Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas
New banger (from r/conservativerap)
Aye π
Yuh ππΎπ
Uh ππ€
Skrrrt π¨π€
I π hate π‘ people π« who have a different π‘ skin π
π»π color π¨ from me (x32)
instrumental πΊ break π
I ππ hate π‘π people π« who have a different πββ skin π
π»π color π³οΈβπ from me (x32)
Emoji Pasta
My kids were listening to Lil Nas X
My kids were listening to old town road by Lil Nas X and one of my kids asked me doesnβt he worship satan? Thinking face I said yes son sadly he does. I had to turn on No role modelz by J Cole to cheer him up My kids idolize someone better now! Thank you J Cole youβre a life saver!
A man has fallen into the river in Lego City! (uwu version)
a man has fawwen into teh riwer in lego city! owo
start the rescuwu hewicopter
HEY nuzzles u
Buiwd teh hewicopter and owoff to the resucuwu
prepare the lifeline, lowoer the stwetcher and make teh resucuwu
the newu emewgency cowwection fwom lego city!!!
Lego City
I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking (Nolan Grayson)
I'm shaking. I'm fucking shaking. I never wanted to breed with anyone more than I want to with Nolan Grayson. That perfect, shredded body. The perfectly trimmed mustache. The planet conquering skills of a literal god. It honestly fucking hurts knowing that I'll never mate with him, have him pass his genes through me, and have me birth a set of perfect offspring. I'd do fucking ANYTHING for the chance for Nolan Grayson to get me pregnant. A N Y T H I N G. And the fact that I can't is quite honestly too much to fucking bear. Why would Robert Kirkman create something so perfect? To fucking tantalize us? Fucking laugh in our faces?! Honestly, I just fucking can't anymore. Fuck.
Another extremely unjust loss
twitchquotes:
Once again, Kripp, you suffer another extremely unjust loss. I have no idea why you keep losing game after game, even though you possess superb drafting and world-class card game decision making skills. There's clearly something not right and I'm betting that someone at Blizzard may be a little jealous of you.
twitch chat
Kripp