[Copypasta] There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist

There's no reason to have a Dad Bod when push ups exist. I'm always finding time to crank out a few p-ups. Ahh yep, I do maybe a thousand p-ups a day and I'm a father of two. Those nerds coloring with crayons? Time to squeeze in a few p-ups. Little dorks eating mac and cheese? It's p-up time. I'm like a leathered marble statue of a really muscular guy, my muscles are so tight and rugged. Hell, I took a p-up break while typing this comment. The ladies at work, these little work ladies, love when I crank out p-ups right there in front of them and come up off the floor red faced and with a sizeable bulge in my slacks. That bulge is unrelated to the p-ups, by the way, I'm just a guy who's always one hard nipple poking through a shirt away from a full meat platter. Hell, I'd cheat on my wife with one of these little work ladies if she wasn't one of the little work ladies I work with. We bone in the bathroom. I get jacked on p-ups and then we bone in the bathroom and there's nothing my boss can do about it because my vascularity is way too intimidating. I tell him he should do some p-ups if he wants to fuck my wife. It's the only way she gets that slizz juiced and loosed. She wants to see multitudinous p-ups and she wants to see those p-ups now! Whoops! Haha, okay, looks like she's watching me type this over my shoulder. Uh oh. See ya later, nerdbags. I'm gonna p-ups myself up to a full plumper and pump that honey ham rump of my little work lady wife.
April 2021
I used to be a real ad
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Vandelar from the castle jousting team

twitchquotes: Hail Kripp, 'tis I, Vandelar from the castle jousting team. How does life treat you today? I notice you continue to fool around with children's playing cards, some things never change! Art thou still playing the wizard of warcraft children's game? I never had time for such pursuits, for I found myself occupied with defending my honor, and laying with beautiful wenches. Alas, it was nice to see thou again, write me and we shall visit the tavern Kreygasm
twitch chat
May 2016
Kripp

only a real human being can buld a prper face

twitchquotes: πŸ‘ πŸ‘ƒ πŸ‘ only a real human being can build a proper face πŸ‘„
twitch chat
May 2017

Troll Face 2

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September 2016

Tote Vrump

twitchquotes: (⌐ Ν‘β–  ΝœΚ– Ν‘β– ) So kripp, decided to come back to hearthstone? Well too late. I will remember these past two days. Next year you'll beg... "Please vote for me, I'm Educational"... You know what I'll do? Tote Vrump (⌐ Ν‘β–  ΝœΚ– Ν‘β– )
twitch chat
April 2015
Kripp

OWO

⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⑇⠀⠀Ⓒ⣿⒰⣿⑆⠀⣾⣿⑆⠀⣾⣷⠀⣿⣿⑇⠀⠀Ⓒ⣿⣿⠀ β €β €β €β£Ώβ£Ώβ‘‡β €β €β’Έβ£Ώβ ˜β£Ώβ£Ώβ£€β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£€β£Ώβ‘‡β €β’»β£Ώβ‘‡β €β €β’Έβ£Ώβ£Ώβ € ⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⑇⠀⠀Ⓒ⑿⠀Ⓓ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁⠀Ⓒ⣿⣇⠀⠀Ⓒ⣿⣿⠀ β €β €β €β ™β’Ώβ£·β£Άβ£Άβ‘Ώβ β €β ˆβ£Ώβ£Ώβ Ÿβ €β£Ώβ£Ώβ ‡β €β €β ˆβ »β£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ£Ώβ‘Ώβ ‹
July 2019
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