[Copypasta] Stimulus hopes in the year is 2025

The year is 2025. House speaker Nancy pelosi's brain jar has agreed with Mitch McConnell's new human skinbody to vote on the $12 covid stimulus package. This is the 37th revision to the package initially introduced in late 2020. One dollar will be split between all americans, two between all illegal immigrants, and the rest to Jeff bezos. Due to stimulus hopes, SPY has rallied to 600.
December 2020

WallStreetBets

I used to be a real ad
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where were u wen Melon Captol die (GameStop short squeeze)

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My instagram explore tab is full of...

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Google employees complaints

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Which one of you got reddit to send me this

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Is that insider trading?

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December 2020

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