[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
I used to be a real ad
More Copypastas

LPT: If you’re tall, when speaking to a short person, kneel down or else you’re being ableist

LPT: If you’re tall, when speaking to a short person, kneel down or else you’re being ableist Being short is a disability, and as a tall person, it's your responsibility to make sure short people don't get even more disabled by having to look up to speak to you. Doing this can damage their neck. Standing up while talking to short people also makes them feel threatened and unsafe so kneeling down not only prevents them from damaging their necks but also makes them feel more safe. Not doing this means you don't respect short people, you're mocking their disability, you're looking down on them and that's ableist, so be the bigger man and kneel. Thank you.
August 2021

sodaG

⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣤⣄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡿⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⣾⣿⣿⡆⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⡏⠒⢄⡀⠄⠄⢹⣄⣇⣀⣸⣷⣄⣦⠈⡿⣿⠟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⢠⠁⠄⠄⣙⡦⠒⠹⠄⠇⠴⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢷⣇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠘⣀⣠⡞⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠞⠛⠉⠉⠋⠄⠿⣧⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⣀⣀ ⠄⠄⣴⠟⠉⣿⣿⣷⡄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢨⠿⠉⠁⢀⣀⠴⠄⡸ ⠄⢰⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⢸⠄⠄⢀⣴⠞⢻⣿⣷⣦⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⢠⠚⠁⠄⠄⡰⠁ ⠄⠄⡻⣿⣿⣿⠿⡡⠃⠄⠄⣼⣇⣰⣾⣿⣿⣿⢻⠄⠄⠄⢀⣀⣀⣀⡠⠊⠄⠄ ⢀⠎⠄⠄⠉⠉⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⠟⢠⣿⡇⠄⡼⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⡜⠄⠤⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠛⠯⠭⠚⠁⠄⠄⠛⣣⣦⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⢇⠄⠄⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⠄⠢⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣠⣾⣿⣧⠸⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠸⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠻⠿⣿⣯⡟⣾⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠙⢄⡀⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢀⣠⠔⠒⠒⠋⣽⣿⣇⣿⣿⡇⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠉⠒⠤⢄⣀⣀⣠⠤⠔⠊⢹⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⠙⠉⣿⣿⡷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠸⠄⠄⠄⢰⣶⡄⢰⣿⣿⣷⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄
October 2021
sodapoppin

xqcS

⡿⣝⢮⢯⢾⢽⢽⢯⣟⣿⣻⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡯⣺⢕⡏⣗⢽⢽⢽⢞⡗⢯⢛⠚⠟⠻⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣫⢺⣸⣪⡳⣝⢕⢕⢵⣱⣣⡧⣇⣦⣢⣀⠄⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡪⣓⢮⢾⡽⣮⢧⡣⡣⡑⠩⢙⣯⡃⠑⠙⠳⣆⡀⠈⠹⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡪⡮⡯⡯⣿⢽⣯⣿⣺⢼⢜⡴⣝⢇⢀⠄⡀⢠⢩⠪⡢⣀⢉⠻⡿⣿⣿⡿⡿⢡ ⡪⡺⡺⡽⣽⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣯⣿⣳⣷⢷⣕⡕⣕⢕⡑⡜⡜⣵⣷⣿⣯⡳⣝⢰⣿ ⡪⣳⡫⡿⣽⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣽⣗⣯⣯⣾⡾⣷⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⢸⣿ ⢪⢒⢭⢯⣻⣻⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢃⣼⣿ ⢕⢱⠱⡕⡯⡷⣻⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⣟⢟⠏⠏⡏⣟⡽⡿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢉⣾⣿⣿ ⢕⢕⢱⢱⢱⡹⡕⡗⠯⡳⡫⡯⣎⢆⠄⢔⢝⣾⣿⣽⡳⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⣾⣿⣿⣿ ⠕⡌⡆⡧⣣⢧⡀⡨⣐⢈⠪⡚⢎⢗⢝⢌⢎⠯⢿⢿⡯⣷⣿⣿⣿⡇⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⡱⢨⢪⢯⣞⣗⡷⣝⢜⣼⣿⣬⣦⣣⣕⣕⣆⡇⠅⡀⠉⠓⡯⣿⢿⠇⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠨⢊⢮⢳⡳⡳⡯⡿⣽⢾⣝⢿⢿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⣾⣿⣿⣶⣶⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠈⠠⢱⢱⢝⢝⢎⢯⡺⡽⣺⢽⢕⡏⡗⠕⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣀⣀⣀⣃⣃⣋⣓⣓⣑⣙⣊⣓⣙⣘⣊⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
September 2019
xQcOW

mizkif maybe if u werent such an asshole

twitchquotes: lmao mizkif maybe if u werent such an asshole with a huge ego maybe the cool streamers like mitch jones would come over and learn mario 64 speed running tricks with you. lmao but ur just depressed its actually sad ur sad, i would know i'm a hate watcher that used to make $600k a month... anyway my dad's coming downstairs gotta go
twitch chat
May 2020
Mizkif

This is Morde’s mom

twitchquotes: Hi David, this is Morde’s mom. I noticed you haven’t been picking my son for your team in gym class. Morde has been having a really tough time since his dad and I split up, and it doesn’t make it easy on him when you reroll and say, „We’re never taking Morde.“ I think you should take a hard look at yourself in the mirror and think how it would feel if someone said that about you. Morde has phantom synergy, knight synergy, and he can hit 2 units! Why don’t you try being a bit more inclusive?
twitch chat
July 2019
dogdog

Teamfight Tactics

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