Buy $COCK. I heard WSB is buying $COCK and $COCK IS THE NEXT BIG THING.
$COCK IS RISING TODAY.
Do your own DD on $COCK and let me know how much you like $COCK.
๐โ your ๐๐๐ $COCK to the ๐
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More WallStreetBets Copypastas
Police clearing out a homeless encampment
On my way into the office today I saw the police clearing out a homeless encampment under a bridge, forcing them into the cold and rain. I keep playing it over in my head and havenโt been able to focus on work all day because of my erection.
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$600 should last us for at least 5 months
Our government is so kind and caring for us. Waits till the very last minute to finally pass something and gives us $600 which should last us for at least 5 months. God bless this country
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No name calling
I just had a conversation w a ๐ that didnt resort to name calling... We just spoke our peace and wished ourselves good luck and now i dint know what to do with myself.
I think im going to go back and call him a bitch.
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Daily stock prayer
Time for our daily prayer:
Our calls, Who art in PLTR,
Perfect be Thy Timing.
Thy tendies come.
Thy expirations be done,
on earth as it is in Wall Street.
Give us this day our daily Lambos.
And forgive us of our puts,
as we forgive those who buy puts against us.
And lead us not into Debt,
but deliver us unto tendies. Amen
WallStreetBets
Unrealized losses
She runs her hand through your thinning hair and laughs. โWhat?โ you ask absentmindedly. Youโre looking at Futures, and youโre surprised to see them red.
โI want you to play with me.โ She says it playfully, but the single ounce of you that isnโt totally aloof realizes she said this in earnest. And so you do. You throw your phone, and you pin her to the sofa, then the ground. You both roll about, wrestling, like lion cubs. Kissing, lightly biting. Sometime later, you both stop, breathing hard. She grabs an open bottle of red wine, and you pass it back and forth. Eventually she says, โI want to do that more.โ
But youโve already found your phone again to check Futures. Still red. โUh huh,โ you say, distracted. She stares at you for a long moment, but you donโt realize it. Silently, she gets up and goes to bed, and you donโt say a word because you donโt notice.
She hasnโt left you yet, but she will soon.
Unrealized losses.