[Copypasta] There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist

There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist. I'm always finding time to crank out a few p-ups. Ahh yep, I do maybe a thousand p-ups a day and I'm a father of two. Those nerds coloring with crayons? Time to squeeze in a few p-ups. Little dorks eating mac and cheese? It's p-up time. I'm like a leathered marble statue of a really muscular guy, my muscles are so tight and rugged. Hell, I took a p-up break while typing this comment. The ladies at work, these little work ladies, love when I crank out p-ups right there in front of them and come up off the floor red faced and with a sizeable bulge in my slacks. That bulge is unrelated to the p-ups, by the way, I'm just a guy who's always one hard nipple poking through a shirt away from a full meat platter. Hell, I'd cheat on my wife with one of these little work ladies if she wasn't one of the little work ladies I work with. We bone in the bathroom. I get jacked on p-ups and then we bone in the bathroom and there's nothing my boss can do about it because my vascularity is way too intimidating. I tell him he should do some p-ups if he wants to fuck my wife. It's the only way she gets that slizz juiced and loosed. She wants to see multitudinous p-ups and she wants to see those p-ups now! Whoops! Haha, okay, looks like she's watching me type this over my shoulder. Uh oh. See ya later, nerdbags. I'm gonna p-ups myself up to a full plumper and pump that honey ham rump of my little work lady wife.
April 2021
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ACHOO uh oh you just got the Delta variant!

ACHOOโ€ผ๏ธ๐Ÿคง๐ŸคงWhat was thatโ‰๏ธโ‰๏ธ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜Uh-oh ๐Ÿ˜ฏ looks like you just got ๐Ÿ‘€๐Ÿ‘€ the Delta variant! ๐Ÿ™€๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ˜œ Donโ€™t you know ๐Ÿ‡บ๐Ÿ‡ธโ‰๏ธ๐Ÿคข๐Ÿค•๐Ÿค’๐Ÿคค the world ๐ŸŒ HOE Organization ๐Ÿ™ˆ๐Ÿ‘… called it the most DOMINANT ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ๐Ÿ‘Š๐Ÿผ strain since the start of the ๐Ÿ—“ PANTIE-DEMIC ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿ‘ˆ No more touching daddy ๐Ÿ˜ฉ๐Ÿ˜ฉ ๐Ÿง“๐Ÿผ until you wash ๐Ÿงฝ๐Ÿงฝyour dirty ๐Ÿพnasty ๐Ÿคข little ๐Ÿคž๐Ÿผfingers โœ‹๐Ÿป๐Ÿคš๐Ÿปโœ‹๐Ÿป๐Ÿคš๐Ÿปfor 6๏ธโƒฃ9๏ธโƒฃ seconds with sHOEp ๐Ÿงผ and water ๐Ÿ’ง ๐Ÿ‘… otherwise it doesnโ€™t count ๐Ÿคก๐Ÿคก๐Ÿคก Time to stop ๐Ÿ›‘ spreading the germs ๐Ÿคฎ๐Ÿฅด๐Ÿค’and start spreading ๐Ÿ˜งyour legs๐Ÿคค๐Ÿฆถ๐Ÿฝ๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿปbecause everyone ๐Ÿ‘ฉโ€๐Ÿฆฐ๐Ÿ‘จโ€๐Ÿซ๐Ÿฆน๐Ÿพโ€โ™‚๏ธ๐Ÿงœ๐Ÿผโ€โ™‚๏ธhas to keep TWERKING ๐Ÿ˜ˆ๐Ÿ˜ˆfrom home! ๐Ÿก SEND THIS TO 1๏ธโƒฃ0๏ธโƒฃ other coronavirus cucks ๐Ÿ‘‰๐Ÿพ๐Ÿ‘Œ๐Ÿปotherwise Fuckboy Fauci ๐Ÿ™€๐Ÿ™€ is cumming for you ๐Ÿ†๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿ†
August 2021

Emoji Pasta

Coronavirus

COVID

Did you just really use a copypasta to respond to me?

Wow, WOW. Did you just really use a copypasta to respond to me? Instead of giving a proper response or ending the conversation like a sane person, you just use a copypasta and think you're a smartass? Guess what, i'm the one who is smart and you are the one who is an ass; because you just think copy and pasting something will get you to be in 1st place. Fucking speak to people properly instead of using one of those shitty lines of text.
October 2021

Ban one American, get the whole McDonald's

twitchquotes: OpieOP ban OpieOP one OpieOP american OpieOP and OpieOP you OpieOP get OpieOP the OpieOP whole OpieOP mcdonalds OpieOP
twitch chat
April 2017

MODS

Ban X Get The Whole Y

EU vs NA

Bunchie the Llama

โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–โ–ˆโ–Œโ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–€โ–€โ–„โ–„โ–„โ–€โ–€โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ–„โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆ โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–„โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–’โ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–’โ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€ โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€โ–€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ–ˆโ–ˆโ–€โ”€โ”€โ”€
ascii art
September 2021

Message Dongered

twitchquotes: <แดแด‡ssแด€ษขแด‡ แด…แดษดษขแด‡ส€แด‡แด…>
twitch chat
November 2014
Kripp
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