[Copypasta] I think i need a special vaccine

I want to fuck the Samsung girl

Oh my fucking god I want to fuck the Samsung Virtual assistant so fucking bad, every waking second of my fucking life since the release of that fucking ad I’ve done nothing but think about her. I can’t go for more that 2 seconds without getting an erection the size of the Burj Khalifa and ejaculating at Mach 12. I’ve ejaculated so many times to simply the thought of her existence that my cock is no longer cumming sperm but literal fucking blood. I can’t stoping thinking about her even after passing out from the pain of cumming blood. I can’t complete nearly any daily tasks because my mind is continuously invaded by her perfection, I can’t live every day of my life thinking about angelic voice screaming in luscious pain about the new Samsung data plan while I fuck her perfect 3D modeled asshole. My personal hell will only get worse in a matter of hours as I will scavenge every corner of the internet in search of her rule 34 and my continuous stream of blood cum will only get worse as I’ll spend days, weeks, possibly months jacking off to her non-stop for any reason other than to shit, piss and eat. Simply at this point alone in writing this I’ve lost 2-3 liters of blood alone with just the simple thought of her existence. If this is how I die then I wouldn’t want it any other way.

June 2021

No girlfriend. No friends. No talents.

twitchquotes: 4Head

No girlfriend 4Head

No friends 4Head

No talents 4Head

Saturday night alone 4Head

Wasting time on Twitch 4Head

Watching a dead game 4Head

Reading the chat more than the stream 4Head

Spamming pastas brainlessly 4Head

Must be me

twitch chat

September 2018

Warrior vs warrior

twitchquotes: HEH, GREETINGS ResidentSleeper

ARMOR UP

I can take the hit ResidentSleeper

Welcome to the grand tournament ResidentSleeper

TANK UP

I'M OUT OF CARDS

twitch chat

March 2016

Reynad

Hearthstone

Exercise caution and stay away from the Subs

twitchquotes: SECURITY ALERT: A Romanian man, roughly 6'5", skeleton thin, with black hair and scraggly beard has been seen riding the NYC Sub train and violently "Bro-Fisting" passengers. He's accompanied by a short Asian man dressed as Hitler who reputedly cuts out the tongue of anyone who refuses to give him $5. Exercise caution and stay way from the Subs!

twitch chat

January 2015

Kripp

Hearthstone

Amazed Face

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ascii art

August 2018

[Copypasta] I think i need a special vaccine

I want to fuck the Samsung girl

No girlfriend. No friends. No talents.

Warrior vs warrior

Hearthstone

Exercise caution and stay away from the Subs

Hearthstone

Amazed Face

Confirm Subscription