[Copypasta] I microwaved my jizz again.

Help me gumpy I fucked up. I was jerking off to my Sylveon plushie and decided to put it in the microwave but I left it in too long and burned the jizz and the plushie. Now the whole house fucking stinks and when my parents come home tomorrow from vacation they are going to know I microwaved my jizz again. Last time this happened I had to go to counseling and I gained like 50 lbs. I really don't want to go back on medicine. How the fuck do I get rid of the smell it is in the carpets and sofa. It smells like burned hair and plastic.
June 2021
(β–€ΜΏΔΉΜ―β”œβ”¬β”΄β”¬β”΄ Psst... kid, you wanna disable adblock?
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twitchquotes: Hey, kripp! What's up, man? It's Jeff from History class from last semester. I didn't know you were some kind of famous celebrity hahahaha. Hit me up, man. Btw, did you ever hook up with Brian? He was a T H I C C boy. xD You are such a dog. It's cool to see you again. Hit me up sometime!
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twitchquotes: Hey Kripparino riparino, I know you love your Hearthstone but you promised your loving father that you would start a cooking show soon. The gig is up, after this game you must Gordon Ramsay us one splendarino disharoni.
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β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–Œβ–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–„β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–“β–‘β–β–Œβ–‘β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“β–“ β–“β–“β–’β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–’β–“ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–€β–€β–Œβ–’β–’ β–“β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–€β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–€β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’ β–’β–’β–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–Œβ–„β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’ β–’β–β–’β–’β–‘β–‘β–‘β–‘β–ˆβ–ˆβ–ˆβ–„β–ˆβ–Œβ–‘β–‘β–‘β–’β–’β–’β–β–’β–’β–’ ▒▒▐▒▒░░░░▀▀▀▀░░░░▒▒▒▐▒▒▓ ▒▒▒▐▒▒░░░░░░░░░░░░▒▐▒▒▓▓ ▒▒▒▒▐▒▒░░░░░░░▐▄░▒▐▒▓▓▓▓ β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–Œβ–’β–’β–‘β–“β–“β–“β–“β–’β–’β–’β–’β–€β–’β–“β–“β–“β–“β–“ ▓▓▒▒▒▐▒▒░▓▓▓▒▒▒▐▀▓▓▓▓▓▓▓
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Jebaited isn't so great? Are you kidding me?

twitchquotes: Jebaited isn't so great? Are you kidding me? When was the last time you saw a meme with such influence and beauty in Twitch chat? Jebaited takes Twitch to another level, and we will be blessed if we ever see another Twitch meme with the same level of memeness. Unite my Twitch brothers! We will forever sing in the old Jewish hymn: "Kappa outdated. PogChamp overrated. Long have we waited. Now we Jebaited."
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Text-to-Speech Playing