧⡀⠀⠈⢻⡿⢶⣦⣄⡀⠀⠀⠸⣆⠐⠟⠻⠷⠀⠀⠀⢀⣾⠛⠃⠑⠤⠀⢀⣼⣿⡇⢀⠤⢂⣾⠃⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠈⢻⣌⠑⠦⠀⠀⠀⢿⣿⣷⣤⣸⣷⡀⠀⠈⠙⠻⢿⣶⣤⣄⣀⡀⠀⠀⠙⠿⠟⠁⠀⠀⢀⣠⡴⣿⠉⣿⣿⠀⠀⣼⠁⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⣷⡀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣀⣀⣼⠁⠀⠈⠉⠙⣿⠛⠛⠻⢿⠿⠛⠛⢻⡇⠀⢸⡀⣹⣿⠀⠀⡏⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⡀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣄⣀⣿⣄⣀⣀⣸⣄⣀⣠⣴⣿⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢷⡄⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢿⣦⠀⠘⣿⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣷⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠙⢷⣄⠘⢷⡀⠘⡟⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣧⡀⠻⣾⡃⠀⠀⠈⠙⢿⡿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣄⠈⠻⣦⡀⠀⠀⡼⠀⠀⠈⠙⠻⣿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢿⡿⣹⠇⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠹⣷⣄⠈⠛⠷⣼⣇⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⠀⠀⠀⢸⡇⠀⠀⡿⠀⢸⠇⣘⣧⠟⠀⢀⡿⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠛⢷⣄⡀⠀⠙⠻⠷⠶⣶⣾⣿⣤⣀⣠⣿⣄⣀⣴⠷⠶⠿⠿⠟⠋⠀⢀⣾⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⣶⣤⣤⣀⣀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣤⡤⠞⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠉⠙⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠛⠋⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
May 2021

Evil Jerma

⠉⠉⠉⣿⡿⠿⠛⠋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣻⣩⣉⠉⠉ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀⡀⠄⠄⠉⠉⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢤⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡀⠄⠄⠄ ⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠄⠉⠉⠉⣋⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠛⢷⡀⠄⠄ ⣿⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠠⣾⣿⣷⣄⣀⣀⣀⣠⣄⣢⣤⣤⣾⣿⡀⠄ ⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣹⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢟⢁⣠ ⣿⣿⣄⣀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠉⣉⣉⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣥⡀⠉⢁⡥⠈ ⣿⣿⣿⢹⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠒⠛⠛⠋⠉⠉⠛⢻⣿⣿⣷⢀⡭⣤⠄ ⣿⣿⣿⡼⣿⠷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣠⣿⣟⢷⢾⣊⠄⠄ ⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⣈⣉⣭⣽⡿⠟⢉⢴⣿⡇⣺⣿⣷ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠐⢊⣡⣴⣾⣥⣿⣿⣿
July 2022
Jerma985
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